You're browsing the archives of Sheldon.
You can search these comics too.
show: [ full transcriptions | abridged transcriptions | just the first line ]
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 07 / 2002 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / SHELDON: Worked out for the first time today... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020807.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 08 / 2002 | [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: Can't... / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: Reach... / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: Aspirin... / SHELDON: Worked out for the first time yesterday. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020808.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 09 / 2002 | ARTHUR: Cool!! This book of names says Arthur means "BOLD" / SHELDON: What does it say for Sheldon? / / ARTHUR: Sez here that Sheldon means "Deep Valley". / / / ARTHUR: I MEAN BOLD!! SHELDON MEANS BOLD, TOO! / SHELDON: "Deep Valley"? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020809.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 10 / 2002 | [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: GRAMP! GRAMP! Come quick! We've been robbed! / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: All my stuff! It's all gone! / GRAMP: Relax. I just cleaned your room. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: My carpet's blue? / GRAMP: Apparently. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020810.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 12 / 2002 | [[Aboard the Titanic]] / SHELDON: I'm king of the world! / / [[Aboard the Titanic (sinking)]] / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / ARTHUR: Oh don't be so dramatic. / SHELDON: I'm tellin' ya, that's how my stocks feel lately. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020812.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 13 / 2002 | GRAMP: I heard about your bad day at the stock market. The duck told me you lost 98 billion. / / GRAMP: I just want you to know that you can always pick up extra money by doing a few chores around the house. / / SHELDON: I'M STILL WORTH 40 BILLION. / GRAMP: ... Or you could recycle those soda cans behind the garage! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020813.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 14 / 2002 | [[THE POND]] / SHELDON: I lost 98 billion on the stock market today, Dante. / / SHELDON: I can't believe it...it just went "poof" in one day. / DANTE: HOO-BOY, I hear ya. I lost a quarter down a storm drain yesterday. / / / ARTHUR: I would've slapped him. / SHELDON: It took everything I had. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020814.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 15 / 2002 | DANTE: So what is this “stock market” thing, anyway? / GRAMP: It’s a place to buy and sell company stock. / / GRAMP: …And “stocks” are little pieces of paper that say how much of the company you own! / / GRAMP: Well, no, no one actually gets the little papers anymore. Anyway, your stock value is based on the company’s honestly-reported earnings. / / GRAMP: Well, no,… They don’t do that anymore either. …I don’t know what the stock market is. / DANTE: ? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020815.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 16 / 2002 | [[Sheldonsoft (meeting room)]] / NARRATOR: The company gathers to hear the first press conference from its 10-year old C.E.O. / / [[Sheldonsoft (meeting room)]] / NARRATOR: Though rumors are rampant, no one knows what such a young C.E.O. will say. / / [[Sheldonsoft (meeting room)]] / / [[Sheldonsoft (meeting room)]] / NARRATOR: Ground breaking stuff, no doubt. / SHELDON: ... Can I get a stool here? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020816.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 17 / 2002 | [[Sheldonsoft (meeting room)]] / SHELDON: Sheldonsoft employees... Today I come before you to talk about our 62% decline in stock value. / / [[Sheldonsoft (meeting room)]] / SHELDON: We can't let our lives get bogged down in " pecentages ". Life is more than silly numbers. / / [[Sheldonsoft (meeting room)]] / SHELDON: Let's be honest here. What does a 62% drop really MEAN to us, anyway? / / [[Sheldonsoft (meeting room)]] / Jim: UM... ABOUT 98 BILLION DOLLARS. / SHELDON: Yes, Thank you, Jim from accounting. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020817.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 19 / 2002 | GRAMP: That stock market is a funny thing.
/ I've always thought of it as a mother bird trying to feed her young. / / GRAMP: Each baby wants a worm, but Momma just keeps bringing sandwiches.
/ And the whole time, a barbershop quartet sings in the background. / / SHELDON: Uh... is this metaphor going anywhere? / GRAMP: ...and then a DRAGON with tennis shoes flies in... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020819.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 20 / 2002 | SHELDON: I... I saw one today. / DANTE: Saw what? / / SHELDON: On T.V... I saw it. It was horrible. / DANTE: What? WHAT? / / SHELDON: A "Back to School" ad. / / DANTE: Every.... Everything's gone BLACK! / SHELDON: Pray with me, Dante. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020820.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 21 / 2002 | [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: Because my future is set in terms of income, I’ve decided not to go to school anymore. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: I can disregard learning altogether. My income is guaranteed. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: Who do you think you are?!? A NATIONAL-CHAMPIONSHIP COLLEGE FOOTBALL TEAM?!? / ARTHUR: Ooo! That is SO cutting on SO many levels… http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020821.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 22 / 2002 | [[THE POND]] / SHELDON: Gramp says I still have to go to school, even though I’m a billionare… …And I think I see why. / / [[THE POND]] / SHELDON: He says that money shouldn’t make me feel superior. …That no amount of money makes you a better person. / / [[THE POND]] / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: Sometimes I doubt you’re an American. / GRAMP: Oh, not YOU now… http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020822.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 23 / 2002 | [[THE POND]] / SHELDON: We should look on the bright side. There are GOOD THINGS about going back to school. / DANTE: Oh yeah? Such as WHAT? / / [[THE POND]] / SHELDON: Well... / / [[THE POND]] / / [[THE POND]] / (SOUND FX): KICK! / / [[THE POND]] / SHELDON: KING OF THE ROCK! / DANTE: ...You couldn't think of ONE, could you?! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020823.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 24 / 2002 | SHELDON: I'm a BILLIONAIRE, Dante - yet I still enjoy coloring.... with crayons. / / SHELDON: Do you think there's something WRONG WITH ME? / DANTE: First of all, I think it's wonderful you can tell me this as a friend - / / DANTE: Secondly, I'm now going to laugh at you. / / DANTE: HA HA ha HA HA / SHELDON: ...So that's a "yes" then? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020824.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 26 / 2002 | GRAMP: It says here that the state of North Dakota is having image problems, so they're thinking of changing the name to just "Dakota". / / ARTHUR: Wow! So how do they legally make a name-change like that? Do the five people living in North Dakota vote on it? / / GRAMP: Comments like that don't help their image problem, you know... / ARTHUR: Oh, I'll send all five an apology. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020826.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 27 / 2002 | [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: North Dakota is having image problems? / ARTHUR: Yep. They're even thinking of changing their name. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: Wow... That sounds pretty desperate. / ARTHUR: Yep. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: YA KNOWWW... My company buys out failing corporations all the time in order to save them... / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: OH NO YOU DON'T / SHELDON: Where's my checkbook? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020827.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 28 / 2002 | [[Inside (non-specific)]] / SHELDON: Action Fun Land? / DANTE: Land of the Hip? / SHELDON: Super Happy Fun Land? / DANTE: Fabulous Land? / GRAMP: Hey fellas... whatcha doin'? / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / DANTE: ... Deciding what to rename North Dakota when Sheldon buys it! / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / GRAMP: WHY do I ask? / SHELDON: Oo... Heyyy... How about "The Kingdom of Sheldonia"? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020828.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 29 / 2002 | [[Inside (non-specific)]] / GRAMP: Pretty rough article about you in today's paper. / SHELDON: Really? / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / GRAMP: Apparently the governor of North Dakota had some harsh words about you "buying" the state.
/ ... Check out this quote. / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / Text: "This boy-billionaire's bizarre, half-baked buyout plan is brain-dead at best." / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / SHELDON: Oooo... Why, I am HIGHLY TEMPTED to pay less than the asking price now... / GRAMP: Pretty impressive alliteration, tho'. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020829.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 30 / 2002 | [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: It turns out I can't buy North Dakota / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: APPARENTLY There are a dozen state and federal laws against it. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: Hmph. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: I blame the constitution. / GRAMP: ...Good to see you're reacting rationally. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020830.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from August / 31 / 2002 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: So what if you can't buy North Dakota? You just gotta tell yourself, it WASN'T MEANT TO BE. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: It's like...like the Sun setting in the East...like water flowing uphill. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: Hmmm.... / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / ARTHUR: ...Like Carmen Electra ever asking me out on a da--- / SHELDON: YES. GOT IT. THANKS. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020831.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from September / 02 / 2002 | [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: You know, with Sheldon back at school, it's just us bachelors around the house... / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: This could be our opportunity for mature, adult pastimes. / ARTHUR: Ooo! Sounds saucy! What do you have in mind? / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: BOOO! / GRAMP: White goes first. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020902.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from September / 03 / 2002 | [[THE HOUSE]] / NARRATOR: It's his first game of chess, and he's starting to sweat. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / NARRATOR: And as he plays, it gets worse and worse. The sweat drips - No, POURS off him. Finally, HE SNAPS!! / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: WILL YOU TURN OFF THAT *#@!! SPACE-HEATER... / GRAMP: Goodness... did I leave that on?? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020903.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from September / 04 / 2002 | [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: Knight takes rook ...and uses lasers. / GRAMP: What? / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: Knight takes rook... and uses MASSIVE LASER CANNONS! / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: ZAP! ZAP! And the once mighty rook is reduced to ashes! / (SOUND FX): bap! / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: Gonna be a long game. / ARTHUR: Ooo! But the Bishop has readied tactical nukes! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020904.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from September / 05 / 2002 | [[Inside (non-specific)]] / NARRATOR: TODAY: "A phrase never before uttered during a game of chess" / GRAMP: No, no, no!! Once you place your chess piece, you can't pick it up and wave it around! / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / GRAMP: It's just bad form. / / [[Inside (non-specific)]] / ARTHUR: But... my rook got stuck up my nose again... / NARRATOR: DID YOU CATCH IT? "Never before uttered during a game of chess." http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020905.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from September / 06 / 2002 | [[THE HOUSE]] / NARRATOR: Chess is a game of SUSPENSE. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / NARRATOR: Suspense so thick, you could cut it with a knife. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / / [[THE HOUSE]] / NARRATOR: Yes sir! You won't find suspense like THIS anywhere else! / ARTHUR: C'mon already! I'm on chapter ten!! / GRAMP: Hey. Don't rush me... http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020906.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from September / 07 / 2002 | [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: FINE! GREAT! I didn't want to win this dumb game anyway! / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: ...You can take your checkmate and stick it up your Walla-Walla Washington! / / [[THE HOUSE]] / SHELDON: But Arthur, he hasn't won yet. / ARTHUR: ...Just practicing. / GRAMP: "My Walla-Walla Washington"? http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020907.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from September / 09 / 2002 | [[THE POND]] / (SOUND FX): KA-PLOONK / / [[THE POND]] / / [[THE POND]] / (SOUND FX): KA-PLOONK / / [[THE POND]] / SHELDON: That's gotta be the most satisfying sound in the world. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020909.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from September / 10 / 2002 | [[THE POND]] / / [[THE POND]] / (SOUND FX): KA-SPLOOSH / / [[THE POND]] / SHELDON: I take it back. THAT was the most satisfying sound in the world. / DANTE: HEY! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/020910.html |
Archive Page:
<< 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20
21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40
41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60
61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80
81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100
101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 >>