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| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 10 / 2006 | [[THE POND]] / ARTHUR: You know what movie I'm really looking forward to? Mission Impossible 3 / / [[THE POND]] / ARTHUR: ...Heh / / [[THE POND]] / SHELDON: Ha! / ARTHUR: Heh heh heh / / [[THE POND]] / SHELDON: A-heh heh heh / ARTHUR: A-HA HA HA HA ha ha ha... / NARRATOR: Tomorrow: more laughing http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060410.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 11 / 2006 | [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: Do you think I'm doing a good job raising Sheldon? / ARTHUR: What? / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: I... I just don't know how I'm DOING at this. I need my wife. I need his parents. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: They were the ones with all the parenting know-how. ...I just end up figuring it out as I go. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: I'm 65, for goodness sakes! I'm supposed to be glued to my easy chair, complaining about the news! / ARTHUR: ...If it's any consolation, that's how I'd describe your parenting style. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060411.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 12 / 2006 | [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: It's just tough raising a ten-year old. Especially when you're over-the-hill like me. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: AND he's a billionaire for Pete's sake! How do you make sound parenting decisions when the child is a billionaire?? / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: Hey Gramp? Can I buy Daimler-Chrysler? / GRAMP: What? NO...you can't! Lord no! / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: ...Seems like you're doin' a stand-up job. / GRAMP: I don't know...I don't know...maybe that would've been a good buy. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060412.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 13 / 2006 | [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: Look, I think you're doing a great job raising Sheldon. / SHELDON: What? / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: He's a good kid. / SHELDON: ...Who are you talking about? / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: I mean, yes, SURE, he's a nerd of biblical proportions... / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: ARE YOU TALKIN' ABOUT ME?!? / ARTHUR: ...And sure, he's got some anger issues from being such a gigantor nerd... . http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060413.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 14 / 2006 | [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: What were you just talking about? / GRAMP: Nothing! / ARTHUR: Nothing! ...Or maybe Voltron. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: Voltron? / ARTHUR: Um... yes. YES. Voltron. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: Like, um, what happens when you go to FORM Voltron, but one of the folks is in the can? / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: Fine. Whatever. Don't tell me what you were talking about. / ARTHUR: ...Or they're all like "We need Black Lion to form Voltron!" and he's all like "Sorry guys, it's my cousin's Bar Mitzvah today. Can't make it. / GRAMP: What? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060414.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 15 / 2006 | [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: Look, I know you didn't ask to be a parent again. But lots of stuff happens in life that we didn't ask for. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: Do you think I ASKED to be so ruggedly sexy? / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: Do you think I ASKED to be the super cute buck that makes all the lady ducks cluck? / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: A what with the who? / ARTHUR: I did, by the way. ...ASK. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060415.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 16 / 2006 | NARRATOR: VOTE FOR YOUR FAVOURITE EASTER MOMENT... / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / NARRATOR: Otherwise macho guys wearing pastel suits / ARTHUR: Well aren't you just the sweetest l'il prom king 1982 ever saw! / / [[THE HOUSE]] / NARRATOR: Memories that come rushing back when you bite into a "Peeps" / GRAMP: Ah yes! I remember well my first bite of packing foam... / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / NARRATOR: The joy of the day... expressed in a friendly Easter egg hunt / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / NARRATOR: Finding that last Easter egg... in July. / ARTHUR: PHOO! ... What smells like old people? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060416.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 17 / 2006 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: Whoa there, Li'l Britches. I say whoa! I think we done found ourselves an Easter egg. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: Waitaminute. That's not an Easter egg... sweet puckery lemon! That's a DUCK egg! / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.) (night)]] http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060417.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 18 / 2006 | [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: Hey, where's your duck? He didn't come home last night. / SHELDON: He didn't? / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: Nope. His bed's still made... the espresso machine is still clean... there are no feathers in the sink... there's no trail of spilled Cap'n Crunch on the floor... and the toaster isn't covered in crumbs. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: Sheesh. He's a little whirlwind of morning destruction, isn't he? / GRAMP: ...And I'm fairly sure that - YEP - all the cash is still in my wallet... