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| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Boris Karloff as The Mummy, wearing a backwards baseball cap and rhinestone studded sunglasses]] / Mummies. / The original gangsta wrappers. / {{That's MC Karloff, kicking it old school with his ascot and his scarab-ring bling... Actually, it kinda looks like he's flipping us the ibis.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2009-10-16 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Bald man in a white lab coat.]] / IAMS Recruiter: Have you ever built a death ray? Or reanimated the dead on a whim? / IAMS Recruiter: Do you think that YOU should rule the world? / IAMS Recruiter: Have you ever said the phrase: "I'll show those FOOLS at the Academy!"? / IAMS Recruiter: If you've done any of these things, you may want to consider a career in Mad Science... / {{The Institute for Advanced Mad Science offers career track, market driven courses both for crazed neophytes and for established scientists who are just beginning their descent into insanity.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2009-10-23 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Tiny plastic zombies with a measuring cup, dozens of bottles, and a cocktail shaker.]] / Pink: What's going on? / Blue: I think the zombies are trying to mix up a batch of zombies. / Pink: That's bad, right? Shouldn't we stop them? / Blue: Let's not rush to judgement. I won't know if it's bad or not until I've tasted it. / {{After exhaustive testing, I'm happy to report that the zombie's zombies aren't bad at all, although they do tend to use a bit too much grenadine.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2009-10-30 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Chocolate-brown disc in cellophane wrapper. Wrapper has the words "Tarte de la Lune" on it.]] / Sale graham, guimave and the finest chocolate, individually packaged. / Premise: / No matter what the humble origin of a product is / giving it a fancy french name makes it instantly classy. / {{From what I've heard, these go best with "Kola de Couronne Royal"}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2009-11-06 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[1950's scientist explaining readouts to a group of men with glasses and pocket protectors. The first three dials are pegged over to the right.]] / Scientist: This device predicts how people will use our new "Inter Nets." / Scientist: These first two gauges are labeled "Pornography" and "Illegal Music." / Scientist: The third one is for pictures of cats with funny captions. / {{I love old computers. It amazes me to think that the computational power of a roomful of tubes and wires can now be replicated in something smaller than a postage stamp.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2009-11-13 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Dymaxion projection map of the world with stars and numbers on various cities and the Axiom Destruction Laboratories logo.]] / Mogadishu - 8.6
/ Abu Dhabi - 8.3
/ Okinawa - 8.8
/ Vladivostok - 8.5
/ Manitoba - 9.1
/ Oklahoma - 9.3
/ Venezuela - 8.2
/ Argentina - 9.2 / To: Oscar Hammerstein & Richard Rodgers
/ Re: The Wind / Our technicians have completed the requested domestic and international location analysis. / This is not our usual area of scientific expertise. However, according to our readings, the average "Whistling" quotient of the wind was highest in Oklahoma. / Best of luck with your musical. / {{Axiom Destruction Labs uses Buckminster Fuller's Dymaxion projected map because the word "Dymaxion" sounds cool. The lack of North/South bias and the low distortion of areas and shapes are secondary considerations.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2009-11-20 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Darkened concert stage with instruments, but no performers]] / Booking Agent: Ok, so there were a prime number of jellybeans in the Green Room. / Manager: Yes... / Booking Agent: There are hand sanitizing stations every twenty feet. / Manager: That's right. / Booking Agent: So why is the band not on stage?! / Manager: It's the number of tickets sold. It's not divisible by seven or by five. / Booking Agent: I swear to God, this is the last time I book a concert for "OCDC" / {{On the positive side, when they're on tour they'd never trash their hotel suite. They often leave rooms cleaner than they were when the band arrived.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2009-11-27 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Large trash bag on the sidewalk by the curb.]] / Pink: Wow! What's in the trash that weighs so much? / Blue: My back. / Pink: What?!? You threw that out? / Blue: Yeah. That's why the comic isn't very funny this week. / {{Looks like my weekend is going to have some Ibuprofin, occasional application of a heating pad, and lying very flat.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2009-12-04 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Strangely fragmented old pocketwatch]] / A clock
/ is a speedometer
