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| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 13 / 2002 | ARTHUR: Water. The wellspring of life. / / ARTHUR: Strong. Mysterious. Powerful yet calm. / / [[Kitchen]] / ARTHUR: ...Has God given us anything more glorious than water? / GRAMP: You can be so *$*@ inappropriate! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020213.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 14 / 2002 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / DANTE: Why are you so happy? / SHELDON: Greenspan just announced that the Fed would cut rates a quarter- point!! / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: You truly have to WORK at being that big 'a dork. / DANTE: ... I don't even know what he said. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020214.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 15 / 2002 | SHELDON: uh-oh... It's the head accountant. He HATES the way I run the company -- Always says I'm irresponsible. / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / SHELDON: I wonder what today's complaint will be? / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / SHELDON: ...Are you about to criticize the "Willy Wonka-Vator" I just bought?? / Head Accountant: IT'S A FICTIONAL ELEVATOR, MAN!! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020215.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 16 / 2002 | [[Living Room]] / GRAMP: Sheldon, your accountant is here to see you... / SHELDON: I'm not giving it up! I bought it! It's mine! / / [[Living Room]] / GRAMP: It's a ridiculous purchase. You have to give it up. / SHELDON: FINE... WHATEVER. / / [[Bridge]] / DANTE: I heard about Ecuador... I'm so sorry. / SHELDON: I only had two more payments. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020216.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 18 / 2002 | NARRATOR: The Head Accountant visits Sheldon. / Head Accountant: Sir, you have to run Sheldonsoft with a little more fiscal responsibility. / / Head Accountant: I let it go when you bought a swingset for the lobby.
/ ...And I overlooked the pinball games you put in the cafeteria. / / Head Accountant: But I can't even fathom why you bought peacocks!! / SHELDON: Um.... peacocks are neat. / ARTHUR: HEEEY... What's with all the cute honeys in the hallways? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020218.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 19 / 2002 | [[Sheldonsoft (meeting room)]] / Sheldonsoft Employee #1: I spent four years earning a business degree. Two more on my M.B.A. / / [[Sheldonsoft (meeting room)]] / Sheldonsoft Employee #1: ...I've spent every waking minute improving my business skills. / / [[Sheldonsoft (meeting room)]] / SHELDON: AAAIR-BALL! AAAIR-BALL! / Sheldonsoft Employee #1: ...Only to have my ten-year old boss taunt me during presentations. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020219.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 20 / 2002 | [[Sheldonsoft]] / Sheldonsoft Employee #1: Easy now...You can do it...Easy... / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / Sheldonsoft Employee #1: I MADE IT! Oh thank god I MADE IT! / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / ARTHUR: That is the most cruel management technique I've ever seen. / SHELDON: I think it's a GREAT way to give out promotions. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020220.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 21 / 2002 | ARTHUR: These are NOT mine. / / ARTHUR: What proof do you have that those are mine?
/ They could be anybody's.
/ They could even be YOURS. / / ARTHUR: I refuse to clean them up. / / [[Table]] / SHELDON: Man, you are one lazy duck. / GRAMP: oh for heaven's sake
/ THESE ARE YOUR FEATHERS!! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020221.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 22 / 2002 | [[Outside (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: The bully at school started calling me a "girl" today 'cause of the way I play sports. / / [[Outside (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: And when I asked Gramp if he thought I played like a girl, do you know what he said? / ARTHUR: What? / / [[Outside (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: "Don't you worry your pretty little head." / ARTHUR: Ooo! The kiss of death! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020222.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 23 / 2002 | [[Sheldonsoft]] / NARRATOR: A billion-dollar software business. / ARTHUR: Phone's ringing! / SHELDON: Hands full! / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / NARRATOR: Weekly sales in the millions. / ARTHUR: Phone's ringing! / SHELDON: Hands full! / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / NARRATOR: But one question arises... / ARTHUR: Phone's ringing! / SHELDON: Hands full! / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / NARRATOR: "Is there enough staff?" / SHELDON: ...That thought had popped up. / ARTHUR: Phone's ringing... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020223.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 25 / 2002 | SHELDON: Gramp, I think I need to hire more staff for my company. / GRAMP: Well I don't see why. / / GRAMP: If you look at the history of great companies: / / GRAMP: IBM, Standard Oil, McDonald's, Ford Motors... / / GRAMP: ... All of them relied mainly on a ten-year old and a duck. / SHELDON: Oh you're no help. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020225.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 26 / 2002 | [[Sheldonsoft]] / SHELDON: Arthur? Can you come in here and review these employee applications? / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / SHELDON: Art...? It's Sheldon. Do you think you can do that? / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / ARTHUR: You KNOW I'm standing right next to you. / SHELDON: I know, but this machine is so sweet... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020226.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 27 / 2002 | [[Sheldonsoft]] / SHELDON: EENIE, MEENIE, MYNIE, MO... HIRED. / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / SHELDON: HIRED. / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / ARTHUR: HIRED. / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / SHELDON: You think this is how all companies hire staff? / ARTHUR: Dunno. Maybe we should interview or something. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020227.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from February / 28 / 2002 | [[Sheldonsoft]] / Employee: Hello? Anyone here? I'm here for the interview. HELLO? / ARTHUR: Can I help you? / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / Employee: AIGH!! YOU SPEAK! / ARTHUR: Yep. / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / Employee: But... But... / ARTHUR: I'll be conducting our interview today. / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / Employee: But you're a duck! / ARTHUR: ...And you're unemployed. ...Shall we start? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020228.