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060418.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 19 / 2006 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060419.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 20 / 2006 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: There you are! I've been looking for you. / ARTHUR: Sittin' on the egg. Gotta sit on the egg. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: Egg? What egg? Is that YOUR egg? / ARTHUR: No. But gotta keep it warm. Gotta keep it safe. Weird instincts... kickin' in - MOTHERING instincts. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: So you've done nothing but sit here all day? / ARTHUR: Well... been reading this "Baby Gap" catalog. LOVIN' these argyle booties. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060420.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 21 / 2006 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: Look, I agree with you. A duck NEEDS a nest for their egg. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: But... you're not that in touch with your duck instincts, you know? No one's ever SHOWN you how to build a nest. / ARTHUR: What are you trying to say? / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: Most ducks don't use bean bags from Ikea. / ARTHUR: Then most ducks are chumps. This puppy was $4.99. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060421.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 22 / 2006 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: So how long is it gonna take for that egg to hatch? / ARTHUR: It's not that simple, Sheldon. You can't just ASSIGN a number to these things. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: How long does it take for a flower to TRULY bloom? For an oyster's pearl to find its hidden LUSTER? For a baby deer to take its first INSPIRED leap? / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: You have no idea, do you? / ARTHUR: NO FLIPPIN' CLUE ...two years? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060422.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 23 / 2006 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: Just imagine! Me! A daddy! To this adopted baby duck! / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: A little duck who will fly like me and quack like me and tell all the same Tom Cruise jokes I do! / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: My child will be JUST LIKE ME in every way! / (SOUND FX): CRRRACK! / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: ...Well, he has your eyes. / ARTHUR: HE HAS MY LEG, MAN! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060423.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 24 / 2006 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Man (Generic): EXCUSE ME! What... What's the date today?! / GRAMP: April 24th / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Man (Time Travler): THE YEAR, MAN! WHAT'S THE YEAR?! / NARRATOR: How to tell when you're in a bad movie about time travel. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060424.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 25 / 2006 | [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: I find it incredibly cathartic to get the gunk out from between my toes at the end of the day. It's so... meditative. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: It's a quiet time to stop and think... to consider your life and the person you want to be. In a way, keeping clean toes contributes to keeping a clean HEART. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: Listening to you is like conversational dentistry. / GRAMP: I should send my life tips to "Chicken Soup for the Soul". ...My section could be called "Getting a Toehold on Life". http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060425.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 26 / 2006 | [[THE HOUSE (Bathroom)]] / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / / [[Starbucks]] / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: I think I might have a problem. / SHELDON: I think you might have a child. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060426.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 27 / 2006 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: Man, no good deed goes unpunished. I sit on an egg in a spirit of giving, and now I have a baby lizard following me. / SHELDON: Heh heh heh ...he's cute. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: Cute as a hangnail. He's all up in my bidness. And he copies everything I do! I cough, he coughs. I blink twice, he blinks twice. It's like a bad "Three Stooges" sketch. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: You're like Larry and Moe! You just need a Curly! ...Or, um, a Shemp.
/ / ARTHUR: ...Or a JOE / SHELDON: ...Or a CURLY-Joe / ARTHUR: ...Or a GOOD LORD THIS LIST IS DEPRESSING http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060427.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 28 / 2006 | [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: Yer a lucky dude, compadre. Not many folks get to ride with REX CHESTINGTON. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: Perhaps I shall take you on as my sidekick. "Flaco" you shall be called. Flaco, the wild pistolero / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: And we shall ride like brothers, brothers from another mother / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: This is SO not the way my golden years were depicted in Metamucil commercials. / ARTHUR: No, Flaco! No one touches the hat! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060428.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 29 / 2006 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / FLACO: Ptui! / ARTHUR: No, no, NO... cowboys don't spit like that.
