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| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 10 / 2006 | [[Home Depot]] / GRAMP: Don't you stores have any shame?? All this Halloween candy has gotten ridiculous! / / [[Home Depot]] / sign: 6 pounds for $1 / GRAMP: There are 6 aisles of chocolate in here! / Clerk: Sir, we're just responding to the market. Lots of stores overstock on candy. / / [[Home Depot]] / GRAMP: C'mon, man! You're Home Depot for God's sake! / Clerk: Oh... well... yeah. SURE. We've still got hammers, 'n stuff. / Clerk 2: ...Chocolate ones! With caramel! ...Or nougat! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/061010.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 11 / 2006 | [[Store]] / GRAMP: You grocery stores pack Halloween candy to the rafters, thinking that the sheer volume will force us to buy some. / / [[Store]] / GRAMP: But in fact, seeing ALL THIS CANDY kind of wakes me up to the craziness of it all. I start to realize just how unhealthy this is. It has the opposite sales effect. / / [[Store]] / Cashier: Your argument might've swayed me without the 15 bags of "Snickers". / GRAMP: AHA! BUT WHAT YOU FAIL TO REALIZE IS THAT - ...yeah. Yeah... you're probably right. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/061011.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 12 / 2006 | [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: We found the Halloween candy you hid under the china cabinet. / GRAMP: Aw, dang it! I only hid that 20 minutes ago! How did you find it so fast? / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: We're 12 inches tall, man! We see things you guys don't. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: For example... SOMEONE'S boxers have been wedged under the couch since 2003. ...Such are the sights we live with. / FLACO: Brr-r-r... / GRAMP: Hey! ...THERE they are! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/061012.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 13 / 2006 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / DANTE: Check it out! Found it by the pond. / SHELDON: Heeeyyy. Good-lookin' stick. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / DANTE: Seriously, right? / SHELDON: Seriously. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: Good balance... not too barky... just the right amount of pointy bits. / DANTE: AND, I've been swinging it around for two hours ...hasn't broke. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: Man. / DANTE: Seriously. / NARRATOR: The joy of being a ten-year old boy http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/061013.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 14 / 2006 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / DANTE: Check out my sketch of Sheldon. / ARTHUR: Hmmm. It's... HMMM. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / DANTE: You don't like it? / ARTHUR: Well, you know how some cultures believe that capturing someone's likeness steals their soul? / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / DANTE: Yeah. / ARTHUR: Sheldon's soul is QUITE SAFE. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: But somewhere, a frozen blob of turkey gravy just lost its soul. / DANTE: Shoo. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/061014.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 15 / 2006 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / GRAMP: Look at your duck up there... soaring above the trees. / SHELDON: Wow... he's really high, isn't he? / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / GRAMP: He looks like some angelic being in the heavens. So smooth, so graceful as he glides in the great blue quiet. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / GRAMP: Just imagine bathing in that silence... letting it wash over you... becoming one with all of creation below. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / GRAMP: I bet he's found a transcendental peace that we can only dream of. / ARTHUR: She's a BRICK dundunDUNdun HOUSE. dundunDUNdun She MIGHTY MIGHTY she letting it all hang out... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/061015.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 17 / 2006 | [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: Dopiest car ever built. GO. / GRAMP: Ooo... um... the AMC Pacer? / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: That's everyone's go-to choice. Try again. / GRAMP: Um... how about anything ever built by Citroen? / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: It's too easy to pick on the French. Try again. / GRAMP: The 1985 Camaro T-top with the plastic rear-window slats? / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: Ooo! The choice of hillbillies everywhere! GOOD CHOICE. / GRAMP: ...Did those window slats DO anything? Besides look like plantation shutters? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/061017.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 18 / 2006 | [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: Arr, me matey! What be your thoughts on me Halloween costume? I be Cap'n Blackbeak. / GRAMP: Hey hey hey! A pirate of the Seven Seas! / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: NAY, laddybuck. I own a cozy bread and breakfast called "The Land Lubber." We be famous for our apple flapjacks. You can't eat just one!! Har Har / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: Wait. WHAT? / ARTHUR: Arr. I took the road less traveled,and that has made all the difference. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/061018.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 19 / 2006 | ARTHUR: Arr... you don't like me costume, then? / GRAMP: I DO like your costume... but it makes no sense. / / ARTHUR: Why not? I be a pirate! ...It just so happens that I own a cute little bed & breakfast in Vermont. / / GRAMP: Well then, you're not REALLY a pirate, are you? / ARTHUR: Arrrr... I steal from me guests. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/061019.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 20 / 2006 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: We've received a lot of e-mails saying that the Pontiax Aztek is, in fact, the dopiest car ever built. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: So today, we've invited Tim Wilson - the lead designer of the Aztek - to defend his vision. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: We've also invited everyone else who got their fingers into the design... like the marketing team, the cost-cutting team, the second and third re-design teams, 46 middle managers, and / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: ...Jenkers, the Pontiac janitor. / janitor: I told 'em make it look like a fridge. ...And they done did it! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/061020.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 21 / 2006 | [[On Ship]] / bucket: WATER / bucket: WATER / bucket: EVERYWHERE / NARRATOR: The rhyme of the ANCIENT mariner / Sailor: There once was a man from Nantucket... / Captain: No! NO, Jasper! Not in front of Samuel Taylor Coleridge! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/061021.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 22 / 2006 | [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: What do you think of our Halloween costumes, Gramp? / GRAMP: I only see one costume. ...Dante's not dressed. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: That's cause Dante is DANTE. ...And I'm Virgil! / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: GET IT? GET IT?? / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: Oh... and Flaco is Beatrice! / FLACO: Squee. / DANTE: I don't get it. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/061022.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 23 / 2006 | [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: You know what I love? I love folks that own large, 1930's French advertising posters in their house / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: It's says "I may not speak a lick of French, but MAN, I do know how to shop at Bed, Bath & Beyond." / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: You're a cranky little duck. / ARTHUR: "A classy poster? Heck YEAH it's a classy poster. It ain't got no English on it." http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/061023.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 24 / 2006 | [[THE HOUSE (Bathroom)]] / GRAMP: "Warning: take with food... failing to do so will cause stomach discomfort." / / [[THE HOUSE (Bathroom)]] / GRAMP: "Then, over the course of 36 minutes, that discomfort will lead to burps that smell like salmon and popcorn." / / [[THE HOUSE (Bathroom)]] / / [[THE HOUSE (Bathroom)]] / ARTHUR: There is such a thing as TOO much honesty. / GRAMP: "Do not take if currently dating." http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/061024.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 25 / 2006 | [[Store]] / sign: amples! / Woman (Generic): Sir? Would you like to try a wheat-grass shot? / GRAMP: A what with the what-what? / / [[Store]] / Woman (Generic): A wheat-grass shot. It's the equivalent of two pounds of veggies. It's the ultimate energy boost! / GRAMP: Um... ok. / / [[Store]] / (SOUND FX): thoop / / [[Store]] / Woman (Generic): ...Aaaaand, it tastes like Bea Arthur's wig. / GRAMP: Feeling... is... less... of an... energy boost... more... of a... survival instinct. Tastes like unwashed badger. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/061025.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 26 / 2006 | [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: There's a reason why so many ancient Roman buildings are still standing: they used better concrete than we do. / / GRAMP: Can you believe that? They lived 2000 YEARS AGO, and they developed concrete that's better than the stuff we use today. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: It makes you wonder... why don't we build stuff to last like that?? / ARTHUR: BECAUSE. I'm not sure we want the Pizza Hut on route 9 to still be here 2000 years from now. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/061026.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 27 / 2006 | Centurion: ... Roman, Roman, Roman, keep them doggies Roman ... Roman, Roman, Roman RAW-HIDE! / NARRATOR: He was the least-loved centurion of all, this ignoramus of Gaul. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/061027.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 28 / 2006 | [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: Pre-emptive trick-or-treat! / GRAMP: Halloween is FOUR DAYS AWAY. You can't pre-emptively trick-or-treat. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: Why not? People sometimes give birthday gifts and Christmas gifts WEEKS beforehand. / GRAMP: But Halloween is different. You need that chilly night with pumpkins aglow and costumes everywhere. You can't pre-emptively experience that just by asking for candy. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: ...You ate all the Snickers, didn't you? / GRAMP: It was a scene of tremendous violence. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/061028.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 29 / 2006 | [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: What is Flaco supposed to be? / ARTHUR: Kim Jong Il! / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: The ruler of North Korea? / ARTHUR: Yep! Awesome costume, isn't it? We're gonna get so much candy! / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: Dude, no one's gonna give candy to Kim Jong Il... he's Kim Jong Il! / ARTHUR: You just watch. We have our strategy all worked out. / / [[Front door]] / SHELDON: TRICK OR TREE - / ARTHUR: THIS MAN HAS NUKES!! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/061029.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from October / 31 / 2006 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Boy (Generic): Twick or tweet! / GRAMP: A trick please. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Boy (Generic): A... twick? / GRAMP: Yes, please. I'm trying to revive that tradition. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Boy (Generic): Ve-wy well, then. To perform my twick, I shall need one "D" battery, 600 ostrich feathers, a two-stroke motor, 16 grams of potassium chloride... and a male cheetah. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: MAN! You asked the right five-year old. / Cheetah: Mrow? / Boy (Generic): Behold! You will be-weeve that a cat can fwy! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/061031.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 01 / 2006 | [[Miscellaneous]] / SHELDON: Trade ya..... Any candy you got, for my "Sweetarts". / DANTE: Sweetarts? A-ha-ha-ha no. / / [[Miscellaneous]] / ARTHUR: No. / / [[Miscellaneous]] / OSO: Grrr... / FLACO: Squee / / [[Miscellaneous]] / GRAMP: All I have is a sheet of lint from the clothes dryer. / SHELDON: Done. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/061101.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 02 / 2006 | [[THE HOUSE]] / Newspaper: DAILY NE -