/ for a time machine / {{And a calendar is a roadmap.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2009-12-11 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Two ancient Egyptian figures talking]] / Pharaoh: So nobody actually gets buried. / Architect: No, Pharaoh. / Pharaoh: We just get a lot of money. / Architect: Yes, Pharaoh. / Pharaoh: Interesting. Tell me more about this "scheme." / {{The ancient Egyptian architectural firm of Ponzi and Sons would never be the same.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2009-12-18 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Tiny plastic zombies]] / Twelve Zombies Shambling / [[Band with drum reading "Midnight Sun Pipe Band - Yukon"]] / Eleven Pipers Piping / [[Squirrel jumping down front of building]] / Ten Squirrels Leaping / [[Armored woman on horseback with a lance]] / Nine Ladies Lancing / [[Group photo of the first eight Doctors Who]] / Eight Doctors Whoing / [[An upside-down 'e' in water]] / Seven Schwas Swimming / [[The great and small Pyramids of Giza]] / Six Giza Laying / [[Grey cat with Japanese book]] / Book of Five Rings / [[Switchboard operators]] / Four Calling Nerds / [[Fountain pen nib shaped like the Eifel Tower]] / Three French Pens / [[Two Harry Turtledove novels]] / Two Turtledoves / [[Siamese cat with glowing eyes]] / And a Cat God in a warm bed / {{With the hustle and bustle of modern life, it's good to remember the ingredients for a simple, tradiitonal Christmas.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2009-12-25 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Cowboy with semaphore flags]] / Tex Messaging / {{I think every cell phone company should include a pair of semaphore flags as a backup in case of a dropped signal.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-01-01 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Multiple copies of the same white bear outline with the word "IT" on them.]] / IT bears repeating. / {{This sets the stage for a potential future comic: IT Bears further examination.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-01-08 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Split-screen image of Gozer the Gozerian and the T-1000 Terminator.]] / Important cinematic lessons from 1984:
/ If an ancient Sumerian deity asks if you are a god
/ Say, "Yes!" / If a killer robot from the future asks if you are Sarah Connor
/ Say, "No!" / {{1984 was an awesome year for geeky movies. We had Ghostbusters, Terminator, Dune, Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom, Dune, A Nightmare on Elm Street, Sixteen Candles, and 2010.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-01-15 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Old photo of a man staring intently at a half-shaded lamp over a desk.]] / Frank practiced his psychic powers until he could cut a lamp in half with sheer willpower alone. / In some small way, this made up for only taking third place in the Garrison Keillor Look-A-Like Contest. / {{That's all the news from Lake Woebegone, Minnesota. Where all the women are strong, all the men are good looking, and all the children have an above average Psi rating.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-01-22 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Old western poster with a flower-headed man on a horse.]] / Peony Express
/ St. Joseph, Missouri to California
/ in 10 days or less. / WANTED
/ Young, Skinny, Wiry Flowers
/ not over eighteen. Must be expert
/ riders, willing to risk death daily. / Orphans preferred.
/ Wages $25 per week. / Apply, Peony Express Stables
/ St. Joseph, Missouri / {{Sending someone a bouquet of flowers was a difficult proposition in the Old West.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-01-29 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Post-it notes]] / Things this is not:
/ Party
/ Disco
/ Fooling Around
/ Mudd Club
/ C. B. G. B. / Things Heard Of:
/ Van
/ Gravesites
/ Gunfire (distant)
/ Houston
/ Detroit
/ Pittsburgh, PA / No Time For These:
/ Dancing
/ Lovey-Dovey
/ Fooling Around
/ Holding
/ Kissing / Things Known:
/ Don't Stand By Windows / Not Known
/ Real Name
/ What I Look Like / Things Had
/ Passports
/ Visas
/ Groceries (peanut butter)
/ Computers / Things Not Had
/ Speakers
/ Headphones
/ Records
/ Notebooks (burned) / {{It's been a while since I did a song lyric checklist. This is, of course, Talking Heads "Post-it Notes During Wartime".}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-02-05 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[A beam of light hitting Stonehenge from above, leaving strange jagged, glowing runes all around]] / Blue: Oops. / Pink: Seriously? Do you really think "Oops" covers it? / {{Look, I didn't mean to start some sort of magical apocalypse. Would it help if I said "My Bad" too?}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-02-12 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Two loading docks under banners for 'Zeno's Fine Greek Dining']] / A strip mall may not be the best of locations
/ But their food is really good
/ And the special of the day is always half price. / {{If you go, you should really try the "Achilles Tortoise Soup."}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-02-19 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[A cat studying an Asian book]] / Cat: A major Hong Kong movie studio is making a movie about the Egyptian gods. / Cat: Naturally, they've asked me to appear as myself in the starring role. / Cat: It's being made in China, so all of the movie's dialogue is in Meownderin. / Cat: But don't worry - there will also be subtitles in Catonese. / {{They're hoping to get John Mew to direct.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-02-26 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[A game of Pac-Man in progress]] / 25 cents abandon, ye who playeth in
