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| My Name Is | Weedmaster P: Bacon Costner Federline Kline Nealon Pollack Shields Smith Sorbo Spacey
/ Tallahassee: Famous Kevins!
/ Jeffrey: Dang it I knew that!
/ Tallahassee: I win! / Jeffrey: Man, sometimes I wish I had a weird, interesting name and not a regular name that a billion other douchebags have... Like... Barack!
/ Weedmaster P: Your parents named you Jeff because they knew you would not be special / Jeffrey: That's not true! You're just jealous 'cause your name is Weedmaster P.
/ Weedmaster P: My parents totally knew what they were getting into http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070213.html |
| Giant-Footed Whorez | Giant-Footed Whorez / Jeff: Um excuse me...
/ Blonde: ...and then Brandon and Justin and Tyler and Zach and Josh and Jacob all slept over at my house...
/ Brunette: We're not skinny enough.
/ Blonde: Oh I know... / Jeff: Excuse me... / Jeff: What kind of birds are you guys? / Seriously they look like bird people / I'm like a bird / I'll only fly away / I don't know where my soul is / I don't know where my home is http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070215.html |
| OVERCOMPENSATING: The True Story of a Boy With Poor Impulse Control | Jeffrey: Hmm...
/ Jeffrey: No, it just doesn't work... / Jeffrey: I need to get a real stupid-lookin' dog. How do you do that? Is there like a "dog store" or do you just kinda drive around 'til you find one?
/ Tallahasee: Why, Jeffrey?
/ Jeffrey: N...no reason. / Tallahassee:You just want a dog so you can dress it up like a bee and put pictures of it on the internet!
/ Jeffrey: For your information, I was also gonna parade it all around the town square! http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070219.html |
| OVERCOMPENSATING: Catnip For Machine Elves | Weedmaster P: HEY DONG-GRABBER DO YOU GOT ANY L.S.D.?
/ Jeff: No, I... no. Why?
/ Weedmaster P: WAYNE IS LIKE SLIPPIN' OUT OF REALITY MAN / Jeff: You let your self-transforming Machine Elf eat L.S.D.? That's preposterous!
/ Weedmaster P: NO IT AIN'T IT'S LIKE CATNIP
/ IF ANYONE NEEDS ME I'LL BE AT THE DRUGS DISTRICT / Narration: BASEMENT LEVEL TWO
/ Machine Elf: SCREEEEE < http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070220.html |
| Jesus is Coming (To Town) | [[Jesus Christ is on the phone with Tallahassee Econolodge]] / J.C.: Tallahassee, it's J.C. Meet me at the place. / T.E.: Okay. ...what? / [[J.C. and T.E. are in a parking lot]] / J.C. Do you have the data you've been collecting re: Jeffrey Rowland's naughty behavior?
/ T.E. You... didn't tell me I was supposed to be doing that. / J.C. It is not company policy to supply "lucid instructions." Our directives are vague and intended for centuries of interpretation. / T.E. Wait, I thought you Guys could see everything in the hearts of men, like Santa Claus! / [[Jeffrey Rowland is sleeping on a mattress, holding Joanna, and wearing a tinfoil hat and tinfoil briefs; Weedmaster P. sleeps on a chair nearby]] J.C. {voice-over}: Jeffrey Rowland utilizes sophisticated counter-measures that block our telepathic rays. http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070221.html |
| The War Against Partying | Jeff: Man, New York Comic-Con is tomorrow and I just don't feel like partying...
/ < http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070222.html |
| Tallahassee's First Con | Tallahassee: Where are we going, Jeffrey?
/ Jeffrey: I'm takin' you to a Comics Convention... for Work!
/ Tallahassee: Turn around. NOW. / Jeffrey: Come on, Tallahassee! A Comics Convention can be fun and slightly profitable on paper!
/ Tallahassee: Why can't Baby or Weedmaster P go instead? / Jeffrey:Baby got hurt at the last one and Weedmaster P... he ain't allowed no more. Besides, somebody's gotta run the shop while we're gone. / [[Baby lies passed out and Weedmaster P is playing with a bug.]]
/ MEANWHILE... / Jeffrey: Bein' at a Comickin' Convention is like the whole interwub comes alive and is stayin' in the same hotel as you! / [[Tallahassee ponders Jeffrey's coment and dies a little inside.]] / Tallahassee: Jeffrey I don't want the internet to come to life...
