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| Achewood - October 11, 2004 | [[Ray on the phone]]
/ Ray: Hey Teodor! You get that homemade salsa I FedEx'd you? / [[Teodor on the phone, looking at a FedEx package]]
/ Teodor: Yeah, it just showed up. I can't believe you used FedEx. I could have just walked over and tasted it and saved you the fifty bucks. / Ray: Aw, ain't no thang!... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10112004 |
| Achewood - October 11, 2004 | [[Ray on the phone]]
/ Ray: Hey Teodor! You get that homemade salsa I FedEx'd you? / [[Teodor on the phone, looking at a FedEx package]]
/ Teodor: Yeah, it just showed up. I can't believe you used FedEx. I could have just walked over and tasted it and saved you the fifty bucks. / Ray: Aw, ain't no thang!... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10112004 |
| Achewood - October 11, 2005 | Ray: Hey Roast Beef! Who do you think does the best somersault, you or m--- / Ray: Dang, man! A Jehovah's Witness! Let me get the hose. / Ray: THE HOSE! http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10112005 |
| Achewood - October 11, 2005 | Ray: Hey Roast Beef! Who do you think does the best somersault, you or m--- / Ray: Dang, man! A Jehovah's Witness! Let me get the hose. / Ray: THE HOSE! / {{Once Ray has given you 'The Hose,' you really can't make any headway with him.}} http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10112005 |
| Achewood - October 11, 2005 | Ray: Hey Roast Beef! Who do you think does the best somersault, you or m--- / [[ He sees Milklin.]]
/ Ray: Dang, man! A Jehovah's Witness! Let me get the hose. / [[ Ray stands in front of Milklin]] / [[Ray forcefully shoves Milklin with both hands. ]]
/ Ray: THE HOSE! / {{Once Ray has given you 'The... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10112005 |
| Achewood - October 11, 2005 | [[The reader sees Ray from the waist up]] Ray: Hey Roast Beef! Who do you think does the best somersault, you or m--- / [[Ray puts his hands on his hips and stares disdainfully at Milklin while Roast Beef looks on.]] Ray: Dang, man! A Jehovah's Witness! Let me get the hose. / [[Ray continues to stare... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10112005 |
| Achewood - October 11, 2006 | Ray: So, like, what's it you do, here? / Lonis F. Edison: Damn it all! Is my sign out again? I paid dearly for it, but I can't watch it every moment of the day. My business would crumble! You don't know this from the way I seem to just go around answering doors, but I'm a very busy man. / Lonis F.... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10112006 |
| Achewood - October 11, 2006 | [[Ray and Lonis are walking down a corridor.]] / Lonis: Everyone in the Edison family was gifted with invention! Thomas had the most marketable sense of it, though. / Lonis: America was ready for him. America hated crapping in the dark. America hated waiting for a haircut just to hear the latest... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10112006 |
| Achewood - October 11, 2007 | [[Mr. Bear is Typing]] / Mr. Bear: 'Bill Gates stood at his enormous mahogany standing-desk, a gift from Japanese Prime Minister Fukuda.' < http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10112007 |
| Achewood - October 12, 2001 | [[Téodor and Lie Bot, alone]]
/ Téodor: Lie Bot, what is the best cheese for nachos? / Lie Bot: Hey man, that's easy. It's called Pochego, and it's from France. / Lie Bot: If you don't believe me, you can read the liner notes from Rubber Soul. http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10122001 |
| Achewood - October 12, 2001 | Téodor: Lie Bot, what is the best cheese for nachos? / Lie Bot: Hey man, that's easy. It's called Pochego, and it's from France. / Lie Bot: If you don't believe me, you can read the liner notes from Rubber Soul. http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10122001 |
| Achewood - October 12, 2004 | [[Roast Beef, Emeril and Spongebath at the bar]]
/ Emeril: If you would excuse us Roast Beef I believe the Tenmen are warming up and we do not miss a moment
/ Roast Beef: Oh dang are they playing tonight I didn't even know / [[The Tenmen guitar player]] / [[The Tenmen bass player]] / [[The Tenmen drummer]] / [[All... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10122004 |
| Achewood - October 12, 2004 | [[Roast Beef, Emeril and Spongebath at the bar, with half-full drinks]]
/ Emeril: If you would excuse us Roast Beef I believe the Tenmen are warming up and we do not miss a moment
/ Roast Beef: Oh dang are they playing tonight I didn't even know / [[The Tenmen guitar player]] / [[The Tenmen bass player]] / [[The... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10122004 |
| Achewood - October 12, 2005 | Ray: Watchu doin' lettin' this Jehovah's Witness bother you, Beef?! I thought you had any sense! / Roast Beef: Oh uh this is Milklin and he is havin' just terrible luck gettin' converts
/ Ray: Good, good... / Roast Beef: Maybe you could give him some of your business advice Ray / Ray: For FREE?! / Ray:... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10122005 |
| Achewood - October 12, 2005 | Ray: Watchu doin' lettin' this Jehovah's Witness bother you, Beef?! I thought you had any sense! / Roast Beef: Oh uh this is Milklin and he is havin' just terrible luck gettin' converts
/ Ray: Good, good... / Roast Beef: Maybe you could give him some of your business advice Ray / Ray: For FREE?! / Ray:... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10122005 |
| Achewood - October 12, 2006 | [[Bensington Butters, anxiously looking over his right shoulder, walks down a dimly lit hallway. There is an entrance to another room on Bensington's left. On the wall to the right of the entry is written "Prototyping 73." Through the entrance, we can see a darkened room with table, harshly lit by a... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10122006 |
| Achewood - October 12, 2006 | [[Bensington Butters, anxiously looking over his right shoulder, walks down a dimly lit hallway. There is an entrance to another room on Bensington's left. On the wall to the right of the entry is written "Prototyping 73." Through the entrance, we can see a darkened room with table, harshly lit by a... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10122006 |
| Friday Acts | [[Another edition of The Philippe Times. Titled It's Acting Mania Day! Vol 9 No. 17]]
/ Friday Facts!
