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| SORE THUMBS * Mon-Wed-Fri * Insane Political Gaming Manga-Type Comics by Owen Gieni and Chris Crosby | Fairbanks: I am so happy to see that the government is finally doing something about the internet. That useless series of tubes has been tangled long enough! / Cecania: Yeah, right, you moron! Network neutrality is horribly unfair! / Fairbanks: WRONG! What's unfair is that these sad, misunderestimated... http://sorethumbsonline.com/d/20060802.html?newsbox20060815 |
| SORE THUMBS * Mon-Wed-Fri * Insane Political Gaming Manga-Type Comics by Owen Gieni and Chris Crosby | Cecania: Hello, Mother. I've graduated college. / Mother: Cecania! First you're arrested on television protesting the humane actions of our beloved president...
/ ...and now you're walking into our home looking like a porn star?! / Cecania: I hate you. I hate you so very much. / Mother: Why can't you... http://sorethumbsonline.com/d/20040308.html |
| SORE THUMBS * Mon-Wed-Fri * Insane Political Gaming Manga-Type Comics by Owen Gieni and Chris Crosby | Mother: Cecania, if you're going to live under my oxygen-pumped roof and eat my ultra-delicious food, you're obligated to work at your brother's video game shoppe. / Cecania: That's not fair! You gave him $80,000 to start that stupid place! Why can't you give me $80,000 to do whatever I want with? / Mother:... http://sorethumbsonline.com/d/20040310.html |
| SORE THUMBS * Mon-Wed-Fri * Insane Political Gaming Manga-Type Comics by Owen Gieni and Chris Crosby | Cecania: This is the moment where I begin to deeply regret my decision to merit in "TV Horror Show Hosting." A lot. / Cecania: Curse you, Cassandra "Elvira" Peterson! Curse you for being such an abnormally large influence over my entire life. / Fairbanks: Hmmm... Maybe Christian rock is too rowdy... / Fairbanks:... http://sorethumbsonline.com/d/20040312.html |
| SORE THUMBS * Mon-Wed-Fri * Insane Political Gaming Manga-Type Comics by Owen Gieni and Chris Crosby | Fairbanks: Why're you here? You hate me! You tried to send me up the river!
/ Cecania: My passion in life is nigh-impossible to do for a living... / Cecania: ...so Mother is making me work here for my room and board. / Fairbanks: HA HA! This is beautiful! I have my very own slave labor! I feel like... http://sorethumbsonline.com/d/20040315.html |
| SORE THUMBS * Mon-Wed-Fri * Insane Political Gaming Manga-Type Comics by Owen Gieni and Chris Crosby | Cecania: First of all, "buy one, get one free" is not a bold new idea-- / Fairbanks: I smell someone who is jealous of my outside the box genius! Jealous with envy! / Cecania: Second of all, even that age-old business chestnut could never ever ever work here. No one in their sane mind would possibly... http://sorethumbsonline.com/d/20040317.html |
| SORE THUMBS * Mon-Wed-Fri * Insane Political Gaming Manga-Type Comics by Owen Gieni and Chris Crosby | Cecania: Hmm. I can vaguely understand why an up-right conservative guy like yourself wouldn't carry games like "Grand Theft Auto: Hooker Hunt" in Sore Thumbs... / Cecania: ...but why not the "Mario" games? They're classic, and A-OK for all ages and sexes! / Fairbanks: GASP! C'mon, Cecania! Everybody... http://sorethumbsonline.com/d/20040319.html |
| SORE THUMBS * Mon-Wed-Fri * Insane Political Gaming Manga-Type Comics by Owen Gieni and Chris Crosby | Harmony: Cecania! / Fairbanks: Another customer, hooray! I feel like I've taken an illegal drug that supports terrorism!
/ Cecania: That's not a customer, that's my best friend! Harmony, what are you doing here? / Harmony: Your mother said you'd be here! I'm here 'cause you're here and I missed you... http://sorethumbsonline.com/d/20040322.html |
| SORE THUMBS * Mon-Wed-Fri * Insane Political Gaming Manga-Type Comics by Owen Gieni and Chris Crosby | Harmony: So what's the deal with this place, anyway?
/ Cecania: My brother Fairbanks owns it. Nobody ever shops here because he only stocks pure crap. / Harmony: That guy is Fairbanks? I always guessed he'd look more like Slimer from The Real Ghostbusters... only evil! / Cecania: I'm glad to hear you... http://sorethumbsonline.com/d/20040324.html |
| SORE THUMBS * Mon-Wed-Fri * Insane Political Gaming Manga-Type Comics by Owen Gieni and Chris Crosby | Panel 1. Harmony and Cecania
/ Harmony: So how do I get Fairbanks to marry me?
/ Harmony: Have sexual relations with him and then bring a fake baby into the picture?
/ Cecania: No, that's way too obvious, and it won't work on him... / Panel 2. Closeup on Cecania
/ He's vowed... http://sorethumbsonline.com/d/20040326.html |
| SORE THUMBS * Mon-Wed-Fri * Insane Political Gaming Manga-Type Comics by Owen Gieni and Chris Crosby | Panel 1. Harmony approaches Fairbanks, smiling and waving. Fairbanks is depressingly working calculator.