/ Tallahassee: ever. / Jeffrey: Relax, Tallahassee. It ain't the bad parts...
/ Jeffrey: ... I mean not the real bad parts. http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070223.html |
| NYCC 2007 Part One | [[THE NEW YORK COMIC-CON]]
/ < http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070226.html |
| NYCC 2007: Critter Heroes Unite | [[ Doctor Vampire (dressed as a gopher), Jeffrey (dressed as a groundhog) and Jon Rosenberg (dressed as the Hebrew Weasel) are standing in front of the Dumbrella booth at the New York Comic Con ]]
/ Doctor Vampire: Jeffrey it hurts my feelings when you call me Dr. Vampire.
/ Jeffrey: Okay from now on I'll call you Kid Gopher.
/ Doctor Vampire: OK.
/ Jon Rosenberg: When do we get to fight evil? I'm ready to rid New York of evil. / [[ Phillip Karlsson (holding a beer) and Steven Cloud (with wings and a halo) ]]
/ Phillip Karlsson: H-h-hey wh-what are you guysh doin'? H-how come we ain't got fanshy coshtumes? / [[ Jeffrey and Talahassee Econolodge (dressed as a white bunny) ]]
/ Jeffrey: God dangit guys we ain't got no more money for critter outfits. Phillip, you're The Swede. Steven, you're Angelman.
/ Talahassee Econolodge: "Angelman's" is a neuro-genetic defect.
/ Jeffrey: Fine. / [[ Jeffrey, holding a chair ]]
/ Jeffrey: Let's get to business, Critter Heroes. New York Comic Con charged us $85 for this chair. Let's get buck wild. / Jon Rosenberg: But... what if they don't let us come back next year? / Jeffrey: The Critter Heroes are too cuddly and adorable to combat real crime. http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070227.html |
| NYCC 2007: The Fall of the Critter Heroes | [[ Jeffrey (dressed as a groundhog) and Jon Rosenberg (dressed as the Hebrew Weasel) in front of the Dumbrella booth at New York Comic Con ]]
/ Jeffrey: Groundhog Man is already tired of the ineffective and tedious habits of the Critter Heroes. Every day is the same when you are Groundhog Man.
/ Jon Rosenberg: The Hebrew Weasel is in agreement. / Jon Rosenberg: Perhaps New York City is an inappropriate venue for the debut of a new crime-fighting squad; here is a place where crime is already considered iillegal. / [[ Phillip Karlsson (as The Swede) has joined Jeffrey and Jon ]]
/ Jeffrey: Then the Critter Heroes will go to a place where crime goes on rampantly and unchecked!
/ Jon Rosenberg: Neither The Swede nor the Hebrew Weasel are allowed within 100 yards of the White House. http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070301.html |
| OVERCOMPENSATING: The True Story of a Boy With Poor Impulse Control | [[Tie Hunter flies in front of a setting sun]] / Jeffrey Rowland: How did you enjoy your first comics convention, Tallahassee?
/ Tallahassee: I'm gonna throw up... / Jeffrey Rowland: You know if you really think about it, throwin' up is like poopin' our of your head!
/ Tallahassee: Please pull over Jeffrey. / Jeffrey Rowland: Aw shit it's the pigs! / Narrator: THIRTY MINUTES LATER
/ Jeffrey Rowland: The nice thing about getting stopped comin' back from a comics-con is you can talk your way out of a ticket 'cause it isn't canon. http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070302.html |
| Genital's Discount Tittery | Weedmaster P: LET'S GO DOWN TO GENITAL'S DISCOUNT TITTERY AND LISTEN TO WILD PARTY SONGS
/ Jeff: Genital's Discount Tittery has the wildest party songs in town! / Weedmaster P: AND THE NAKEDEST LADIES GRINDING THEIR LIONS INTO YOUR BACK
/ Jeff: Surgical-grade nudity! / Weedmaster P: LAST WEEK A GUY DIED AT G.D.T. AND THEY DIDN'T CALL THE POLICE FOR THREE DAYS OUT OF RESPECT
/ Jeff: You get free buffalo wings if you wear a shirt! / {{Alt-text: I have never been to a naked place that used apostrophes correctly}} http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070303.html |
| http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070305.html | I love spending time at General's Discount Tittery but I'm gonna be late for Rad Practice if I don't leave in two hours...