/ by Philippe, editor-in-chief! [[Pictured is Philippe with a baseball cap and sunglasses captioned 'If I was a famous director']]
/ DID YOU KNOW...
/ The best actor of all time? Mickey Mouse. Eighty years... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10122007 |
| Achewood - October 13, 2003 | Ray: Yo check it out, Beef! Let's see who can jump over that log the best!
/ I'll go first! / Ray: YYYYEAH! / Ray: MUCH style! < http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10132003 |
| Achewood - October 13, 2003 | Ray: Yo check it out, Beef! Let's see who can jump over that log the best!
/ I'll go first! / Ray: YYYYEAH! / Ray: MUCH style! < http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10132003 |
| Achewood - October 13, 2004 | [[Teodor sitting a a table; Ray holding a police scanner]]
/ Teodor: What's that, a walkie-talkie?
/ Ray: It's a police scanner, dude! This crap is hilarious! / Teodor: We've got one of those-- what are you tuned in to?
/ Ray: The Taco Bell frequency! You know, the one they use for their drive-through... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10132004 |
| Achewood - October 13, 2004 | [[Teodor sitting a a table; Ray holding a police scanner]]
/ Teodor: What's that, a walkie-talkie?
/ Ray: It's a police scanner, dude! This crap is hilarious! / Teodor: We've got one of those-- what are you tuned in to?
/ Ray: The Taco Bell frequency! You know, the one they use for their drive-through... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10132004 |
| Milklin's ad in Reminisce Magazine | [[Caption: A MONTH LATER.
/ Ray is sitting on a couch. Roast Beef appears in the doorway with a magazine in his hand.]]
/ Roast Beef: Dang man check it Milklin took your advice
/ Ray: Who? What? / [[Ray is shown to be wearing a robe and reading a newspaper.]]
/ Roast Beef: Check his ad in this magazine
/ Ray:... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10132005 |
| Achewood - October 13, 2006 | [[ title panel: IT'S A... JUDAS PRIEST FRIDAY ...THE 13TH]] / [[Roast beef is looking down at his feet]]
/ Roast beef: Oh man oh hilarious all havin' on some KangaRoos after all this time all zip-up pocket on the sides for coins or notes from a chick / [[An image of Roast Beefs KangaRoo clad feet]]
/ Roast... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10132006 |
| Achewood - October 13, 2006 | [[ title panel: IT'S A... JUDAS PRIEST FRIDAY ...THE 13TH]] / [[Roast beef is looking down at his feet]]
/ Roast beef: Oh man oh hilarious all havin' on some KangaRoos after all this time all zip-up pocket on the sides for coins or notes from a chick / [[An image of Roast Beefs KangaRoo clad feet]]
/ Roast... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10132006 |
| Cost cutting | [[Ray is in his "manager" clothes, sitting at the table with a piece of paper. Téodor is sitting at the other side of the table]]
/ Ray: Well, Téodor, as I'm sure you remember the Todd account has fallen through.
/ Téodor: [annoyed]Oh, really, Ray. / Ray: As such, we are taking some cost-cutting measures.... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10142002 |
| Achewood - October 14, 2003 | RAY: Little Nephew! What in the HELL are you wearin'?! / LITTLE NEPHEW: Jeez! Shut UP Uncle Ray!
/ [[little nephew is wearing a backwards ball cap, a sports jersey sporting the letters LN tucked into Tommy Hilfiger-like underwear and, presumably, little pant legs attached to each leg via their own tiny... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10142003 |
| Little Nephew's Hip-Hop Pants | RAY: Little Nephew! What in the HELL are you wearin'?! / LITTLE NEPHEW: Jeez! Shut UP Uncle Ray!