/ Sheldon is moving! / GRAMP: No...., I won't. ...And just so you know: anytime the question is "Can you roll me toward my candy," the answer is no. / ARTHUR: MMMF. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/061102.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 03 / 2006 | [[THE HOUSE (generic room)]] / ARTHUR: SHELDON! HELP! I'M STUCK! / / [[THE HOUSE (generic room)]] / ARTHUR: During the night, I rolled over onto a "Reese's Peanut Butter Cup." And... And... while I slept on it, the combination of heat and pressure turned it into some super-strong glue. I can't move! / / [[THE HOUSE (generic room)]] / ARTHUR: But c'mon - pretty rad scientific discovery, eh?!? / SHELDON: Yes, you're like a fat little Madame Curie. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/061103.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 04 / 2006 | [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: I'm kind of amazing, when you think about it. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: Even when I'm ASLEEP, I do amazing things... like discover adhesive properties in candy. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: Your most amazing discovery is that a duck can weigh 65 POUNDS and not explode. / ARTHUR: 66! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/061104.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 05 / 2006 | ARTHUR: Now that I've lost weight, I think I understand why Jabba the Hutt was such a grump. / / ARTHUR: Growing up, he was probably just like all the other Hutts at Hutt High School... chatting up the Hutt cheerleaders... looking for a date to Hutt prom. / / ARTHUR: But you know what? Our boy liked to eat. TOO MUCH. And as he got heavier, them Hutt cheerleaders weren't so nice. / / ARTHUR: And so Jabba was all, like, "To Heck with this! I'm gonna become an intergalactic crimelord!" / / ARTHUR: "And I ain't gonna let no THIN Jedi play no mind tricks on ME. AND... I'm gonna eat as many of these little frogs as I want. That's how I roll, Susie the Hutt..." http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/061105.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 07 / 2006 | [[Grocery Store]] / GRAMP: Sir? Your digital pen keeps garbling my credit card signature. / Clerk: Year, it's been brooken all week. / / [[Grocery Store]] / GRAMP: But...I can't pay then. / Clerk: Sure you can. Just click "Accept." / / [[Grocery Store]] / GRAMP: No! It's a credit card purchase! / Clerk: Dude, I get paid 5 bucks an hour, you're buying paper towels, and no one really cares. Just click "Accept". / / [[Grocery Store]] / ARTHUR: Good to see the system works! / GRAMP: I "signed" with two cuss words. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/061107.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 08 / 2006 | [[Coffee Shop]] / Clerk: Can I interest you in a "Pumpkin Latte," sir? / GRAMP: A what? / / [[Coffee Shop]] / Clerk: A Pumpkin Latte! It's got all the rich coffee flavor you love... mixed with a large, orange, oddly tasting gourd! / / [[Coffee Shop]] / GRAMP: MAN. You guys are REALLY running out of drink ideas. / Clerk: RICK! I have a BBQ Chicken Latte for RICK! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/061108.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 09 / 2006 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / GRAMP: You seen this show "Heroes" ? / SHELDON: Yeah. Someone essentially stole the concept of X-Men and pitched it to a network. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / GRAMP: It's about these humans who are, well... mutated, I guess? And they all have super powers. / SHELDON: X-Men. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / GRAMP: And they want to be heroes with their powers, but society might fear them... so they stay hidden. / SHELDON: X-MEN! / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Arrow: Brain about to explode / GRAMP: Wouldn't it be cool if one character could, like, wave his hand, and, like, lift a whole metal bus? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/061109.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 10 / 2006 | [[The House]] / SHELDON: Hey - that's not Dr. Who! It's a totally different dude! / ARTHUR: Well, YEAH... They had to change actors this season. It's a new Dr. Who. / / [[The House]] / SHELDON: Whoa whoa WHOA. You can't just replace an actor and pretend no one noticed. / ARTHUR: They don't. The show developed a whole mythology to explain why he changes looks. / / [[The House]] / / [[The House]] / SHELDON: Man, that is so supremely weak-sauce. / ARTHUR: Leave it to the BBC to write its way out of low budgets. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/061110.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 11 / 2006 | [[The House]] / GRAMP: The Japanese company N.E.C. has a robot that can "taste" wine. / ARTHUR: Slap my mouth. / / GRAMP: No, it's true! It can even recommend a complementary cheese. / ARTHUR: WOW. You know who's out of luck, if that's true? / / NARRATOR: Elsewhere... / Frenchman 1: Zis robot! She eez an out-a-rage to the Franch peoples! / Frenchman 2: Wine tasting was our last claim to fame! Now what will we be known for?? "...Complaining"?? / Frenchman 3: Oui...Oui... We shall always have zat. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/061111.html |
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