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| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 02 / 2009 | [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: / GRAMP: I just did all the dishes yesterday. And yet today… had to do 'em all again. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: It's weird: no matter how spotlessly you wash dishes… next day, you're washin' 'em all again. / ARTHUR: You're talking about this like you've stumbled on some ancient koan of wisdom. / / [[THE HOUSE]] / GRAMP: "Dishes: they need doin' " / ARTHUR: Yes. Great. Awesome. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/091102.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 03 / 2009 | [[pond]] / wooden sword: / boat: / SHELDON: ok, so you be king harold II of england, and i'll be william the conqueror / DANTE: wait, WHAT? "the conqueror"? / / [[pond]] / wooden sword: / boat: / SHELDON: yeah, that was his name / DANTE: well, I don't wanna play, then. It's pretty obvious who's gonna win THAT battle / / [[pond]] / wooden sword: / boat: / SHELDON: not necessarily. you could still win. / DANTE: against a dude named THE CONQUEROR / / [[pond]] / wooden sword: / boat: / SHELDON: c'mon.' what do you want me to do? I can't change his name. / DANTE: FINE. then I'm "harold the surprisingly unconquerable" http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/091103.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 04 / 2009 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: And what are you supposed to be? / ARTHUR: I'm a Roman Centurion. I'm here to help Harold stop this "Norman conquest." / DANTE: Ha ha / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: No, no, no. This is the year 1066. There are no Romans in England in 1066. / ARTHUR: How do YOU know? Remember how those Japanese soldiers walked out of the jungle in the 1960's, asking if WWII was over? Maybe somethin' like that happened here. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / SHELDON: The Roman Empire fell 500 years before the Norman conquest. / ARTHUR: We Romans are a patient folk. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/091104.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 05 / 2009 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / wooden sword: / SHELDON: Villain! Today you shall feel the cold bite of my sword! / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / wooden sword: / DANTE: I think NOT, fiend! For I am unstoppable in battle! / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / wooden sword: / SHELDON: Oh, you cannot GUESS at the thrashing you're about to receive! / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / wooden sword: / DANTE: Then let the battle begin! For nothing can stop me! / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / wooden sword: / SHELDON: (wiff wiff) / DANTE: (wiff wiff) / NARRATOR: 28 feet apart http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/091105.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 06 / 2009 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / wooden sword: / SHELDON: / DANTE: In this conflict, we have crossed a channel that was not meant to be crossed. …For I am defeated. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / DANTE: Indeed, this battle has left me hastings. All my Anglos have been Saxoned. / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / DANTE: You, sir, have Normaned my conquest. / SHELDON: ...Stoppp. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/091106.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 07 / 2009 | [[Space (Outside view of the Machito)]] / Spaceship: It looks like we've lost the battle cruisers
/ Mr. Cruz, bring Nosh up to the bridge. / / [[The Machito]] / Nosh: What an honor, little friend! You are being escorted by the head of engineering HIMSELF! / Skitter: The HEAD of engineering? This dude's like 13. / Fernando ('Nando): 14 / / [[The Machito]] / Skitter: So, ...what... you like wicked-smart or soemthin'? / Fernando ('Nando): No no NO no no. I'm .... FAMILIA. / / [[The Machito]] / Skitter: FAMILIA? What familia? / Nosh: THE Familia! The royal familia! Only they are allowed into ship's ring. Only they can work on the drive. / Fernando ('Nando): Yep. Just the 1,200 of us. / / [[The Machito]] / Skitter: 1,200? But there's thousands of drive ships in the armada. / Fernando ('Nando): ...and THAT's the heart-warming story of how a 14-year old came to be an engineer.
/ c'MON. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/091107.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 08 / 2009 | [[Jabba's palace]] / Jabba the Hutt: ANDOBA NE LAPPEE, KOLKA. BULOVA NUMA TOFFA. GEEB MI WA CHIMPA. INKABUNGA! / Bib Fortuna: THE MIGHT JABBA SAYS THAT - um
/ oh God oh God I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT LANGUAGE THAT IS.
