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| Saturday, November 08, 2003 | [[Dewey is walking Cathy out of the library, past the stacks]]
/ Cathy: Thanks for inviting me to your midnight library program.
/ Dewey: I didn't invite you. / Cathy: [[going out the door]] I had fun playing D&D. Is it normal to die seven times?
/ Dewey: Six. The last time you were buried alive. / Cathy:... http://www.unshelved.com/archive.aspx?strip=20031108 |
| Sunday, November 09, 2003 | "When will you shut down the library?" / Tamara: When people stop having children. / Dewey: After taxpayers completely take leave of their senses. / Colleen: When you pry the last book from my cold, dead hands. / Mel: Have you heard something I haven't? http://www.unshelved.com/archive.aspx?strip=20031109 |
| Monday, November 10, 2003 | [[For the first two panels, Dewey's inflating an inflatable chair. Children (or are they teens?) cluster about him. The dialog starts in the third panel.]]
/ Dewey: Be gentle with it! / [[Dewey walks away as Tamara glares at him.]]
/ Tamara: Why don't you just paint a target on . .
/ < http://www.unshelved.com/archive.aspx?strip=20031110 |
| Tuesday, November 11, 2003 | Mel: Dewey, we need numbers.
/ Dewey: Good news, Mel. There are infinitely many! / Mel: I mean higher numbers.
/ Dewey: My secret? Exponents, and lots of them! / Mel: I see you took your pedantic pill today.
/ Dewey: It comes in liquid form.
/ [[Dewey points to his coffee]] http://www.unshelved.com/archive.aspx?strip=20031111 |
| Wednesday, November 12, 2003 | [[A patron speaks to Dewey at the check-out desk]]
/ Patron: Honestly, I don't have a penny on me.
/ Dewey: Don't worry, I'll cancel some of your fines so you can check that out. / Patron: [[pointing his finger in anger]] Are you saying that I'm destitute?
/ Dewey: No, you were.
/ Patron: That I need your... http://www.unshelved.com/archive.aspx?strip=20031112 |
| Thursday, November 13, 2003 | [[A pregnant woman is talking to Tamara at the information desk]]
/ [[Shirt text: BABY *downward-pointing arrow*]]
/ Woman: Do you have any books to help my baby study for standardized tests? / [[Pregnant woman is angry]]
/ Tamara: Graduate school exams? Or just the S.A.T.?
/ Woman: Are you making fun... http://www.unshelved.com/archive.aspx?strip=20031113 |
| Friday, November 14, 2003 | [[Boy is speaking to Dewey at the desk]]
/ Boy: Borrow a pencil sharpener? / [[Boy begins to sharpen pencil]] / [[Boy continues to sharpen pencil]] / [[Boy sharpens pencil to a stub]] / [[Back at the desk]]
/ Boy: Borrow a pen? http://www.unshelved.com/archive.aspx?strip=20031114 |
| Saturday, November 15, 2003 | [[Dewey is holding up items as Tamara checks them off on a list.]]
/ Tamara: Coffee?
/ Dewey: Check. / Tamara: Comics section?
/ Dewey: Check. / Tamara: Painkillers?
/ Dewey: Check.
/ Mel[[walking in]]: Doesn't the preschool come in today? http://www.unshelved.com/archive.aspx?strip=20031115 |
| Sunday, November 16, 2003 | Library Tip #21: Don't worry about the source / Woman: I checked the Internet, books, databases, obscure newsletters. I looked everywhere you suggested. / Woman: Then I found the answer on this gum wrapper! / Woman: What do you have to say about that?
/ Dewey: If you're done with this I'll put... http://www.unshelved.com/archive.aspx?strip=20031116 |
| Monday, November 17, 2003 | Mel: You have $2.50 in fines.
/ Patron: Outrageous! Will you match a competitor's price? / Mel: Um, this is a library, we don't have competitors.
/ Patron [[walking away]]: I'm taking my business to the Outlet City Branch. They're offering 30% off! / Mel [[with hands on head]]: We're in a price war?... http://www.unshelved.com/archive.aspx?strip=20031117 |
| Tuesday, November 18, 2003 | [[Mel is standing behind Dewey who is seated working at his computer]]
/ Mel: Dewey, I have a mission for you.