/ [[little nephew is wearing a backwards ball cap, a sports jersey sporting the letters LN tucked into Tommy Hilfiger-like underwear and, presumably, little pant legs attached to each leg via their own tiny... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10142003 |
| Achewood - October 14, 2003: Little Nephew's Hip-Hop Pants | RAY: Little Nephew! What in the HELL are you wearin'?! / LITTLE NEPHEW: Jeez! Shut UP Uncle Ray!
/ [[little nephew is wearing a backwards ball cap, a sports jersey sporting the letters LN tucked into Tommy Hilfiger-like underwear and, presumably, little pant legs attached to each leg via their own tiny... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10142003 |
| Achewood - October 14, 2003 | RAY: Little Nephew! What in the HELL are you wearin'?! / LITTLE NEPHEW: Jeez! Shut UP Uncle Ray!
/ [[little nephew is wearing a backwards ball cap, a sports jersey sporting the letters LN tucked into Tommy Hilfiger-like underwear and, presumably, little pant legs attached to each leg via their own tiny... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10142003 |
| Achewood - October 14, 2003 | RAY: Little Nephew! What in the HELL are you wearin'?! / LITTLE NEPHEW: Jeez! Shut UP Uncle Ray!
/ [[little nephew is wearing a backwards ball cap, a sports jersey sporting the letters LN tucked into Tommy Hilfiger-like underwear and, presumably, little pant legs attached to each leg via their own tiny... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10142003 |
| Achewood - October 14, 2004 | [[Lyle on the couch]]
/ Teodor: What's on, Lyle? / Lyle: Oh, just doin' my homework on the gonzo biz. Got a couple UK titles to check out. / [[A man in a witch's hat on the television]]
/ MAGICAL SEX BLOKES Vol. 8
/ Man in Witch's Hat: Oi! / Teodor: What do you want to do for dinner?
/ TV: Mmm yeah luv / Lyle:... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10142004 |
| Achewood - October 14, 2004 | [[Lyle on the couch]]
/ Teodor: What's on, Lyle? / Lyle: Oh, just doin' my homework on the gonzo biz. Got a couple UK titles to check out. / [[A man with a porn mustache in a witch's hat on the television]]
/ MAGICAL SEX BLOKES Vol. 8
/ Man in Witch's Hat: Oi! / Teodor: What do you want to do for dinner?
/ TV:... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10142004 |
| Achewood - October 14, 2005 | [[Dr. Andretti is operating on Ray]]
/ Ray: Thanks for this, Doc. I just wasn't sure I'd ever have the chance, you know?
/ Dr. Andretti: Of course. And thank YOU for the considerable donation. We'll be able to help a lot of children at that new clinic, Ray.
/ Ray: Children are pretty good, you know.
/ Dr.... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10142005 |
| Achewood § October 14, 2009 | FIRST ROW, First Panel: [[Todd is standing over Téodor's shoulder. Téodor types at the computer.]]
/ Todd: S-S-So! How many chicks wrote back? I wanna frikkin' roll inna hay tonight, I'll tell you that much!
/ Second Panel: [[Téodor spins to face Todd.]]
/ Téodor: That's the fifth time you've asked... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10142009 |
| Achewood - Philippe's mouth - October 15, 2001 | [[Téodor and Mr. Bear at left of frame, Philippe at right]]
/ Téodor: Watch how Philippe opens his mouth. It's kind of gross.
/ Mr. Bear: Okey doke. / Téodor: Hey Philippe, open your mouth.
/ Philippe: Okay Téodor / [[Philippe opens his mouth, differently than he does in any other strip. It's kind of... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10152001 |
| Achewood - Philippe's mouth - October 15, 2001 | [[Téodor and Cornelius at left of frame, Philippe at right]]
/ Téodor: Watch how Philippe opens his mouth. It's kind of gross.
/ Cornelius: Okey doke. / Téodor: Hey Philippe, open your mouth.
/ Philippe: Okay Téodor / [[Philippe opens his mouth, differently than he does in any other strip. It's kind of... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10152001 |
| Achewood - October 15, 2001 | [[Téodor and Cornelius at left of frame, Philippe at right]]
/ Téodor: Watch how Philippe opens his mouth. It's kind of gross.
/ Cornelius: Okey doke. / Téodor: Hey Philippe, open your mouth.
/ Philippe: Okay Téodor / [[Philippe opens his mouth. Téodor and Cornelius recoil in horror]] http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10152001 |
| Achewood - October 15, 2002 | [[Philippe is wearing a groom's tuxedo and on his knees next to a flower.]]
