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| Sheldon Comics comic strip from September / 11 / 2004 | [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: Fear not, citizen! The DUCK is here! Your cookies are safe! / / [[THE HOUSE (Kitchen)]] / ARTHUR: As guardian of this fair city, I promise that no cookies shall be stolen on my watch! / / [[THE HOUSE (Kitchen)]] / / [[THE HOUSE (Kitchen)]] / ARTHUR: But there is the small matter of my compensation. / GRAMP: You're not gettin' any cookies... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040911.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from September / 12 / 2004 | [[front yard]] / DANTE: What's with the yard sale? / SHELDON: Gramp is making me get rid of some purchases. He says I'm abusing my billions. / / [[front yard]] / DANTE: So you have to get rid of your lifetime supply of Spock ears? / SHELDON: Sadly. / / [[front yard]] / DANTE: ...And your jackalope? / SHELDON: Unfortunately. / / [[front yard]] / talking Japanese toilet: I shall miss our chats, Sheldon-san. / DANTE: ...And your talking Japanese toilet? / / [[front yard]] / DANTE: ...And Switzerland? / SHELDON: ...But I'm keepin' the chocolate. / / [[front yard]] / DANTE: ...And your statue from"Lord of the Rings"? / GRAMP: He had it in the breakfast nook. Scared the "Cap'n Crunch" outtta me. / nerd: Excuse me, how much for Luke Skywalker? / Luke Skywalker (Mark Hamill): MY NAME IS MARK HAMILL!! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040912.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from September / 19 / 2004 | [[Sheldonsoft]] / Employee: Boring platitude. / Employee 2: Boring platitude in return. / Employee 3: Glittering generality about the weather. / Employee 4: Equally glittering response, masking over personal feelings of loathing. / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / Employee: Banal comment. / Employee 2: Banal comment. / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / Employee: Complaint about a recent occurence. / Employee 2: Agreement over said occurence. / Employee 3: Obvious statement regarding the day of the week. / Employee 4: Upcoming game of chance, and it's potential for life-changing wish fulfillment. / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / SHELDON: Office conversation is so LAME... / ARTHUR: YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE CRAZY TO WORK HERE, BUT IT CERTAINLY HELPS! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040919.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from September / 20 / 2004 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Magazine: Forbes / ARTHUR: WHOA... The Sheldonsoft stock is down 26%. / SHELDON: It is? That's no good at all. What do you think I should do about it? / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Magazine: Forbes / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Magazine: Forbes / Calendar: October 10 / ARTHUR: Well, you could go into the office, for starters. / SHELDON: Hey, I take a very French attitude toward work. My summer vacation ends October 10th. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040920.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from September / 21 / 2004 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / NARRATOR: Our hero heads off to work! / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / NARRATOR: Though he owns a billion-dollar company, our hero hasn't been in to the office for SIX MONTHS! / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / NARRATOR: Is he nervous? Feeling guilty? What's going through our hero's mind? / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: HE'S HOPING YOU'LL STOP NARRATING HIS DAY!! / ARTHUR: It looks like our hero is starting to crack. Let's watch! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040921.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from September / 22 / 2004 | [[Sheldonsoft]] / SHELDON: Think, Sheldon, THINK! Your stock is down 26%. You need to take charge of the situation! / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / SHELDON: What would Captain Kirk do in a situation like this? / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / ARTHUR: ...Make out with some alien babe, probably. / SHELDON: Ooo... You're right. What would Captain PICARD do in a situation like this?? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040922.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from September / 23 / 2004 | [[Sheldonsoft]] / SHELDON: Dear Employees: You may have noticed that our stock dropped 26% this morning. I have a two-step plan to fix this. / (SOUND FX): tap tap tap / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / SHELDON: Step 1: Purchase a monkey for the company. / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / SHELDON: Step 2: Everyone laugh at the funny little monkey. / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / ARTHUR: I believe Chrysler uses the same strategy. / SHELDON: Hee-hee! He's tickling me! / monkey: Oop oop oop... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040923.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from September / 24 / 2004 | [[Inside (non-specific)]] / SHELDON: This is horrible, Arthur!
