You're browsing the archives of Sheldon.
You can search these comics too.
show: [ full transcriptions | abridged transcriptions | just the first line ]
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from June / 03 / 2004 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: Far be it from me to criticize... / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: I mean, I've never ONCE done the laundry... / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: But still... / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / socks: GLUB GLUB GLUB / ARTHUR: You gotta admit, it's not natural for socks to do that. / GRAMP: You wanna deal with their attitude, YOU wash 'em. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040603.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from June / 04 / 2004 | [[Inside (non-specific)]] / DANTE: In real small print at the bottom of this website, it says "caveat emptor". / SHELDON: That means "Let the buyer beware" in Latin. / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / DANTE: ???? / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / DANTE: How can I BEWARE of what I'm buyin' if I ain't even AWARE of what I'm readin'?!? / SHELDON: Thank you for that insight, Jethro Clampett. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040604.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from June / 05 / 2004 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: If it's true that "Those that can't do, teach"...
/ What happens to those that can't teach? / SHELDON: (eyes closed) / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: They become lawyers
/ ...and sue the pants off everyone else to make up for it. / ARTHUR: OH. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040605.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from June / 07 / 2004 | [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: Have you tried these new fresh-breath strips? / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: You put one of them on your tongue... Like Dit... / / [[THE HOUSE]] / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: And then, as it melts, you try to come to terms with the freakishly weird world of consumer products we live in... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040607.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from June / 08 / 2004 | [[Swimming pool]] / GRAMP: LOOK AT ME! I no longer JUMP into pools! Instead, I slowly ease down the steps....cringing at chilly water. / / [[Swimming pool]] / GRAMP: It's a sign, duck. I'm an old, old man. / ARTHUR: REALLY? Those shorts weren't the big tipoff? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040608.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from June / 09 / 2004 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: ...It's not technically croquet. We call it "Ultra Death-Match Croquet 9000." / ARTHUR: HEY! Remember the rules! The shot's no good if you have pants on!! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040609.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from June / 10 / 2004 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / NARRATOR: Kids' games start out so simple... / SHELDON: Let's play croquet! / DANTE: YEAH! / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / NARRATOR: But then the game gets boring, and new rules are introduced. / SHELDON: Ok, um, now you, um, have to dance the electric slide before you swing,.. / DANTE: AW... / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / NARRATOR: And eventually, it just gets ridiculous... / SHELDON: YOU'RE OUT! ...I tagged you with the magic sock! / DANTE: But not if I'm holding the salmon of invincibility, right? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040610.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from June / 11 / 2004 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / GRAMP: Listen fellas, I know you're playing your own weird version of croquet... / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / GRAMP: And I know you have all sorts of wacky rules... / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / GRAMP: But take my cooking pots the heck off your heads. / SHELDON: No can do. We're in the penalty box for fighting with the ref. / ARTHUR: ...Keep yappin' and you'll stay in there. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040611.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from June / 12 / 2004 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / GRAMP: You guys are done playing croquet already? I thought you were having fun making up new rules. / DANTE: We were. But it got weird. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / DANTE: ...Let's just say that CERTAIN people shouldn't be allowed to wear their Halloween "Chewbacca" costume outside. / SHELDON: IT'S A PERFECTLY LEGITIMATE WAY TO PLAY CROQUET!! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040612.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from June / 14 / 2004 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / GRAMP: Look, I almost NEVER criticize the ways you choose to spend your billions. But this time, I'm gonna put my foot down. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / GRAMP: You can not, I repeat, NOT hire the three actors from "Superman 2". / Zod: KNEEL BEFORE ZOD! / SHELDON: Heh-heh. That's tellin' him, Zod! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040614.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from June / 15 / 2004 | [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: The villains from "Superman 2" are in our kitchen... / SHELDON: Yeah. I hired them. I thought they'd make cool lackeys. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / / [[THE HOUSE]] / apron: KISS THE COOK / ARTHUR: I... I want some lackeys. / SHELDON: Of course you do. Everybody does. / Non (General Zod's minion): MY BAKE SNICKER DOODLE. ...LITTLE CRISPY. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040615.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from June / 16 / 2004 | [[THE HOUSE]] / Zod: ...I've actually been in tons of movies besides "Superman 2". / (SOUND FX): ssssssiiiip... / / [[THE HOUSE]] / Zod: I was in "The Limey" and "Billy Bu- / SHELDON: HEY! I'm not paying you to sit around all day!! / / [[Living Room]] / Zod: KNEEL BEFORE ZOD!! / SHELDON: There you go. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040616.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from June / 17 / 2004 | [[Sheldonsoft]] / NARRATOR: Sheldon hires the "Superman 2" actors. / Zod: Um, Mr. Sheldon? / SHELDON: Yes? / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / Zod: ...It's 2:30. Time for my break. / SHELDON: No problem. Enjoy your break. / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / SHELDON: Oh, but before you go... / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / Zod: "BRING ME THE SON OF JOR-EL!!" / SHELDON: Great! Enjoy your break! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040617.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from June / 18 / 2004 | [[Sheldonsoft]] / SHELDON: Villains of "Superman 2"! I have an exciting, important mission for you! / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / SHELDON: I need this paperwork deliverd to Hong Kong by 6 AM tomorrow! / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / Ursa (General Zod's minion): Um, you do know we can't actually FLY, right?? / Zod: ...It was just a "moovee"... / SHELDON: DANG. "FedEx" keeps raising my rates. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040618.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from June / 19 / 2004 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: You fired the villains from "Superman 2"? / SHELDON: Yeah, it just wasn't working out... / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: OH... / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: What an incredibly random week of strips. / SHELDON: ...But the three readers that remember "Superman 2" LOVED it. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040619.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from June / 21 / 2004 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / / [[Street]] / / [[THE HOUSE (front door)]] / / [[THE HOUSE]] / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: DON'T JUST STAND THERE!! GRAB SOME SCISSORS!! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040621.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from June / 22 / 2004 | [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: Are... Are you growing a mustache?? / GRAMP: I am indeed. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: Wow. That is just... Wow. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: Nothing says "I've give up being attractive" like a mustache. / GRAMP: Hey! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040622.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from June / 23 / 2004 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: It's sorta funny that you can grow a mustache, but can't grow a hair on your head. / GRAMP: Nuthin' wrong with being bald. You know what they say about guys with bald heads... / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / GRAMP: Um... That they need nice warm hats in the winter. / SHELDON: WHY DO I NEVER GET TO HEAR THE GROWN-UP PUNCHLINES?? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040623.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from June / 24 / 2004 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / GRAMP: So whaddya think of your grandfather's new mustache?! / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / GRAMP: That's the weakest thumbs-up I've ever seen... / SHELDON: NO! LOOK! I'M SMILING TOO! I MUST LIKE IT! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040624.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from June / 25 / 2004 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: There's something out of place about your mustache that I can't figure out. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: ...But maybe it's not the MUSTACHE. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: ...Maybe it's the fact that IT'S NOT 1978 ANYMORE. / ARTHUR: ...And you're not drinking "Pabst Blue Ribbon." http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040625.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from June / 26 / 2004 | [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: Comrade! The struggle goes well! / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: The five-year plan is producing vast amounts of food! / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: The proletariat salutes your leadership!! / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: He thinks I look like Josef Stalin... / ARTHUR: No capitalist dog could grow such a mighty mustache! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040626.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from June / 28 / 2004 | [[THE POND]] / DANTE: I've decided I want to be a billionaire when I grow up...
/ ...you seem to enjoy it. / SHELDON: It's not as easy as it looks. / / [[THE POND]] / / [[THE POND]] / (SOUND FX): splash splash / / [[THE POND]] / SHELDON: I'm realizing I didn't make that sound very convincing. / DANTE: HAVE YOU EVEN MOVED TODAY? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040628.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from June / 29 / 2004 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / sign: Leminade
/ 10 ¢
/ (cup included) / SHELDON: Whatcha doin'? / DANTE: Becoming a billionaire. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: A billionaire? Selling lemonade at ten cents a cup? / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / DANTE: For your information, I'm already AT THREE BUCKS!! / SHELDON: Whoa! Halfway there! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040629.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from June / 30 / 2004 | [[THE POND]] / SHELDON: If you really wanna be a billionaire, I'll give you the money. / DANTE: You... YOU WILL? / (SOUND FX): POINK! / / [[THE POND]] / SHELDON: Sure! I have more than I need. Take a few billion. / DANTE: Wow! / ARTHUR: HOLD ON... HOLD ON... Why does HE get billions when I'M still waitin' on that flyin' pony I asked for last Christmas?? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040630.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from July / 01 / 2004 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / GRAMP: You're serious? You gave Dante a billion dollars?? / SHELDON: 2.5 billion, actually. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / GRAMP: But that boy is a numbskull! Imagine the havoc he could cause with money! ...The unbelievably dangerous HAVOC!! / / [[ice cream shop]] / DANTE: Six - count 'em - six scoops. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040701.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from July / 02 / 2004 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: Now that I'm a billionaire, I can live my life any way I want. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: No one can tell me what to do ANYMORE. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / DANTE: And I never ever have to brush my teeth or take a bath again!! / ARTHUR: ...How delightful. "The Howard Hughes Guide to Fame and Fortune". http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040702.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from July / 03 / 2004 | [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: I can't believe Dante is a billionaire. Think of all the things he can buy now. / GRAMP: Ahhh, but remember: "The best things in life aren't even THINGS." / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: "Aren't even..." / / [[THE HOUSE]] / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: But...but... / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: You've fried his widdle brain... / ARTHUR: But...purchases...make...duck...happy... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040703.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from July / 05 / 2004 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / DANTE: Oo! Oo! The ice cream man!
/ ...I wish I had a buck on me. / ARTHUR: Are you joking?
/ You're a billionaire now. You're loaded with cash. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / DANTE: Oh, that's right! Well, I'm gettin' an ice cream!! / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / DANTE: You got change for a thousand? / ARTHUR: I hate you so very much right now. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040705.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from July / 06 / 2004 | [[sidewalk]] / ARTHUR: How much for a "Fudge Freeze"? / Ice Cream Man: $1.50 / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / DANTE: I see... I see... Interesting... / / [[sidewalk]] / DANTE: ...And how much for you to dance like a funny little monkey? MMF!! / SHELDON: Sorry - He's a recent billionaire. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040706.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from July / 07 / 2004 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: You LOST the money I gave you?? / DANTE: The e-mail said it was a sure-fire investment! / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: I gave you 2.5 billion dollars! / DANTE: How could I have known it was a scam? Half-price Nigerian gold sold on the Russian market sounded real! / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / DANTE: ...Can I have another billion? / SHELDON: NO. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040707.html |
Archive Page:
<< 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20
21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40
41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60
61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80
81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100
101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 >>