/ Harmony: Hi Fairbanks!
/ Harmony: I'm your sister Cecania's best friend Harmony!
/ Fairbanks: You have uncommonly dreadfultaste in best friends.
/ Fairbanks: Cecania once tossed... http://sorethumbsonline.com/d/20040329.html |
| SORE THUMBS * Mon-Wed-Fri * Insane Political Gaming Manga-Type Comics by Owen Gieni and Chris Crosby | Cecania: How'd it go? Details!
/ Harmony: I only had to say 53.75 words before he professed his love for me! That's almost a new record! / Cecania: Brilliant! You'll be gettin' hitched in no time! / Harmony: Yeah, I guess. / Cecania: What's wrong? / Harmoney: Well, I normally love marrying stupid... http://sorethumbsonline.com/d/20040331.html |
| SORE THUMBS * Mon-Wed-Fri * Insane Political Gaming Manga-Type Comics by Owen Gieni and Chris Crosby | Panel 1. Harmony and Cecania
/ Harmony: Marrying a man that I just met and dislike immeasurably sounds good, in theory...
/ Harmony: ...but I'm not 100% certain that the end result will be a glorious life adventure! / Panel 2. Closeup Harmony and Cecania
/ Harmony (suspicious): Like,... http://sorethumbsonline.com/d/20040402.html |
| SORE THUMBS * Mon-Wed-Fri * Insane Political Gaming Manga-Type Comics by Owen Gieni and Chris Crosby | Panel 1. Cecania leaving Harmony
/ Cecania: Take an hour or two of "alone time" with loverboy... I'm off to find a cheap distributor of blood-soaked electronic entertainment we can fill the store with once it has been liberated.
/ Harmony (calling after Cecania and waving): Okay, I'll try to be engaged... http://sorethumbsonline.com/d/20040405.html |
| SORE THUMBS * Mon-Wed-Fri * Insane Political Gaming Manga-Type Comics by Owen Gieni and Chris Crosby | Cecania: So, your wang got blown off in Iraq, huh? How'd that happen?
/ Sawyer: Not blown off, ma'am. It was cut off. / Sawyer: Sigh... My fellow soldiers had just played a prank on me... One that stranded me in the middle of the Iraqi desert... Without a shred of clothing. / Sawyer: Just as I reckoned... http://sorethumbsonline.com/d/20040407.html |
| SORE THUMBS * Mon-Wed-Fri * Insane Political Gaming Manga-Type Comics by Owen Gieni and Chris Crosby | Cecania: So that's it? Didn't you get the Medal of Honor or some big military award like that? / Sawyer: Naw, I was alone... nobody would believe I didn't do it myself, for some nutty reason.
/ Cecania: Ah. / Sawyer: My commandin' officer felt a bit sorry for me, though. He gave me that bear as a gift.... http://sorethumbsonline.com/d/20040409.html |
| SORE THUMBS * Mon-Wed-Fri * Insane Political Gaming Manga-Type Comics by Owen Gieni and Chris Crosby | Panel 1. Sawyer sitting on couch. Cecania sitting on other end of couch giving Coleman a tummy rub.
/ Sawyer: Commandin' officer said if they ever capter the evil Iraqi fella what done this to me, he'd try to swing it so I could do the same to him.
/ Cecania (eyes on Coleman): Wow.
/ Cecania:... http://sorethumbsonline.com/d/20040412.html |
| SORE THUMBS * Mon-Wed-Fri * Insane Political Gaming Manga-Type Comics by Owen Gieni and Chris Crosby | Panel 1. Looking down on Harmony and Fairbanks sitting one foot apart on a couch in the back room.
/ Harmony (hands on couch, looking away from Fairbanks): So... this back room is nice.
/ Fairbanks (arms akimbo, looking at or past Harmony): Yes. It allows me moments of quiet relief from the... http://sorethumbsonline.com/d/20040414.html |
| SORE THUMBS * Mon-Wed-Fri * Insane Political Gaming Manga-Type Comics by Owen Gieni and Chris Crosby | Panel 1. Cecania scritching Coleman, Sawyer in edge of frame.
/ Cecania: Coleman is soooooo cute!
/ Cecania: He should be starring in a 3-year series of hilarious beer commercials!
/ Coleman: CROLWLMWN! / Panel 2. Closeup on Sawyer, looking doubtful.
/ Sawyer: That'd be an ever-lovin', blue-eyed... http://sorethumbsonline.com/d/20040416.html |
| SORE THUMBS * Mon-Wed-Fri * Insane Political Gaming Manga-Type Comics by Owen Gieni and Chris Crosby | Panel 1. Harmony and Fairbanks on couch
/ Fairbanks: So... you say your favorite thing is protecting the sanctity of marriage. Correct?
/ Harmony: I did say that, yep.