/ Philippe: Th- This flower is going to die in the winter, Mr. Bear? / [[Mr. Bear is in a bathrobe, holding a watering can.]]
/ Mr. Bear: Yes, the first frost usually takes these, Philippe. We'll plant new ones in the Spring.
/ Philippe:... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10152002 |
| Achewood - October 15, 2002 | [[Philippe is wearing a groom's tuxedo and on his knees next to a petunia.]]
/ Philippe: Th- This flower is going to die in the winter, Mr. Bear? / [[Mr. Bear is in a bathrobe, holding a watering can.]]
/ Mr. Bear: Yes, the first frost usually takes these, Philippe. We'll plant new ones in the Spring.
/ Philippe:... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10152002 |
| Achewood - October 15, 2003 | {{OPEN MIC NIGHT / LASZLO'S CAFE / THE UNDERGROUND / 3 AM}} / [[Roast Beef holds a microphone and reads from a handful of small papers]]
/ Roast Beef: Loaded gun
/ Roast Beef: hidden in a corn cob
/ Roast Beef: baby carrot is the trigger / Roast Beef: The bone pulls out of the drumstick
/ Roast Beef: to... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10152003 |
| Achewood - October 15, 2004 | Teodor: What was with the Madame Tussaud's van out front?
/ Ray: They were droppin' off my new Damon and Affleck! / Teodor: You bought wax figures of Matt Damon and Ben Affleck?
/ Ray: Those guys are friends, man. Those guys are straight-up friends. / [[Ray and Teodor look at the wax figures]] / Teodor:... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10152004 |
| Achewood - October 15, 2007 | [[Téodor holds a video camera]]
/ Téodor: Alright, well, we're live in five minutes. You ready, Todd? / [[Todd is on the set]]
/ Todd: I g-g-got like any frikkin' guests or somethin'? M-M-Musical act an' shit? / Téodor: No, looks like you're ad-libbing the whole hour. Ray pretty much bailed on this... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10152007 |
| a class="searchlink" href="http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10152008">http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10152008 | [untranscribed - please consider transcribing this comic!] |
| Achewood - The backyard gig - October 16, 2001 | [[Téodor and Mr. Bear encounter Lyle]]
/ Lyle: You guys want to come see my band's first gig? / Téodor: What do you call yourselves?
/ Lyle: Mister Band.
/ [[Lyle hands them a flyer]] / [[They read the flyer]]
/ Téodor: "Sex Funeral"?
/ Mr. Bear: A dollar for a shot of Scope? http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10162001 |
| Achewood - The backyard gig - October 16, 2001 | [[Téodor and Mr. Bear encounter Lyle]]
/ Lyle: You guys want to come see my band's first gig? / Téodor: What do you call yourselves?
/ Lyle: Here, have a flyer.
/ [[Lyle hands them a flyer]] / [[They read the flyer]]
/ Téodor: "Sex Funeral"?
/ Mr. Bear: A dollar for a shot of Scope? http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10162001 |
| Achewood - The backyard gig - October 16, 2001 | [[Téodor and Mr. Bear encounter Lyle]]
/ Lyle: You guys want to come see my band's first gig? / Téodor: What do you call yourselves?
/ [[Lyle hands them a flyer]] / [[They read the flyer]]
/ Téodor: "Sex Funeral"?
/ Mr. Bear: A dollar for a shot of Scope? http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10162001 |
| Achewood - October 16, 2002 | [[The phone on Téodor's bedside table is ringing. Téodor lies in bed, asleep]]
/ < http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10162002 |
| Achewood - October 16, 2003 | [[Ray and Roast Beef sitting down and talking.]]
/ Ray: Dang, Beef! ComCast ain't fixed your cable internet yet?!
/ Roast Beef: I don't wanna talk about it / [[Close-up on Roast Beef.]]
/ Ray (from offscreen): How long's it been since you been on-line, anyway?
/ Roast Beef: Like a million days it seems
/ Gettin'... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10162003 |
| Achewood - October 16, 2006 | < http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10162006 |
| Achewood - October 16, 2006 | < http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10162006 |
| Achewood - October 16, 2007 | Todd: An-an-an if I do say so myself, smoke Tall Hot Brutes, the cig wit' data
/ certain...carcinogenerosity! / Roast Beef: [[watching tv]] Oh my god they doin' it up hell of SNL style from the DAY! / Todd: Now, T-bag do me an impersonation 'a ... 'a... Martha Stewart inna frikkin' shower! /
/ Teodor:... http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10162007 |
| Achewood - Téodor in the chat room - October 17, 2001 | [[Téodor sits at a computer, typing. A periscope looks over his shoulder]]
/ < http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10172001 |
| Achewood - October 17, 2001 | [[Téodor sits at a computer, typing. A periscope looks over his shoulder]]
/ < http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10172001 |
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