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Sheldon Comics comic strip from July / 14 / 2005 [[Car]] / SHELDON: That hotel has a pool! / GRAMP: I can see that. Please put your seatbelt back on. / / [[Car]] / SHELDON: But the pool! You're passing the pool! / GRAMP: There are four hours of daylight driving left. I promise there'll be other hotels with pools. / / [[Car]] / SHELDON: We can't take that risk. / ARTHUR: He's right! You fool! He's right! The pool holds all the answers!
Sheldon Comics comic strip from July / 15 / 2005 [[Grand Canyon]] / GRAMP: Here we are, fellas! The Grand Canyon. / / [[Grand Canyon]] / GRAMP: When you look down at the very bottom, you're looking at earth as it was 2 BILLION years ago. / / [[Grand Canyon]] / / [[Grand Canyon]] / GRAMP: Except for that "Happy Meal" wrapper. / SHELDON: I was gonna say...
Sheldon Comics comic strip from July / 16 / 2005 [[Grand Canyon]] / sign: Can you run the Boston marathon? Then don't even TRY to hike the Grand Canyon in one day. / SHELDON: ...I love how he's still considering it. / ARTHUR: YOU GET WINDED ON YOUR SECOND TRIP TO THE FRIDGE!
Sheldon Comics comic strip from July / 17 / 2005 [[Grand Canyon]] / Tourist: Dude! Check it out! The Grand Canyon! / / [[Grand Canyon]] / Tourist: It's so massively massive! / GRAMP: Um, sir... you may want to move back from the edge. / / [[Grand Canyon]] / Tourist: Just look at it! It's waaaaay bigger than my apartment. / GRAMP: Sir... please, you have flip-flops on! Move back! / / [[Grand Canyon]] / ARTHUR: Keep watching. This is how evolution happens. / Tourist: ...Think I could jump it?
Sheldon Comics comic strip from July / 18 / 2005 [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / NARRATOR: Day one of a roadtrip always starts out well / GRAMP: Zip-a-dee doo-da, zip-a-dee day! / SHELDON: Zip-a-dee doo-da, zip-a-dee day! / ARTHUR: Zip-a-dee doo-da, zip-a-dee day! / / [[Car]] / NARRATOR: By day three, the mood sours just a tad / ARTHUR: I hate everything you stand for. / / [[Car]] / NARRATOR: Then, at day five, there's a sudden lift in mood / GRAMP: ZIP-A-DEE DOO-DA... / SHELDON: ZIP-A-DEE DOO-DA... / ARTHUR: ZIP-A-DEE DOO-DA... / / [[Car]] / NARRATOR: Which is followed on day six by a new problem / ARTHUR: Oh man. This car smells like FOOT.
 
Sheldon Comics comic strip from July / 19 / 2005 [[road]] / NARRATOR: Day one of a roadtrip always starts out well. / SHELDON: Zip-a-dee doo-da, zip-a-dee day! / GRAMP: Zip-a-dee doo-da, zip-a-dee day! / ARTHUR: Zip-a-dee doo-da, zip-a-dee day! / / [[Car]] / NARRATOR: By day three, the mood sours just a tad. / ARTHUR: I hate everything you stand for. / / [[Car]] / NARRATOR: Then, at day five, there's a sudden lift in mood. / ARTHUR: ZIP-A-DEE DOO-DA... / SHELDON: ZIP-A-DEE DOO-DA... / GRAMP: ZIP-A-DEE DOO-DA... / / [[Car]] / NARRATOR: Which is followed on day six by a new problem. / ARTHUR: Oh man. This car smells like FOOT.
Sheldon Comics comic strip from July / 20 / 2005 [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / GRAMP: It's $30 to get into Yellowstone National Park? / Ranger: Please don't start in with me. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Ranger: ALL DAY LONG I have to listen to folks complain about that dumb fee. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Ranger: And I have to do it in 105° heat! / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Ranger: And in a uniform that looks uncomfortably close to a U.P.S. delivery guy. / GRAMP: Um... here's 40 bucks.