/ Oh come on / Life is what happens between drinking contests / *One gallon of tequila later
/ Hey pruddy lady you wanna-oh wait you're a dude, my bad
/ Faggot http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070305.html |
| I'm a Slave 4 Ru(pert) | [[Jeffrey's sitting next to a computer at the TopatoCo HQ, while bald Baby stands behind him holding an umbrella]]
/ Jeffrey: I'm tired of indirectly bankrolling the right-wing agenda! I'm deleting my MySpace account!
/ Baby: Nooo Jeffrey don't do that! Everybody that's cool has got a MySpace! / Jeffrey: There's nothing "cool" about padding the fat pockets of stodgy old conservatives! Down with the establishment!
/ Baby: But MySpace has got some glitter themes and can play 20 songs at once! / [[Jeffrey and Baby are crawling on the floor. Jeffrey has a snake wrapped around his neck]]
/ Jeffrey: Deleting my MySpace account will send a clear message to the world that I do not have a MySpace account.
/ Baby: My top friends will die someday! / {{title text: Mary Poppins 2: I Am The Antichrist}}
/ {{tagline: Everytime you use a MySpace Rupert Murdoch kills a kangaroo}} http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070306.html |
| More Song Deconstructions | [[Jeffrey as Fergie]]
/ Jeffrey; My breasts and buttocks cause men to purchase a variety of brand-name products.
/ Narrator; BLACK-EYED PEAS
/ "MY HUMPS" / [[Jeffrey as Kurt Cobain]]
/ Jeffrey; Watermelon Pedophile Pickleslide Shotgun Starbucks Pimp Shame
/ Narrator; NIRVANA
/ "ENTIRE LIBRARY" / [[Jeffrey as Humpty Hump]]
/ Jeffrey; My uncontrollable promiscuity and enormous penis more than compensates for my freakish appearance and bizarre, hedonistic behavior.
/ Also, I have created a dance.
/ Narrator; DIGITAL UNDERGROUND
/ "THE HUMPTY DANCE"
/ {{title text: More Song Deconstructions}} http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070307.html |
| SQUOOSH | [[Jeffrey runs outside on the ice, carrying Joanna in a baby carrier]] / Jeffrey: You're lucky to be a cat, Joanna. Bein' a human bein' is so gross you wouldn't believe it. / Jeffrey: There's all the time something' seepin' or squirtin' out of you... bloody boogers, pee, diarrehea... it ain't like bein' a cat. / Jeffrey: Even the brain is just a wrinkly wad of squishy goop... / [[Jeffrey slips on the ice and goes sprawling face first, probably landing on Joanna.]] / < http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070308.html |
| Fix Her | Hey Tallahassee do you got any of them Joanna clones left over?
/ They're not clones, Jeffrey. They're dolls. And they're $65.
/ And no. / Man I ain't got that kinda money. Anyway I accidentally squooshed the real Joanna so you can fix her with your old sewin' tools can't ya? / I don't know how to fix an alive cat, much less a zombie cat you found in Hell. I'm not a vegetarian. / "We can never replace lives, and we can't heal hearts... except through prayer.
/ That gives me an idea! http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070309.html |
| The Devil and Ms. Joanna | Jeffrey: Jesus and Mohammed and Ganesh and Xenu, hear my prayer! / Jeffrey: I accidentally squished my zombie kitty! I command you to make her be okay again! / Jesus's phone: rrrring
/ Mohammed's phone: rrriing
/ Ganesh's phone: beep beep beep
/ Xenu's phone: rriing / Xenu: This looks like a job for Lord Xenu! / Xenu: This must be the place... / Xenu: God, it was so much easier just giving L. Ron Hubbard a hundred dollars... http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070312.html |
| Force Push | Jeffrey: Oh my god! Joanna, you're ok!!! / Jeffrey: Come here, let me give you a big ol' hug! / [[Joanna force pushes Jeffrey]] / Jeffrey: That's a bad kitty! Yes it is! http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070313.html |
| L Ron Harbl | Jeffrey: A bloo hoo bluh bloo
/ Weedmaster P: WHAT'S THE MATTER DICK ASS DID YOUR TINY PORCELAIN MICE COLLECTION GET DUSTY
/ Jeffrey: No... Well yes, but it's not that.