/ Dewey: Triple pay and permission to order the latest Babylon 5 boxed set. / [[Mel and Dewey are facing each other in profile]]
/ Mel: You don't even know what it is yet. It might be nice.
/ Dewey:... http://www.unshelved.com/archive.aspx?strip=20031118 |
| Going out of business? Wednesday, November 19, 2003 | [[Dewey is on his motorcycle outside the Outlet City Library. It is covered with signs reading "Going out of business", "Everything must go", "Sale", "30% Off!" etc.]] / [[Inside.]]
/ Dewey: You're going out of business?
/ Outlet City Librarian: Of course not. But it gets them in the door. / Dewey: What... http://www.unshelved.com/archive.aspx?strip=20031119 |
| Thursday, November 20, 2003 | [[Dewey is in a run-down library with patched sofas and a sign saying TRY OUR NEW TRS-80 COMPUTER!]]
/ Dewey: This is definitely the worst library I've ever seen.
/ Librarian: I've heard it compared to the great Library of Alexandria. / Dewey: Before or after it burnt to the ground?
/ Librarian: Sure,... http://www.unshelved.com/archive.aspx?strip=20031120 |
| Friday, November 21, 2003 | [[Mel and Dewey are in the staff room. Dewey is taking off his helmet.]]
/ Mel: Did you check out the Outlet City Branch?
/ Dewey: Yeah. You get what you pay for. / Colleen: How's their reference desk?
/ Dewey: One guy with a 1989 World Almanac.
/ Tamara: Children's section?
/ Dewey: A Barney doll and... http://www.unshelved.com/archive.aspx?strip=20031121 |
| Saturday, November 22, 2003 | [[Colleen and Dewey are standing on either side of the phone, staring at each other.]] / [[Zoom in on their stare down.]] / [[The phone rings!]] / [[Colleen and Dewey are in the midst of wrestling over the phone as Tamara walks up.]]
/ Tamara: Slow day? http://www.unshelved.com/archive.aspx?strip=20031122 |
| Sunday, November 23, 2003 | Merv: You're Ms. Reed, right? Dewey's teacher friend?
/ Cathy: That's right. / [[Merv touches her arm with his finger]] / Merv [[to Dewey, who is offpanel]]: I thought you said she was "clingy."
/ [[Cathy glares]] http://www.unshelved.com/archive.aspx?strip=20031123 |
| Monday, November 24, 2003 | [[Dewey approaches the Mallville Library where Buddy the Book Beaver, wearing fatigues, is digging a trench around the building]]
/ Dewey: What's going on?
/ Buddy: Mel says we're under siege today. / Dewey: [[Walking away from the library]] Forget you saw me.
/ Buddy: [[Still digging]] This is just... http://www.unshelved.com/archive.aspx?strip=20031124 |
| Tuesday, November 25, 2003 | [[Dewey at Returns counter of store. He is trying to return a box that says"DVD Player and Toaster"]]
/ Dewey: It says "no hassle returns"
/ Sales clerk: That's right. It's no hassle for us because we won't take it back" / Dewey: But..
/ Returns clerk: Have a nice day
/ Dewey: I'm a Librarian
/ Man next... http://www.unshelved.com/archive.aspx?strip=20031125 |
| Wednesday, November 26, 2003 | [[Dewey and Mel at reference desk, elderly patron filling out form in foreground]] / Dewey: Haven't we been closed for ten minutes?
/ Mel: She's filling out her absentee ballot. / Dewey: I'll kick her out.
/ Mel: [[stopping him]] No! She's voting on the library levy! / Dewey: I'll go make more coffee.
/ Mel:... http://www.unshelved.com/archive.aspx?strip=20031126 |
| Thursday, November 27, 2003 | "What are you thankful for?" / Colleen: I think you mean, "For what are you thankful?"
/ Buddy: Beer!
/ Dewey: That's a little didactic.
/ Tamara: Tofurkey.
/ Mel: The correct word is "pedantic."
/ Merv: I'm glad none of you is my English teacher. http://www.unshelved.com/archive.aspx?strip=20031127 |
| Friday, November 28, 2003 | Dewey: I don't know why we're even open.