/ Fairbanks: But answer me this... / Panel 2. Closeup on Fairbanks looking lawyerly, with index fingers together... http://sorethumbsonline.com/d/20040419.html |
| SORE THUMBS * Mon-Wed-Fri * Insane Political Gaming Manga-Type Comics by Owen Gieni and Chris Crosby | Harmony: Oh, right! Marriage is defined as "the legal union of a man and a woman as husband and wife"! That's sanctity! / Harmony: Gays can get married, of course, but it can't be called "marriage" legally. That would defy the sanctity of The Dictionary.
/ Fairbanks: Huh? No, gays can't get married at... http://sorethumbsonline.com/d/20040421.html |
| SORE THUMBS * Mon-Wed-Fri * Insane Political Gaming Manga-Type Comics by Owen Gieni and Chris Crosby | Well... it's been real interesting, but...
/ I guess I'd better be going...
/ Wait! Maybe I can help you, ma'am.
/ How? / Well, you say yer store needs games to sell, but ya'll don't have money to buy 'em.
/ Uh huh. / An' I've got gallons and gallons o' games, but no retail store-front to sell 'em in.
/ I... http://sorethumbsonline.com/d/20040423.html |
| SORE THUMBS * Mon-Wed-Fri * Insane Political Gaming Manga-Type Comics by Owen Gieni and Chris Crosby | This is excitin'!
/ Indeed! This cooperative business venture could change both of our lives for the better! / No, I meant goin' and ridin' in a car. But that thing, too! / It's exciting to ride in a car? / Fer me it is! I ain't been in a car since they shipped me back from Iraq last year.
/ Why? / Momma... http://sorethumbsonline.com/d/20040426.html |
| SORE THUMBS * Mon-Wed-Fri * Insane Political Gaming Manga-Type Comics by Owen Gieni and Chris Crosby | So... Cecania mentioned that you killed some terrorists! That's pretty damn sweet.
/ I'm no hero. The brave troops fighting terrorists in Iraq... they're the real heroes. I'm just a very special man. A Super-Patriot, if you will. The real tragedy is that my story was so ignored by the liberal media.... http://sorethumbsonline.com/d/20040428.html |
| SORE THUMBS * Mon-Wed-Fri * Insane Political Gaming Manga-Type Comics by Owen Gieni and Chris Crosby | Cecania: I'm just gonna stop off at home for a second to change...
/ Sawyer: All righty. / Cecania: I'll be just a second! / Sawyer: So...that girl is somethin', huh? What do ya think about her, pally? You gotta know I value yer opinion more'n anybody. / Coleman: HHROT! / Sawyer: A truer word was... http://sorethumbsonline.com/d/20040430.html |
| SORE THUMBS * Mon-Wed-Fri * Insane Political Gaming Manga-Type Comics by Owen Gieni and Chris Crosby | Sawyer: Golly, this Sore Thumbs place is slick. You got the name spelt out in big block letters an' everythin'.
/ Cecania: Yes. That's why we have no money to stock the store with games. / Fairbanks: Harmony...I've never met anyone like you before.
/ Harmony: Ditto...your head is shockingly round. ... http://sorethumbsonline.com/d/20040503.html |
| SORE THUMBS * Mon-Wed-Fri * Insane Political Gaming Manga-Type Comics by Owen Gieni and Chris Crosby | Sawyer: Mister Fairbanks, I...I'm real sorry what my bear done to you. Cecania made you out to be such a swell feller. I didn't see need for a leash or nuthin'. / Fairbanks: I am a swell feller! Your so-called "bear" must be mentally-imbalanced! / Sawyer: Oh, I see the problem. Coleman musta smelled... http://sorethumbsonline.com/d/20040505.html |
| SORE THUMBS * Mon-Wed-Fri * Insane Political Gaming Manga-Type Comics by Owen Gieni and Chris Crosby | Cecania: In all the confusion of miniature bears and bandages, I didn't get a chance to introduce you two to Sawyer Kaden!
/ Sawyer: Howdy! / Fairbanks: Sawyer Kaden, you and your bear are a menace to society! / Cecania: Uh, Sawyer owns a small video game distribution company here in town. / Fairbanks:... http://sorethumbsonline.com/d/20040507.html |
| SORE THUMBS * Mon-Wed-Fri * Insane Political Gaming Manga-Type Comics by Owen Gieni and Chris Crosby | Sawyer: I'm real sorry yer brother threatened to take his own life. Maybe I should go.
/ Cecania: No! This wasn't the first time Fairbanks threatened to shoot the devil out of his head. / Cecania: You should be honored, really...The last time was after I tricked him into criticizing Nancy Reagan. Of... http://sorethumbsonline.com/d/20040510.html |
| SORE THUMBS * Mon-Wed-Fri * Insane Political Gaming Manga-Type Comics by Owen Gieni and Chris Crosby | General Kaden, I can never apologize profusely enough for my behavior. You must know that I love and support America's brave fighting men and their brave tiny fighting bears more than anyone ever in history.
/ Though when I say love, I don't mean the kind that could make me a future super-gay.
/ And when... http://sorethumbsonline.com/d/20040512.html |
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