/ Jeffrey: I accidentally squashed Joanna but then I prayed for her to be fixed and now she's fixed but she's all mean...
/ Weedmaster P: YOU PRAYED WHO DID YOU PRAY TO
/ Jeffrey: Jesus, Mohammed, Ganesh, Xenu... all of 'em!
/ Weedmaster P: MAN YOU AIN'T SUPPOSED TO PRAY TO XENU HE'S THE DEVIL FROM SCIENTOLOGY
/ Jeffrey: That's why I prayed to him...
/ Jeffrey: So do you think Joanna is possessed by Xenu, the bad guy in Scientology?
/ Weedmaster P: PRETTY SURE MAN HURRY WE GOTTA GET TO THE ARMORY
/ {{SEVERAL HOURS PASS}}
/ [[THE ARMORY]]
/ Jeffrey: Where's the hydrogen bomb? The hydrogen bomb is missing!
/ Weedmaster P: I KNEW IT SHE'S GONNA THROW IT IN A VOLCANO AND LET ALL THOSE BODY THETANS LOOSE
/ Jeffrey: How do you know so much about Scientology, Weedmaster P?
/ Weedmaster P: I ONLY GOT WIKIPEDIA KNOWLEDGE WE NEED AN EXPERT
/ Jeffrey: Aw man! Where are we gonna find a Scientologist that isn't completely annoying?
/ Weedmaster P: THERE IS ONE
/ {{SOON}}
/ [[Beck's mailbox]]
/ Beck: I'm on it.
/ {{bottom text: BECAUSE WEEDMASTER P LOST JASON LEE'S PHONE NUMBER}}
/ {{title text: Beck's address is just 'Beck'}} http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070314.html |
| Beck Versus The Volcano | Narrator: VOLCANO MOUNTAIN
/ [[Joanna is pulling an H-Bomb towards the volcano]] / [[Joanna continues to pull the H-Bomb towards the volcano]] / Jeffrey Rowland: Oh noes we're too late! Joanna's gonna throw the H-Bomb in the volcano and let out a bunch of body thetans!
/ Weedmaster P: DO SOMETHING BECK / Beck: I'm a scientologist, Weedmaster P, not a time traveler. / [[Joanna is pushing the H-Bomb into the volcano]] / Weedmaster P: QUICK EVERYBODY GET UNDER A DESK / [[The H-Bomb detonates into a large mushroom cloud]] / [[Joanna is throw through the air by the sheer force of the explosion]] / Narrator: ONE HOUR LATER
/ Jeffrey Rowland: Ugh... / Beck: Woah! We're okay and my Thetan count is exactly the same...
/ Weedmaster P: IN YOUR FACE BECK THIS PROVES THAT SCIENTOLOGY IS TOTAL DOG THROW-UP / Beck: No it isn't. Scientology's about having a clean body and mind.
/ Jeffrey Rowland: And if Scientology is fake, who brought Joanna back to life? Huh? Santa Claus?
/ Weedmaster P: YOU TURD GOBBLERS ARE BRAIN WARSHED / [[Beck is standing smiling at Jeffrey Rowland who is doing the same at Beck. Jeffrey Rowland is carrying an unconscious Joanna]] / Jeffrey Rowland: Beck, I'm... I'm a poor person.
/ Beck: Thanks for your time. http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070315.html |
| OVERCOMPENSATING: The True Story of a Boy With Poor Impulse Control | neck tattoo friday!!! / My neck ehn't big enough for a dang tattoo!
/ Hypothetical neck tattoo Friday. / {{cut here}}
/ {{place on pike}} / {{if found, recoil in horror}} / {{my child coulda been a honor student if we had brung her up better}} http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070316.html |
| OVERCOMPENSATING: The True Story of a Boy With Poor Impulse Control | Jeffrey: God dangit I'm sick of bein' poor. I wanna be a rich dude so I can adopt Mexican babies and not pay taxes! / Tallahassee: Don't worry Jeffrey, Baby and I are opening TIARA HUT this week!
/ Baby: Yeh we'll be rollin' in Benjamins pretty soon! If ye ask real nice we might give ye a loan!
/ Jeffrey (thinking): They're gonna make a fool out of me!