/ Mel: We're here to serve the public. And they need us today more than ever! / [[Pull out. Everyone in the library has bloated bellies. One of them has come to the desk]]
/ Patron: Books on...
/ Mel: Overeating?
/ Dewey: Sorry, the first glutton in took them al... http://www.unshelved.com/archive.aspx?strip=20031128 |
| Saturday, November 29, 2003 | [[Patrons are waiting in line at the reference desk. A sign overhead says: Next Answer in 5 Minutes. Dewey is sitting at the desk with his feet up, reading. Mel is standing with her hands on her hips facing Dewey.]]
/ Dewey: You told me to pace myself. http://www.unshelved.com/archive.aspx?strip=20031129 |
| Sunday, November 30, 2003 | Patron [[holds paper up]]: I need to enlarge this to full-page size.
/ Dewey: The picture? / Patron: No, this letter 'a' here. / Patron [[holding paper with large 'a']]: I was joking. I wanted the picture.
/ Dewey [[standing in front of printer covered with pages of 'a']]: Let me teach you about sarcasm...
/ Merv:... http://www.unshelved.com/archive.aspx?strip=20031130 |
| Monday, December 01, 2003 | Mel: Are you going to the game this weekend?
/ Dewey: Naw, Buddy cleaned me out last time. / Mel: I meant the football game. What game did you mean?
/ Dewey: The game...where we...clean my apartment? / Mel: Tamara, are you going to the game this weekend?
/ Buddy to Dewey: The pawn shop wouldn't take... http://www.unshelved.com/archive.aspx?strip=20031201 |
| Tuesday, December 02, 2003 | [[Tamara talks to Dewey.]]
/ Tamara: Mel gave me two tickets to the football game. Want to go?
/ Dewey: I was thinking of seeing a movie. / Cathy: [[entering]] Hey, Dewey, want to catch a matinée?
/ Dewey: Can't. I'm going to the football game with Tamara. / Tamara: You never move that fast when there's... http://www.unshelved.com/archive.aspx?strip=20031202 |
| Wednesday, December 03, 2003 | [[At the football game]]
/ Tamara: Cotton candy?
/ Cheerleaders: Hit 'em with the debit card/ Up your credit score/ They're cheaper by the dozen/ buy MORE MORE MORE! / [[Everyone cheers but Dewey, who is eating cotton candy]]
/ Dewey: We're definitely not here for the food.
/ Fans and Tamara: GO SHOPPE... http://www.unshelved.com/archive.aspx?strip=20031203 |
| Thursday, December 04, 2003 | [[At the football game, Dewey is reading]]
/ Tamara: You're not a sports person, are you?
/ Dewey: Boys who are into sports tend not to become librarians. / Tamara: You're missing out. There's lots of excitement!
/ Dewey: Hey! Someone took my wallet! / Tamara: That's a little too exciting. http://www.unshelved.com/archive.aspx?strip=20031204 |
| Friday, December 05, 2003 | [[Dewey is talking to two policemen]] / Cop 1: Don't worry, pal. We'll pick up the pesky perp who picked your pocket.
/ Dewey: That's a lot of alliteration. / Cop 1: That's a lot of attitude Mr. 911-Hangup-Guy-Whose-Wallet-Was-Stolen.
/ Dewey: Especially for a guy loitering at a high school without I.D. / [[Tamara... http://www.unshelved.com/archive.aspx?strip=20031205 |
| Saturday, December 06, 2003 | [[Tamara shelves a book as a patron looks on.]] / [[Tamara checks out a book to the same patron, who is looking at her chest.]] / [[Tamara, glaring, forcefully hands over the books to the patron who is still looking at her chest.]] / Tamara [[scowling]]: ... and he never once took his eyes off my... http://www.unshelved.com/archive.aspx?strip=20031206 |
| Sunday, December 07, 2003 | Woman: Does your machine do double-sided copies?
/ Dewey: Nope. Not last week and not this week either. / Dewey: But it does have a new origami attachment! For ten cents more it will fold your copy into a crane! / Mel: What did we learn today about sarcasm?
/ Dewey: It's wasted on the weak-minded.
/ [[Dewey... http://www.unshelved.com/archive.aspx?strip=20031207 |
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