/ I don't know how to get my company's stock back up! / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / SHELDON: I'm only ten! I can't wave my magic wand and fix it! / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / SHELDON: Waitaminute... a magician... / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / SHELDON: Give me the yellow pages / ARTHUR: Oh no, you don't. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040924.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from September / 25 / 2004 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Zesto the Magician: Behold! I am ZESTO the Magnificent! / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Zesto the Magician: I am here to enchant! To delight! To bring magic to those who need it most! / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: Not a heavy dater in high school, eh Zesto? / Zesto the Magician: ...The ladies were resistant to my magical charms, yes. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040925.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from September / 26 / 2004 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: What are you doing? / ARTHUR: I'm hunting smurfs. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: "Smurfs"? Smurfs don't exist. / ARTHUR: Sure they do. They're just hard to catch. Didn't you ever watch the show? / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: Why would you want to catch smurfs, anyway? / ARTHUR: I assume they're tasty. Gargamel was always trying to cook 'em. ...Now quiet while I use my smurf call. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: MY GOODNESS! WHAT A SMURFINGLY SMURFY DAY TO GO SMURFING! / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: ...You are so smurfin' lame. / ARTHUR: You shut the smurf up. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040926.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from September / 27 / 2004 | [[Sheldonsoft]] / Zesto the Magician: I am Zesto the Magnificent!
/ I have been summoned to work my magic! / SHELDON: Yeah, I need you to magically raise my company's stock price to-
/ Ooo!! Wait... it just went back up. / (SOUND FX): Ding! / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / Zesto the Magician: Um... t'was I! / SHELDON: Yeah, sure it was http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040927.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from September / 28 / 2004 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: I'm sorry Zesto, but it doesn't look like my company needs a magician. / Zesto the Magician: But I bring more than mere magic! I bring wonder and excitement! / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Zesto the Magician: Surely your company could use a little WONDER in the workplace!? / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: I'm sorry... no. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Zesto the Magician: How 'bout faxing? You need any faxing done? My temp agency hasn't called in weeks. / SHELDON: Ah, the glamorous life of the magician. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040928.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from September / 29 / 2004 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: It's not fun being a street magician? / Zesto the Magician: Oh heck no. It's a war out there. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: A war? With who? / Zesto the Magician: MIMES. They're so dang territorial. / / [[Street]] / sign: Tips welcome / Mime: HEY! 'Dis here's Big Jimmy's block! I told you, Big Jimmy don't like him no competition, see?? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040929.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from September / 30 / 2004 | [[Sheldonsoft]] / ARTHUR: What happened to that magician? / SHELDON: He needed a job, so I gave him a spot in the company mailroom. / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / ARTHUR: Oh. Well that's nice of you. / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / ARTHUR: ...Let's hope you don't come to regret it. / SHELDON: Regret it? Why would I regre- / Zesto the Magician: AND LIKE MAGIC, ANOTHER LETTER FLOATS INTO THE ROOM! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/040930.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 01 / 2004 | [[Sheldonsoft]] / SHELDON: Zesto, I'm afraid you're just not working out in the mailroom. / Zesto the Magician: WHAT? / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / SHELDON: A magician is all about sleight of hand and making you think something's there when it's not. None of that is useful in the mailroom. / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / SHELDON: So, I'm moving you to another department... / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / sign: ACCOUNTING http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/041001.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 02 / 2004 | [[Sheldonsoft]] / ARTHUR: I can do magic! Wanna see? / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / ARTHUR: The magician and I have been working on this AWESOME trick. You're gonna be amazed! Hold on, I'll show you... / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / Zesto the Magician: Um... watch me pull a rabbit out of m- / ARTHUR: DUCK, YOU IDIOT! I'M A DUCK! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/041002.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 03 / 2004 | [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: All aboard Arthur's rocket ship to the moon! / GRAMP: Hey! Fun! I'll take a ride! / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: Um... I'm not sure this rocket can, uh, handle... / GRAMP: TO THE MOON WE GO! / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: No... um... seriously... / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: OOF. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: HERMPH... / / (SOUND FX): FWUMP / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: Oh darn it. I broke your rocket. / ARTHUR: And yet, you've still managed to reach the moon. Congratulations. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/041003.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 04 / 2004 | [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: The Eskimo have dozens and dozens of ways to say "snow". / / [[THE HOUSE (Bathroom)]] / paper bag: The Costume Shop / ARTHUR: Why is there only one way to say "nerd"? / SHELDON: I dunno... But there are five ways to say "glorious battle of the nerds" in Klingon. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/041004.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 05 / 2004 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / DANTE: I wanna be a modern artist. There are no standards in modern art. You can do ANYTHING you want. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / DANTE: Here's my first piece. I call it "absence". / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: ....But there's nothing there. / DANTE: GOOD! GOOD!! ...My work touches you! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/041005.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 06 / 2004 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: How's the modern art coming? / DANTE: Good! I just finished my next piece. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / DANTE: ...I call it "tired of nature". / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: But I hung that tire swing. / DANTE: Yes, but it was my artistic vision that gave it life! / ARTHUR: ...By giving it a dorky name? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/041006.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 07 / 2004 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: What's all this? / DANTE: I'm making "found art". It's where an artist creates masterpieces out of objects they find. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: Hmph. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: Found me some 'Cheetoes'. I'm a visionary. / DANTE: ...Gonna find a foot in your keister in a minute. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/041007.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 08 / 2004 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: So with "found art", an artist can use any object they find to create art? / DANTE: Yep. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: ANY object? / DANTE: I said yes. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: Good. 'Cause I found this object. / DANTE: ...But that's a Van Gogh painting! / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: Nope. It's my new work of found art. I call it "I'm Buyin' me a Condo". / DANTE: Put it back where you found it! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/041008.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 09 / 2004 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: If you want to be a famous artist nowadays, you only need to do one thing: be naked as much as possible. The media goes ga-ga over nudity. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / DANTE: Is that why you're naked all the time? / ARTHUR: Naked? What are you talking abou- / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: HOLY...! GET ME SOME SLACKS! PRONTO! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/041009.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 10 / 2004 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / DANTE: How do you know what's art and what's not? / ARTHUR: Oh, that's simple. "Art" is anything people don't wanna see. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: Opera... no one goes to see it. "Art". Tv... everyone watches it. "Not art". / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: Poetry... no one reads it. "Art". Romance novels... read by millions. "Not art". / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: Sculpture museum... can't pay people to go. "Art". Rock concerts... can't keep people away. "Not art". / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / DANTE: Ok then, Mr. Smartypants... how does your theory explain EVERY MADONNA MOVIE EVER MADE? / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / shirt: Call me Esther / Arrow: "Mrs. Butterworth" ...not an "Oscar". / ARTHUR: Ohmygosh... you're right! Nobody saw those! They're ART! / Madonna: Finally! Recognition for my work! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/041010.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 11 / 2004 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: AIGH! I'm naked! / DANTE: You're SUPPOSED to be naked. You're a BIRD. Mother Nature gave you a special dispensation to wear NOTHING. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: Oh... like Cristina Aguilera. / DANTE: No... I think Mother Nature's pretty peeved about that one. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/041011.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 12 / 2004 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / GRAMP: Ohmygosh! I just heard the news! You’re totally nude!! / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / GRAMP: COMPLETELY STARK-RAVING NAKED!! / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: …Are you making fun of me? This is serious. / GRAMP: Hide your shame you trollop! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/041012.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 13 / 2004 | [[Inside (non-specific)]] / ARTHUR: No. / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / ARTHUR: No. / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / ARTHUR: No. / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / ARTHUR: Hey - this could work. / SHELDON: ...And you don't AT ALL look like Danny DeVito in formal wear. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/041013.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 14 / 2004 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: You don't like these clothes on me? / SHELDON: Leave me out of this. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: Well, am I clothes to the truth? / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: ...Am I clothes but no cigar? / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: ...I'm clothes to leaving. / ARTHUR: Don't clothes your mind to new possibilites!! Remember - when you clothes a door, God opens a window! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/041014.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 15 / 2004 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Magazine: Wired / SHELDON: How'd you get that tie ON, anyway? You don't have hands. / ARTHUR: Ugh. It took me three hours. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Magazine: Wired / ARTHUR: ...But the trickier part was how I got these undies on. / SHELDON: NO ONE'S ASKING! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/041015.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 16 / 2004 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: If you think about it, all of history's greatest people wore clothes. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: Name me ONE NUDE PERSON who ever amounted to anything?? / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: Lady Godiva. / ARTHUR: Ooo! Yeah! Good chocolate! ...Still, it's a little freaky buying candy from a nudist. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/041016.html |
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