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 01 / 2002 | [[Sheldonsoft]] / ARTHUR: Thanks for coming in for this interview, Jill. / Jill: Sure! I just hope I don't come off as an ugly duckling! / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / Jill: Interviews always make me quack up! But that's water off a duck's back! / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / ARTHUR: You are SO not hired. / Jill: Oh c'mon, I'm just egging you on... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020301.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 02 / 2002 | [[Inside (non-specific)]] / Man (Generic): Honey, I'm back! And I got the job at Sheldonsoft! / Woman (Generic): ...at Sheldonsoft? / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / Man (Generic): Yeah! / Woman (Generic): ... Isn't that the company run by a ten-year old? / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / Woman (Generic): Won't that be weird... working for a little ten-year old? / Man (Generic): Umm, No... why would it be weird? / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / Man (Generic): Good Morning, Sir! / SHELDON: Can you tie these for me? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020302.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 04 / 2002 | [[Sheldonsoft (meeting room)]] / SHELDON: A big welcome to the new Sheldonsoft employees! Why don't we go around the room and introduce ourselves! / Jim: uh, Hi everyone. My name's Jim... / / [[Sheldonsoft (meeting room)]] / Jim: I've worked as an accountant for 20 years in some of America's biggest companies. And now... uh... I work for a 10-year old kid. / / [[Sheldonsoft (meeting room)]] / SHELDON: Welcome Jim! Who's next? / Jim: I DON'T AT ALL FEEL LIKE A LOSER! REALLY! / ARTHUR: Whoa Jim... Easy Now. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020304.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 05 / 2002 | [[Sheldonsoft (Hallway)]] / ARTHUR: So what do you think of this big Enron mess, boss? / / [[Sheldonsoft (Exterior)]] / ARTHUR: Illegal accounting, diversion of funds, shady moves by the company leadership... / / [[Sheldonsoft (Hallway)]] / ARTHUR: Sure glad WE don't have problems like tha- / SHELDON: O.K., yes, TECHNICALLY these popsicles were purchased with company money... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020305.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 06 / 2002 | [[Inside (non-specific)]] / ARTHUR: You dirty little thief... you spent $75 of office money on popsicles?!? I am shocked!! / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / ARTHUR: I'm reporting you the the acccounting department... you're goin' down! / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / SHELDON: Really? You would've said all that? / ARTHUR: If you hadn't split 'em? HECK YEAH I WOULDA! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020306.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 07 / 2002 | [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: Wow! I got an e-mail from Jim Norton! / ARTHUR: Who's Jim Norton? / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: My old Army buddy! I haven't spoken to Ol' Jim in ages! How nice of him to write me... / / [[THE HOUSE]] / (SOUND FX): Click! / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: It's...a forwarded joke. / ARTHUR: Dontcha love e-mail? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020307.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 08 / 2002 | [[The House]] / SHELDON: Wow... GESUNDHEIT. / ARTHUR: Every....
/ Bone...
/ Hurting... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020308.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 09 / 2002 | [[The House]] / ARTHUR: Theoretically, how does one distinguish a waffle iron from a portable CD player? / / [[The House]] / / [[The House]] / SHELDON: WHAT HAPPENED? / ARTHUR: Just answer my question. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020309.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 11 / 2002 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: Do you think Snoop Doggy Dogg would have been less successful if he had taken the name "Lulu, The Crime-Fighting Magician"? / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: Where'd you pull THAT out of?! / ARTHUR: You'd be amazed what keeps me up at night. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020311.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 12 / 2002 | [[THE POND]] / / [[THE POND]] / SHELDON: Such grace! Such finesse! / DANTE: A "ten" from the russian judge! / ARTHUR: Grrr... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020312.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 13 / 2002 | [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: All my stocks are down, Arthur. I gotta change my investments. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: But to what? Bonds? Real estate? Precious metals? / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: Mornin' Fellas. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: ...Pork bellies? / ARTHUR: PUT SOME DANG CLOTHES ON!! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020313.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 14 / 2002 | [[THE HOUSE]] / NARRATOR: A Morning Poem... / GRAMP: "There comes a day for every man -- a day when hope turns black." / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: "To find those hairs, once on your head," / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: "....Have moved down to your back." / ARTHUR: WHOA THERE SASQUATCH! ....How about a t-shirt?! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020314.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 15 / 2002 | [[Bathroom]] / GRAMP: "Here I stand like a child reborn, with only a towel on this bright new morn." / / [[Bathroom]] / GRAMP: There's no clothing on me: no shoes, coat, or scarf -- / / [[Bathroom]] / ARTHUR: ...But if that towel falls, I think that I'll barf. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020315.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 16 / 2002 | ARTHUR: Peter Paul Rubens was a 17th-centure painter made famous by his portraits of heavy set women. / / ARTHUR: In fact, his paintings were so popular, that larger women began to be called "Rubenesque." / / ARTHUR: So apparently, weight was a big fashion statement at one point. / / GRAMP: And why are you bringing this up now? / ARTHUR: Just an interesting historical note... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020316.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 18 / 2002 | SHELDON: Check out my new invention, Arthur! / ARTHUR: A scooter? / / SHELDON: Not just ANY scooter... mine folds up super small... / (SOUND FX): SNAP click! / / SHELDON: See? You can get it down to pocket-size. / / ARTHUR: Wow! That's a pretty cool inven-- / SHELDON: ... And it's made out of "Fruit Roll-Ups", so it's edible.... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020318.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from March / 19 / 2002 | [[Sheldonsoft]] / SHELDON: Phlbt! / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / SHELDON: NYAAH! / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / SHELDON: Oo! Oo! Oo! / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / ARTHUR: What took you so long? The Microsoft folks have been waiting in the conference room. / SHELDON: Preparin' my meetin' notes... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020319.html |
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