/ These worlds in glowing colour I beheld
/ Writ upon the coin slot of a game, / And thereupon for spirits I did see
/ Within a azure maze forever trapped
/ Pursued unending by a golden mouth; / To flee from right to left, and left to right
/ As pellets, dots and fruit are all consum'd... / {{A lot of literary figures were big video game fans. Dante wrote quite eloquently about the horrible afterlives of Inky, Blinky, Pinky and Clyde. Homer was a huge fan of Battlezone. And, of course, Shakespeare wrote a whole play about Tempest.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-03-05 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Circuit board]] / Most people don't realize that modern electronics work because of magic smoke. / The smoke is stored in little canisters and black boxes. They're all stuck on green plastic and connected with tiny silver pipes. / If you don't believe me, there's a simple test. / Open up your computer or TV set and use a pair of wire clippers to break open some of the little cans. / Pretty soon, the magic smoke will leak out and everything will stop working. / {{Proving the existence of magic smoke is one of those science projects that you really shouldn't try at home. Go to a friend's house and try it there instead.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-03-12 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Straw poking into nearly empty paper cup of a bright green liquid]] / There is a frozen
/ mint flavored
/ drink / that is only available
/ for a few weeks
/ every year / It is highly addictive
/ and it is named
/ after its worst
/ withdrawl symptom / the "Shamrock Shakes." / {{There is no known cure for the Shamrock Shakes. The only hope to escape the cycle of addiction is to go cold turkey - by which I mean a MacTurkey Club with double cheese and a side order of fries.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-03-19 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Plaster cast of a cat's paw print]] / Ancient Egyptian burial rites involved ritual mummification, gold and treasures byond counting, and massive stone tombs. / My humans have decided to scatter my ashes in a planter full of catnip. / I think I win. / {{Isaak, June 13, 1995 - March 19, 2010.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-03-26 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Empty comic frames]] / Blue: I've been going through my notes for future comics and I have no idea what some of these mean. / Pink: What have you got? / Blue: "Work Study Hunchback." / Blue: "Canadian Bacon Wars." / Blue: "Spiral Bound Centerfold." / Blue: "The Way Things Go." / Pink: Wait, wasn't that last one the title of a movie you were telling me about? / Blue: Well crap! My "Movies to Get" notes and my "Future Comics" notes got mixed up. / Pink: I would _totally_ watch a movie about the Canadian Bacon Wars. / {{My penmanship has improved since the last time the Invisible Notebook made an appearance. The Way Things Go is a really nifty Rube Goldberg-esque art film that I highly recommend.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-04-02 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Train cars labeled "Beef Gravy," "Turkey Gravy" and "Pork Gravy"]] / Pink: How do you train gravy, anyway? / Blue: Pretty much like anything else, I suppose. You give it a series of challenges and rewards to encourage good behavior. / Pink: I think it's more like Pokemon - the gravy has to keep fighting progressively tougher enemies. / Blue: I choose you, Gravy-chu! / {{I originally did this as a guest strip for the (sadly now defunct) web comic "Gravytrain". Their main site is off line, but there's an archive of pre-2009 stuff on a blogspot site.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-04-09 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Turn of the century police talking to each other]] / Bowler: Pardon my asking, but how would you describe your lot? / Homburg: My lot? / Bowler: Yes... Would you say it is a happy one? / Homburg: It's not particularly happy, no. / Bowler: Hm. Mine isn't really very happy either. Someone should write a song about that. / {{Taking one consideration with another, it's not a good idea to generalize the experience of all policemen from just two individuals.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-04-16 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[SUV with window decals for the Chicago Cubs and the Detroit Lions]] / Sports futility vehicle. / {{The Lions haven't won a championship game since 1957. The Cubs last won the World Series in 1907.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-04-23 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Percolator coffee pot and cup of coffee]] / Pink: Hey, coffee! I didn't hear it percolating! / Blue: That's because of the Kona silence. / Pink: Don't get smart with me. / {{The Cone of Silence - despite its unsuitability for top secret government work - has a lot of practical applications in industrial architecture.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-04-30 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[A snowman with Christopher Walken's head]] / Walkin / in a winter / wonderland / {{There must have been some magic in that old silk hat they found...}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-05-07 |