Sheldon Comics comic strip from July / 21 / 2005 [[Yellowstone National Park]] / SHELDON: MR. RANGER! MR. RANGER! ...There's a fire over at the campground! / Ranger: Uh-oh. I better call in for backup rangers. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Power Ranger: Guys! We're getting the call!
Sheldon Comics comic strip from July / 22 / 2005 [[Yellowstone National Park]] / SHELDON: Wait, you're not national park rangers. You're mighty morphin' Powers Rangers. / Power Ranger: Yeah. We needed the work. Hunh! / / [[Yellowstone National Park]] / Power Ranger: Kids today are HUNH just too sophisticated. HUNH. They don't seem to like our live-action antics. HUNH. / / [[Yellowstone National Park]] / SHELDON: I can't imagine why. / Power Ranger: Hold on, I need to fight this tree.
Sheldon Comics comic strip from July / 23 / 2005 [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Power Ranger: The life of a Power Ranger is a life of... HEE-YA! / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Power Ranger: It's a life of... HUNH a life of... HOOO! / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: ...Are you ok? / Power Ranger: "Ritalin"... not working. Feel need... to ... air kick... for no... good... reason...
 
Sheldon Comics comic strip from July / 24 / 2005 [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Power Ranger: ...And remember, kids: "Be cool - stay in school!" / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Power Ranger: 'Cause knowledge is power! Even more powerful than the Power Rangers! / SHELDON: Wow! Thanks, Mister! / ARTHUR: Wow! Thanks, Mister! / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / apron: God bless this mess. / Power Ranger: My life is a lie. / pink power ranger: ...Don't worry, honey. Lots of Power Rangers can't read. You'll get there.
Sheldon Comics comic strip from July / 25 / 2005 [[Yellowstone National Park]] / GRAMP: Look, duck! "Old Faithful"! / ARTHUR: Why do they call it that? / / [[Yellowstone National Park]] / GRAMP: 'Cause every hour on the hour, the water pressure suddenly builds up! It's like clockwork. / / [[Yellowstone National Park]] / Man (Old): Yep. That's pretty much the definition of "old" all right.
Sheldon Comics comic strip from July / 26 / 2005 [[Yellowstone National Park]] / ARTHUR: Checkin' out the Yellowstone Hot Springs? / GRAMP: Sort of. I'm taking all of my hatred for my enemies, and I'm throwing it into these cauldrons. / / [[Yellowstone National Park]] / / [[Yellowstone National Park]] / GRAMP: ...I'm on Ryan Seacrest at the moment. / ARTHUR: I'll give you time.
Sheldon Comics comic strip from July / 27 / 2005 [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.) (Hot spring)]] / ARTHUR: You're throwing "hate" into a hot spring? / GRAMP: I'm trying to get rid of all my negative emotions by casting them away. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.) (Hot spring)]] / ARTHUR: Is it working? / GRAMP: Well, I'm having trouble getting rid of SOME hate. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.) (Hot spring)]] / GRAMP: Specifically, for the Starbucks marketing guy that came up with "tall, venti and grande." / ARTHUR: ...Three words that mean "large". Truly, he was a prince among copywriters.
Sheldon Comics comic strip from July / 28 / 2005 [[Yellowstone National Park]] / SHELDON: HELP! Mr. Ranger! That bison is following me!! / Ranger: Yeah. They do that lately. / / [[Yellowstone National Park]] / Ranger: Too many tourists ignore the signs and feed the wildlife. / It's getting ridiculuos. They're like big house pets now. / / [[Yellowstone National Park]] / SHELDON: So how do I get rid of him? / Ranger: Oh man... whatever you do, don't give him marshmallows. / Bison: Marf-ma-lo??