/ Jeffrey: What the heck is Tiara Hut? / [[ELEVEN MINUTES LATER]]
/ Jeffrey: Poopmonster, do you think it's possible to get rich off selling jewel-encrusted pet accessories to rich idiots?
/ Poopmonster: Last time I checked this was America and I came up with that idea five years ago. If the idea succeeds you'll be hearing from my lawyer. / {{Come on down to Tiara Hut for the competitive prices}} http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070319.html |
| Snacks, Limes, and Videotape With Poor Impulse Control | [[Jeff is at a drafting board or a computer; Vermont Pete is entering the room with a VHS tape.]]
/ Jeff Rowland: You may enter, Vermont Pete.
/ Vermont Pete: Dude. Brah. You gotta check this out yeah. / [[Jeff holds the VHS tape at arm's length, scared.]]
/ Jeff: What is this?! Is this a _bomb_?
/ Vermont Pete: It's a VHS tape. Watch it.
/ Jeff: Watch it do what? /Explode?!/ / [[Vermont Pete is upset; Jeff has calmed down.]]
/ Vermont Pete: It's a /videotape/. It's what we used to watch movies on before Apple invented the iMplant.
/ Jeff: How do they fit all the little men in here? / {{title text: Before VHS there were very large DVDs.}} http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070320.html |
| Only One Vermont Pete | Vermont Pete: Thanks for lettin' me fuckin' hang while the Outrider is in fuckin' Maine or somethin
/ Weedmaster P: FUCKING
/ Jeffrey Rowland: It's fun to have dudes time some-times Vermont fuckin' Pete. / Jeffrey Rowland: Girls are always tellin' us to stop sayin' fuck and shit. Fuck that, man. / Vermont Pete: Oh yeah did I ever tell you fuckers I'm a fuckin' Highlander? / Jeffrey Rowland: No fucking way. That's fucking nuts. http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070321.html |
| Overactive Bladder Syndrome | Jeffrey: Weedmaster P what are you doing in there? You've been in there for several hours!
/ Weedmaster P: DROPPIN' MAD BEE-EM'S KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN' / Jeffrey: Please let me in! I have to pee so bad!
/ Weedmaster P: WHAT PART OF DROPPIN' MAD BEE-EM'S DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND / Jeffrey: C'mon let me in, I can pee in the space between your legs and be real careful.
/ Weedmaster P: OH ALL RIGHT COME ON IN. http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070322.html |
| The Battle of Long Island | < http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070323.html |
| The Battle of Long Island Part Two | Jeffrey: Don't worry about the car, Tallahassee! We have to save Long Island! / Jon: Jeffery, you made it! Welcome to I-con, Long Island's most amazing science fiction and fantasy occasion!
/ Jeffrey: This is a Code Azure, Mr. Rosenberg, there's no time for chit-chat. Where's the action at. We gotta save the day! / Jon: There is no Code Azure! I just made that up because I knew you wouldn't go to I-con otherwise! / Jeffrey: You set me up you son of a bitch!
/ < http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070326.html |
| You Down Wit OCD | Jeffrey: I got ADHD, Tallahassee.
/ Tallahassee: No way.
/ Jeffrey: Yup. And I'm gonna give myself OCD to help balance it out. / Tallahassee: Isn't that like eating a handful of No-Doz so you don't pass out from being too drunk? / Jeffrey: Yup. http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070328.html |
| OVERCOMPENSATING: The Journal Comic With a Seething Disdain for Reality. | I got ADHD, Tallahassee.
/ No way!
/ Yup. And I'm gonna give myself OCD to help balance it out. / Isn't that like eating a handful of No-Doz so you don't pass out from being too drunk? / Yup. http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070328.html# |
| Freedom Bird | Baby: C'mon, guys. Jeffrey's on his death-bed again and wants us to gather round him dressed as angels. / Jeffrey: Hello, everyone. Thank you for coming.
/ Weedmaster P: WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH YOU BIRD COCK
/ Jeffrey: Well, the last thing I remember... / Jeffrey: ...I was celebrating our freedom with a giant eagle. Suddenly and utterly unprovoked he bit me! / Weedmaster P: DAMN DUDE YOU GOT THE BIRD FLU http://overcompensating.com/posts/20070329.html |
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