/ WHY DID I TAKE THIS JOB??
/ ...dang car payments http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/091108.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 09 / 2009 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / tie: / ARTHUR: Well HELLLLO Dapper Dan. What's with the tie? / SHELDON: Goin' in to the office, today. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / tie: / ARTHUR: / SHELDON: I realized I haven't been to Sheldonsoft in months. Haven't called to see how it's going. Haven't e-mailed. Haven't done anything. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / tie: / SHELDON: / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / tie: / ARTHUR: You're asking a lot of that tie. / SHELDON: ...Does it say "Oh my gosh! Guys! Wow! I take this company super seriously!" / Wow! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/091109.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 10 / 2009 | [[Sheldonsoft]] / Podium: / SHELDON: Ladies and Gentlemen of Sheldonsoft: We're facing tough times. Tough times. / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / Podium: / SHELDON: We're staring down the deepest recession since the 1930's. And if you've read Rogoff and Reinhart's book,"This Time is Different," which looks at the similarities of financial crises over 800 years, then you know we have two more years to go - on average - before we recover our income levels, and THREE years before unemployment starts to recover. / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / Podium: / SHELDON: But perhaps, my friends, perhaps we can face our future by calling on the wisdom of greater minds. / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / Podium: / SHELDON: I believe Han Solo said it best when he said- / ARTHUR: (interupting Sheldon) STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/091110.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 11 / 2009 | [[office]] / Fax machine: / ARTHUR: / SHELDON: Is that...is that a fax machine in our corporate offices?? A FAX MACHINE? / / [[office]] / Fax machine: / SHELDON: What is this, the Reagan years? Why are we still using this machine? / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Fax machine: / SHELDON: No one has EVER successfully sent a fax on the first try. So let's be the first company to stop usin' 'em! COMPLETELY! / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Fax machine: / ARTHUR: I don't know that we can do that. / SHELDON: Nope! Gotta keep using everything ever invented ...company break everyone! We're watchin' Magnum P.I. on Betamax! It's 1985 forever. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/091111.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 12 / 2009 | [[Sheldonsoft]] / Sheldonsoft employee: but sir: for lots of folks, sending a fax is better than sending an email or a PDF.
/ / SHELDON: Better? BETTER? / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / SHELDON: first you clear a paper jam, which causes it to spit out 18 junk faxes it had back in the queue. THEN you gotta replace the ink cartridge. Then another paper jam.
/ / Sheldonsoft employee: But sir, you're missing the true joy of an office fax machine. / / [[Sheldonsoft]] / Sheldonsoft employee: ...Reading all the delicious banking and real estate faxes that co-workers leave in the machine / SHELDON: ...By the way, Jim got CREAMED in his condo refinance. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/091112.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 13 / 2009 | [[Sheldonsoft (Hallway)]] / Fax machine: / paper: / SHELDON: Stop. Right. There. I clearly said "no more faxes at sheldonsoft" / / Sheldonsoft employee: but sir! the federal government only accepts signatures via fax, not e-mail. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / paper: / Sheldonsoft employee: / SHELDON: so what! what do they need our signatures for?