/ They spit with. Gusto. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: You need to imagine that the NASCAR season just got cancelled... that Budweiser is now brewed in North Korea... and that they just started filming "Punky Brewster: The Movie" / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / FLACO: hhhhHHHHHOCK... / ARTHUR: Now we're talkin' http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060429.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from April / 30 / 2006 | [[THE HOUSE]] / NARRATOR: Solitude / / [[THE HOUSE]] / NARRATOR: Cooperation / / [[THE HOUSE]] / NARRATOR: Accomplishment / / [[THE HOUSE]] / NARRATOR: Triumph / / [[THE HOUSE]] / NARRATOR: Greediness / GRAMP: No. NO. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060430.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from May / 01 / 2006 | SHELDON: Last week, rumors started swirling about a new "Star Trek" movie. Apparently, it's gonna be about the young Spock and Kirk and how they met. / ARTHUR: ....BOO. / / SHELDON: But if this movie MUST be made, we can think of only one actor who could play the YOUNG Capt. Kird... / / NARRATOR: He's tan. He's fit. He can still belt out a mean "Rocket Man"...SHATNER IN 2008 http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060501.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from May / 02 / 2006 | [[Outside (Generic: forest, trees, etc.) (Rocks)]] / ARTHUR: I'm... too sexy for my shirt... / / [[Outside (Generic: forest, trees, etc.) (Rocks)]] / ARTHUR: ... Too sexy for my shirt. So sexy...it hurts. / SHELDON: You're not wearing a shirt. / / [[Outside (Generic: forest, trees, etc.) (Rocks)]] / ARTHUR: Um, HEL-LO. I'm too se / SHELDON: ... sexy for it. GOT IT. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060502.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from May / 03 / 2006 | [[sidewalk]] / ARTHUR: That is AMAZING. This tree has totally lifted up this sidewalk. / / [[sidewalk]] / ARTHUR: That's, like, 2 or 3 HUNDRED POUNDS of cement! ...And that tree is lifting it like it's nothing! / SHELDON: It's that kind of strength that made the Ents so effective against Saruman. / / [[sidewalk]] / SHELDON: WHAT?! 'S true.... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060503.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from May / 04 / 2006 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: Whassamatter, Flaco? Why you acting weird? / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: A-ha... you see other lizards. And you wanna... yeah, yeah. Of course. Go on. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: BECAUSE! It's "American Idol"! I always cry at American Idol! / GRAMP: No you don't. Last week you said Ryan Seacrest was "foot odor, made flesh". http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060504.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from May / 05 / 2006 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: Dear God - I'm writing to ask you a favor. It's about my son, "Flaco". / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: He's off in the big, wide world now... all by himself. But... he scares easily, you know? / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: So I wanted to see if you could sorta watch out for him? Protect him from the terrors... THE HORRORS... of life? / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: Like... you know... Matthew Perry movies. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060505.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from May / 06 / 2006 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / NARRATOR: Epilogue. / ARTHUR: Once again, REX CHESTINGTON rides alone. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: Alone... like the wily coyote in the hills. Like the mountain goat on high. Like the cougar in his quiet re-pose. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: Alone... with only the wind to comfort him. With only the endless stars to guide his path. H'yah, boy! H'YAH! / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060506.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from May / 07 / 2006 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Magazine: Teen Beat / SHELDON: Amazingly, it turns out that the tongue is a pretty good organ to see with. / ARTHUR: Wait... WHAT? To see with? / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: Yeah, apparently! Research led by Dr. Bach-y-Rita has proven that blind people can "see" through their tongue. A strip of electrodes, pressed up to the tongue, can carry a camera's signal to the brain. It's not perfect, but they CAN see. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Magazine: Teen Beat / SHELDON: Even weirder... The Navy is working on a way to hook SONAR up to divers' tongues. In tests, a diver "saw" with sonar, finding an object in a pool - even with his eyes closed. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Magazine: Teen Beat / SHELDON: Theoretically, it could work with infrared, too, allowing soldiers to see in the dark with their tongue. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Magazine: Teen Beat / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: I can not stress this enough: humans scare the living *#@!! out of me. / SHELDON: The weirdest part is that the scientist's name is "Bach-y-Rita" ...is he Klingon? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060507.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from May / 08 / 2006 | [[THE HOUSE]] / NARRATOR: Today! Punctuation marks that never caught on... / ARTHUR: Yeah! I'll totally go to that party at Jim's! Jim... who... I... still... owe 300 bucks to / NARRATOR: = I was excited, but I'm rapidly losing interest / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: Um... how badly does motor oil stain / GRAMP: Why do you ask / NARRATOR: = Don't particularly want to know the answer / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: Do you think Jango Fett ever jokingly said to Boba Fett "I was the same way at your age" / NARRATOR: = I am not a huge nerd. I live a rich and full life. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060508.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from May / 09 / 2006 | [[THE HOUSE (SHELDON'S Bedroom)]] / SHELDON: Z / (SOUND FX): Klik. / / [[THE HOUSE (SHELDON'S Bedroom)]] / Alarm Clock: THE SLEEPER HAS AWAKENED! / / [[THE HOUSE (SHELDON'S Bedroom)]] / / [[THE HOUSE (SHELDON'S Bedroom)]] / ARTHUR: ...You are KIDDING me with that. / SHELDON: ...It's the official "Dune" alarm clock. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/060509.html |
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