 
Sheldon Comics comic strip from July / 29 / 2005 [[Yellowstone National Park]] / diagram: NATURE TALK / Ranger: It's rarely talked about, but Yellowstone is actually a massive SUPER VOLCANO, with a caldera over 1500-square miles wide. It could blow at any time. / GRAMP: Well there's a fun fact you don't hear every day! / SHELDON: Imagine that! / / [[Yellowstone National Park]] / park sign: Now leaving Yellowstone. / Someone: LIKE THE WIND, MAN! DRIVE LIKE THE WIND!
Sheldon Comics comic strip from July / 30 / 2005 [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: Dear Dante - Well, we just left Yellowstone. You'd love it! / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: There's so much to see: buffalo, elk, and moose... geysers and hot pools. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: But the BEST part, the absolute best part, was the / ARTHUR: Ooo! A cliffhanger! / SHELDON: *§*@ postcard!
Sheldon Comics comic strip from July / 31 / 2005 [[Car]] / can of soda: Diet Cherry Vanilla Dr. Pepper / ARTHUR: What're you drinking? / SHELDON: "Diet Cherry Vanilla Dr. Pepper". / / [[road]] / ARTHUR: You're kidding. That's what it's called?* / SHELDON: Yeah. It's a bit of a long name. / Dave Kellett: *'Tis true - Dave / / [[Car]] / can of soda: Diet Cherry Vanilla Dr. Pepper / ARTHUR: A bit?? It reads like a Russian novel. ...Or a cookbook listing every conceivable ingredient you could put in soda. / / [[Car]] / ARTHUR: Man... Just imagine the poor graphic designer that had to make the LOGO for that train wreck. / / [[office]] / Computer: Diet Cherry Vanilla Dr. Pepper / Dr. Pepper employee: ...Can we squeeze two more words on there? Like, "Super Fantabulous Diet Cherry Vanilla Dr. Pepper". ...Or "Super MEGA Fantabulous"... / Dr. Pepper employee 2: ...And can we have it say "Packed with 17 conflicting flavors"? / graphic designer: I hate my job.
Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 01 / 2005 [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: Gramp? Are you crying..... at a song? / GRAMP: Yeah... Beethoven always gets me. / ARTHUR: Oh don't pretend like you don't cry at music too, Shel. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: I... I don't. NO don't! Seriously / ARTHUR: Oh no? Well, let me just cue it up, here. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / GRAMP: What is this? / ARTHUR: That Enya song from "Lord of the Rings" / SHELDON: You gave so much! Oh, gentle Frodo! You gave 'till there was nothing left to give!! WAAAAHHH
Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 02 / 2005 [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: G-G-Gramp? Did you hear that? / GRAMP: It's just forest noises. We're safe. Go back to sleep. / / [[Tent]] / SHELDON: You're pretty brave, you know that? / GRAMP: Heh heh heh... that's my job. Being an adult means being level-headed. / / [[Tent]] / GRAMP: ...Even when you're freaked out by what is clearly a cyborg t-rex right outside. ...Or a drunk sasquatch.
 
Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 03 / 2005 [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / NARRATOR: I think that I shall never see a poem as lovely as a tree... / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / NARRATOR: And under trees I take my rest... for camping seems to me the best! / / [[Tent]] / NARRATOR: On pebbled ground and hardened earth... I lay my happy body's girth. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / NARRATOR: To find, at morning, as I rise my back don't work, to my surprise. / GRAMP: Searing pain... hate.. all... of nature... right now / ARTHUR: And thus, we return to staying at Motel Sixes.
Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 04 / 2005 [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / GRAMP: Cleaning a fish is easy. First, you cut off the head and tail. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / GRAMP: Then you split it up the middle with your knife and scoop the guts out with your hands. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / GRAMP: Then you scrape off all the scales with the flat of your knife. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / GRAMP: ...And then you become a vegetarian as you remember how gross this whole process is. / SHELDON: Man, you ain't kiddin'.
Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 05 / 2005 [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Woman (Generic): Hi! I’m from the campsite next door. Would you folks like some S’mores? / GRAMP: Sure! / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Woman (Generic): Cause we were thinking that S’mores would really hit the spot right now. / GRAMP: Yeah! / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Woman (Generic): Wouldn’t you love to taste just one delicious ‘Smore? / GRAMP: Yes! / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Woman (Generic): So would we. Here’s your *§@! duck back. / ARTHUR: GUESS WHERE I’VE BEEN!
Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 06 / 2005 [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / NARRATOR: You know bugs can ruin a good night's sleep when you're camping / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / NARRATOR: So you're very careful to close up the tent quickly when you get in / (SOUND FX): Ziiiiip! / / [[Tent]] / NARRATOR: And before you lay down, you scan the tent thoroughly with a flashlight. / / [[Tent]] / NARRATOR: But somehow, a big ol' honkin' mosquito always gets in... / Mosquito: Goot eve-a-ning.
Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 07 / 2005 [[THE POND]] / ARTHUR: Do you think they'll still have Frank Sinatra music 300 years from now? / GRAMP: HMF... probably. / / [[THE POND]] / GRAMP: ...But they'll go too far and clone a genetically-modified Frank. / / [[THE POND]] / GRAMP: Or maybe they'll just clone his brain ...and put it into a gigantic, singing robot body. / / [[THE POND]] / ARTHUR: Well hello, Mister Optimistic-About-The-Future! / GRAMP: And then the robot will turn on them and impose a ring-a-ding-ding dictatorship! / SHELDON: So he'll have a swingin', crazy cuckoo coup?
 
Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 08 / 2005 [[Camping site (showers)]] / NARRATOR: There is no finer sampling of the human race than the public showers of a campground around 6:30 AM / weird person: Cheetas! Cheetas in my pants! Why won't they leave me be?!? / weird person 3: Y'all don't mind if ma bloodhounds take a showerin' do ya? / bloodhounds: Baroo!
Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 09 / 2005 [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: Hey! Did you hear they're making a new "Dr Who"? / ARTHUR: So what... you hate that show. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: I do not! / ARTHUR: You said it had "the production value of a rural school play". / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: No I didn't! / ARTHUR: You said it "looked like the BBC spent more on tea than on the sets". / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: Well, yeah, that's true... but still... / ARTHUR: "Drunk, one-armed monkeys were given hammers and told to build sets." YOUR EXACT WORDS.
Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 10 / 2005 [[Street]] / GRAMP: Well fellas, here we are! The glittering city of Lost Wages, Nevada! / ARTHUR: Lost... LOST WAGES? A-ha! Haha ha / / [[Street]] / ARTHUR: BWA HA! Ha ha ha ha ha h / / [[Street]] / ARTHUR: "Lost wages"! A hee hee hee hee / / [[Street]] / GRAMP: You're just being sarcastic, aren't you? / ARTHUR: Well spotted! 60 points for Gryffindor house, Mr. Potter...
Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 11 / 2005 [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: I'm kinda surprised you took us to Vegas, Gramp. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: You're always saying we should live a good, decent life. But Vegas is just one big sin city. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / GRAMP: And yet, among all that bad stuff, you can find one of life's greatest goods! / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / GRAMP: ...99-cent all-you-can eat shrimp. / ARTHUR: Can't... feel... feet... and yet delicious shrimp... still calling... to me...
Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 12 / 2005 [[Las Vegas]] / ARTHUR: HOW FUN WAS THAT!?! ...I just tried out this slot machine! What a blast! / / [[Las Vegas]] / ARTHUR: Man, I wish I had one of those big buckets of quarters. I could sit there playing slots all night! / / [[Las Vegas]] / ARTHUR: That's gotta be the most fun anyone could ever have! / NARRATOR: ...She's 26.
 

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