/ Oh. A purchase order. How much of our software are they buyin... / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / paper: / SHELDON: / Sheldonsoft employee: / / [[nonspecific (white and black background)]] / Fax machine: / paper: http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/091113.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 14 / 2009 | [[Outer Space]] / Spaceship: / / [[Outer Space]] / Planet: / Moon: / / [[Outer Space]] / Planet: / Moon: / Spaceship: / Spaceship: / / [[Outer Space]] / Planet: / Moon: / Spaceship: / Spaceship: http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/091114.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 15 / 2009 | [[Sheldonsoft (Sheldon's Office)]] / Desk: / Chair: / Laptop: / SHELDON: Arthur, have you seen my flash drive? All my files were on it. / ARTHUR: No But maybe it's in the cloud. Did you check the cloud? / / [[Sheldonsoft (Sheldon's Office)]] / Desk: / Chair: / Laptop: / SHELDON: It's not on the cloud. It was only on my flash drive. / ARTHUR: How do you know? Maybe it is in the cloud. You gotta check the cloud. / / [[Sheldonsoft (Hallway)]] / SHELDON: Do you even know what you're saying when you say "the cloud"? Do you know what the cloud is? / ARTHUR: Sure. It's. F... / / [[Sheldonsoft (Hallway)]] / [[Sheldonsoft]] / SHELDON: / ARTHUR: Fl... / / [[Sheldonsoft (Hallway)]] / SHELDON: Don't say fluffy. / ARTHUR: fluffy http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/091115.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 16 / 2009 | [[Office Breakroom]] / Coffee Cup: / Coffee maker: / Microwave: / refridgerator: / NARRATOR: Guide to (your) office breakroom. Coffee cups include weird castoffs like "World's Best Stenographer" / NARRATOR: Let us never speak of the microwave. / NARRATOR: Off brand "Drinker's Choice"TM can survive a direct hydrogen bomb. Can NOT survive contact with sunlight or water. / NARRATOR: Two identical tupperwear bowls. One is your lunch. The other, an unspeakable horror from 18 months ago. Do you risk opening the wrong one? / NARRATOR: The one decent lunch in the whole fridge. (Will be stolen by 11AM) / NARRATOR: Unusual assortment of leftover condiments like "Bay-Leaf Marmalade" or "Sour Elderberry Dipping Sauce" http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/091116.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 17 / 2009 | [[office]] / ARTHUR: Some of your employees are really abusing the "sick days" policy. / SHELDON: How so? / / [[office]] / SHELDON: / ARTHUR: They're super quick to use sick days if they need to meet a plumber or electrician at the house. / Post-it Note: I'll be sick between 10 and 3 / / [[office]] / SHELDON: / ARTHUR: And they'll take a sick day if their ol' college buddy's gonna be in town for a day. / Post-it Note: I'm sooooper sick (tomorrow) / / [[office]] / ARTHUR: But they never take a sick day when they're actually sick. Always tryin' to save up sick days. / Employee: I'mm nod 'thick. I jud 'thound 'thick / SHELDON: ...Please don't hand me that file. / / [[office]] / ARTHUR: It's amazing what some are doing to save up days. / Employee: Gettin' some outpatient surgery in my cube. / SHELDON: awesome. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/091117.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 18 / 2009 | [[break room]] / coffee pot: / fridge: / ARTHUR: / SHELDON: I don't like that my company only gives out stimulants in the break room. / / [[break room]] / SHELDON: Coffee, tea, soda, Red Bull... We're basically giving them drugs to work faster. / ARTHUR: What's your alternative? Glass of warm milk? / / [[break room]] / SHELDON: Look, I'm just saying I feel weird that we're. / ARTHUR: Heaping plate o'turkey, folks! Dig in! We injected it with extra tryptophan! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/091118.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 19 / 2009 | [[Mailbox]] / Letter: / GRAMP: / Letter: Dear occupant: We know you get solicited by all sorts of charities, and that it's hard to tell the well-run ones from the shifty ones. / / [[Mailbox]] / Letter: / GRAMP: / Letter: Don't you wish there was a way to know which charities are ACTUALLY funding their cause? And that your donations aren't just covering overhead and executive salaries? / / [[Mailbox]] / Letter: / GRAMP: / Letter: If only there were some way to tell that their operating expenses are way too high. If only there was some hint that very little of your donated money gets to the cause itself. / / [[Mailbox]] / Letter: / GRAMP: / Letter: In any case, here's 100,000 mailing labels with your name on 'em. Please donate. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/091119.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 20 / 2009 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Tree: / Bird: Tweet / FLACO: Squee / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Tree: / Bird: T...wee? / FLACO: SQUEE / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Tree: / Bird: Twee. TWEE! / FLACO: SQUEE / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Tree: / Bird: ...twee? / FLACO: sk! SK! SQUEE! SK! sk sk sk sk http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/091120.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 21 / 2009 | [[Continuum ship]] / [[Space]] / Screen: / Continuum pilot: Human. 48 aboard. / Continuum captain: Pursue and intercept. ...The Lesser will stay behind. / / [[Continuum ship]] / [[Space]] / / [[Continuum ship]] / Continuum pilot: Clear / Continuum captain: Very well. Fire the Spirit. / / [[Continuum ship (Firing warp drive)]] / [[Space]] / / [[Space]] http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/091121.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 22 / 2009 | [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Tree: / Bird: tweet / FLACO: squee / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Tree: / Bird: twee? / FLACO: "squee" / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Tree: / Bird: twee! / FLACO: ssss Squee / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Tree: / Bird: s-twee / FLACO: SQUEE / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Tree: / Bird: squee / FLACO: SQUEE? / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Tree: / Bird: SQUEE / FLACO: SQUEE! / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Tree: / FLACO: / Bird: squee! Squaw! Squaw! / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Tree: / Bird: / FLACO: / / [[OUTSIDE (Generic: forest, trees, etc.)]] / Tree: / Bird: ...squee? / FLACO: Squee. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/091122.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 23 / 2009 | [[THE HOUSE (Living room)]] / X-box: / SHELDON: You beat the game ALREADY? / ARTHUR: Took me all weekend but, yep, I did it. / / [[THE HOUSE (Living room)]] / X-box: / SHELDON: Wow. done in two days. / ARTHUR: ...But now I'm thinking "What a huge waste of time" I just used up 48 hours...and what do I have to show for it? / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / ARTHUR: At the end of my life, with my loved ones around me, will I look back on this weekend and REGRET the things I didn't do? / / [[THE HOUSE]] / Bed: / ducks (not Arthur): / ARTHUR: I...should've... tried...playing it co-op. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/091123.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 24 / 2009 | [[Furniture World]] / SHELDON: How does this couch coos $900?!? This is a $5 couch, tops. / / [[Furniture World]] / Couch: / SHELDON: I mean seriously, who buys a zebra couch? / GRAMP: Clearly someone does. / / [[Furniture World]] / Couch: / SHELDON: / ARTHUR: Saaaay... / GRAMP: I suppose it's supply and demand at work. They couldn't charge $900 for this unless there was some idiot who thought-. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/091124.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 25 / 2009 | [[Kitchen Doorway]] / GRAMP: I left the kitchen for TWO DANG SECONDS and my bowl of ice cream is gone. / ARTHUR: huh. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / GRAMP: Oh. Yeah. "huh" I WONDER who did it. I wonder who could do such a thing. / ARTHUR: ...well don't look at me. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / GRAMP: You sayin' you didn't eat it? / ARTHUR: No I'm saying "Don't look at me." ...my poker face is terrible. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/091125.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 26 / 2009 | [[Kitchen]] / Bowl: / SHELDON: I've been sent in to ask you what THAT is? / GRAMP: Green Bean Casserole. You boys are going to love it. / / [[Kitchen (near Counter)]] / SHELDON: It's beans? What's the white goop it's sitting in? / GRAMP: Cream of Mushroom Soup / SHELDON: And the crusty bits on top? / GRAMP: Fried onions / / [[Kitchen Doorway]] / FLACO: / SHELDON: It's a vegetable, sitting in fungus, sprinkled with fried root bulb. / ARTHUR: The road to desert is paved with nasty. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/091126.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 27 / 2009 | [[THE HOUSE (at the table)]] / ARTHUR: WAN / / [[THE HOUSE (at the table)]] / ARTHUR: WAN MAH / / [[THE HOUSE (at the table)]] / ARTHUR: WAN MAH BEEZA / / [[THE HOUSE]] / ARTHUR: WAN MAH BEEZA BIE / GRAMP: You've had enough dang pie. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/091127.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 28 / 2009 | [[Living Room]] / TV: / ARTHUR: Why are you all Captain Smiles? / SHELDON: Twilight Zone marathon! All weekend long! / / [[Living Room]] / ARTHUR: Seriously? And you're gonna watch it? / SHELDON: MaraTHON! / / [[Living Room]] / ARTHUR: You already own the entire series on dvd / SHELDON: MaraTHONNN! / / [[Living Room]] / ARTHUR: You could watch ANY of these episodes ANY time you want! And without commercials! / SHELDON: * / / [[Living Room]] / SHELDON: marathonnnnn http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/091128.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 29 / 2009 | [[THE HOUSE (On the roof)]] / ARTHUR: Hey! What are you doin' up here? I never see you up here! / GRAMP: I'm hangin' Christmas lights. / / [[THE HOUSE (On the roof)]] / ARTHUR: Well, welcome to the roof, my friend! You've come to where the flavor lives! / GRAMP: …The flavor lives on the roof? / / [[THE HOUSE (On the roof)]] / ARTHUR: It's gotta live somewhere! …Sit a spell! Put your feet up! Life is less rush-rush up here. / GRAMP: When is your life ever rush-rush? / / [[THE HOUSE (On the roof)]] / ARTHUR: Breathe in that fresh, rooftop air! It's intoxicating! / GRAMP: It might be. We're right next to the dryer vent. / / [[THE HOUSE (On the roof)]] / GRAMP: / ARTHUR: And check out the view! It's amazing! / / [[THE HOUSE (On the roof)]] / ARTHUR: / GRAMP: / / [[THE HOUSE (On the roof)]] / ARTHUR: Go on! You're thinkin' it! "I can see my house from here!" / GRAMP: Guhhh. http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/091129.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from November / 30 / 2009 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Sheet of paper: / NARRATOR: AN OPEN LETTER TO THOSE CONSIDERING AN E-BOOK THIS SEASON
/ You've read all about them, and you've tried one or two, and you're starting to think, "Should I get one, too?" we're speaking of e-books, this year's new pet rock! They're selling like hotcakes-there's so few in stock! There's the Kindle! The Reader! The Nook!...And nine more! (But the nine are small Taiwanese brands you'll ignore) / SHELDON: "The book-good 9xl?" who makes this? / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / NARRATOR: So which one to get? Which one do you choose? With format wars looming, there's a chance you could lose! It could be a trap, like the beta machine: choose the wrong system, and you'll burst out a spleen. There's no doubt ol' print is going kaput but you'd hate to be caught on the wrong foot. You could spend all this cash on one big shopping day...Just to find that the market went a whole 'nuther way! / SHELDON: Like a "Zune" of books. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Night stand: / NARRATOR: Will the Kindle win out? Will the Reader? The Nook? Surely one must win out in the race of e-books. Rest assured of one thing, as you stress about this...An unfortunate truth that you might've missed: REGARDLESS OF WHICH ONE YOU THINK YOU LOVE MORE, IN TWO YEARS IT'LL BE SHOVED TO THE BACK OF A DRAWER.
/ AKA: The land of forgotten Palm Pilots http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/091130.html |
| Sheldon Comics comic strip from December / 01 / 2009 | [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Chair: / cake: / GRAMP: / ARTHUR: There's a star called VY Canis Majoris / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Chair: / cake: / GRAMP: / ARTHUR: And this star is SO HUGE, that if you put it in our solar system, it's edge would extend past Saturn's orbit. Sh huge, that it would take eight days for light to cross it's circumference! / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Chair: / cake: / ARTHUR: / GRAMP: wow. / / [[nonspecific (white background)]] / Chair: / GRAMP: I can't even conceive of - / ARTHUR: FLACEO! NOW! / FLACO: thwip! http://sheldoncomics.com/archive/091201.html |
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