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| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Canyon with distant village and highway sign]] / Sign: Welcome To Mos Eisley / Sign (written small): A Wretched Hive of Scum and Villainy / Obi-Wan: When I first visited here with my master Qui-Gon, the slogan was, "A Good Place to Raise Your Family." / Luke: Uncle Own told me that it used to say, "Jewel of the Sands." / Obi-Wan: As much as I hate the Empire, you've got to admire their "truth in labeling" laws. / {{The Mos Eisley Chamber of Commerce hasn't had much luck. The forced slogan change came right on the heels of a disastrous 'Sister City' exchange program with Zemoch, Sunnydale and Barad-d?r.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-05-14 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Crawdad holding up a wooden spoon in one claw]] / I'm not allergic to shellfish. / Crawdad (shouting): Vive le France! / Sometimes it just disagrees with me. / {{Guest art by my lovely and talented wife... It's based on a real event involving a marine biologist friend of hers who failed to cook an exceptionally cranky lobster. Lobster has been downsized to a crawdad here to save on bandwidth.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-05-21 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Old professor at blackboard holding his hands oddly]] / Prof: As you can see, the descending fingers of my right hand form a stylized letter "W". This indicates a generalized support for "West Coast" style rappers. More specifically, it is a request that they "Represent." / Prof: Take note of this. It will be on your final exam. / {{Don't let the suit fool you. According to the sylabus, 25% of your final grade is based on "keeping it real."}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-05-28 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Close up of a leafy plant]] / Pink: I'm thinking about planting some thyme in the herb garden, but I'm afraid it'll get into the neighbor's yard. / Blue: Well, if it won't stand still, I can understand that you'd want to keep it on your side. / Blue: And it'd be terrible to have too much of it on our hands. You don't want to waste it. / Blue: Still, if we do have a surplus we could save it in a bottle and donate it to some hospital. / Blue: From what I hear, it can heal all wounds. / Pink: Ok, you need to put on your "Shut Up" face, right now. / {{"Put on your 'shut up' face" is a couple steps past "Use your indoor voice."}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-06-04 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[A paper bag with handles]] / This ordinary-looking paper bag was recently donated to the "Paranormal Object Preservation Association." / Somehow, the fibers of the bag have been saturated with time-bending energy. / Every molecule of the bag is continually renewed on a sub-atomic level. It will never age and never decay. / It ain't no drag: P.O.P.A.'s got a brand new bag. / {{Not only is the bag invulnerable and eternal, but you can also use it to carry around your groceries.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-06-11 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Close up of a drinking glass full of noodles and brownish liquid]] / Drinks at a dance club are usually overpriced. / And it's hard for the bartender to hear your order. / Bartender: Who ordered the ramen Coke? / {{If it's too loud to hear yourself think, then it's too loud to order a drink.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-06-18 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Rice, cheese, spinach and a glass casserole dish]] / Blue: How about I make green and yellow rice for dinner? / Pink: Sounds good! I'll get some spinach. / Blue: That's unexpected. / Pink: Why? / Blue: Nobody expects the spinach acquisition! / {{Its chief weapons are surprise, fear, ruthless efficiency and a high concentration of vitamins and antioxidants.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-06-25 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Close-ups of three waistlines, one wearing blue tights with red shorts on the outside, the second wearing grey tights with blue shorts on the outside and the third wearing plain black pants]] / Proof that Wonder Woman / is smarter than both Superman / and Batman: / When they added pants to her costume / she put on her underwear / BEFORE she put on her trousers. / {{Don't worry comic book traditionalists! Just because she's not showing off her star-spangled panties doesn't mean that she's not still wearing them.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-07-02 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Split portrait of Robert Vaughn and Harrison Ford]] / Somewhere on the internet, there is a fan fiction story / that explains exactly how Han Solo and Napoleon Solo are related. / {{The United Network Command for Law and Enforcement works very closely with the Jedi Council of the New Republic.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-07-09 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Clamari with lemon and cocktail sauce]] / Blue: What are we having for dinner? / Pink: Calamari! / Blue: Tasty! What's the occasion? / Pink: It picked Italy to win in the World Cup. / {{The Psychic Squid Eugenics Program has very simple rules: accurate predictors get bred, inaccurate predictors get breaded.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-07-16 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Picture of Hugh Beaumont]] / This is Ward Cleaver / [[Portrait of J. S. Bach]] / This is Johann Sebastian Bach / [[Photo of a footprint]] / By comparing their footprints and the length of their stride, we've been able to determine that either Mr. Bach is enormously tall, or Mr. Cleaver is extremely short. / Two steps for Ward, one step Bach. / {{The US should have knuckled down in the 1970's and switched to the Metric system instead of measuring things in feet.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-07-23 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Worried looking blonde woman talking to a man with a deep sea crustacean head]] / Woman: Don't take this the wrong way, but when I told my friends that I was tired of dating "superficial, shallow guys" / Woman: and that I wanted to go out with "a deep one"... / Woman: You're not exactly what I had in mind. / {{If H. P. Lovecraft had written Banal Horror rather than the Edlritch variety, there would be more stories about the "Shallow Ones" and the "Young Things".}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-07-30 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Golf course with waves and ship's conning tower in the background]] / I had a strange dream that I had started a company... / We converted decommissioned aircraft carriers into floating golf courses. / Welcome aboard the USS 'Epic Water Hazard' / {{If you slice into the rough you're gonna need a four iron and some scuba gear.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-08-06 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Wooded path]] / According to Norse mythology, the magical helmet called the "Tarnhelm" allows the wearer to understand the language of birds. / Pink Bird: This is my tree here! / Blue Bird: Hey! / Green Bird: What?!? / Pink Bird: This is my tree here! / Blue Bird: Hey! / Green Bird: What?!? / Pink Bird: This is my tree here! / Blue Bird: Hey! / Green Bird: What?!? / Pink Bird: This is my tree here! / Blue Bird: I've got great plumage! / Green Bird: Cool! Let's make eggs! / This is - at best - a mixed blessing. / {{Birds generally talk about one of three things: food, sex, and territory. Picture a soap opera written by a hyperactive six year old with a potty mouth. Now imagine that you can't stop listening to it even if you really, really want to.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-08-13 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Movie poster]] / Mr. Lenny / Mr. George / Of Mice and Men In Black / {{Some day they'll have a little planet where they can settle down and not be bothered by aliens anymore.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-08-20 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | Common Force powers and their associated hand gestures: / [[Hand moving from left to right with middle, ring, and pinky fingers raised and index finger tucked behind thumb.]] / Force Suggestion / Obigreen: These are not the droids you're looking for. / [[Hand making crushing gesture]] / Force Choke / Darthred: I find your lack of faith disturbing. / [[Hand with index finger extended, moving upward. Distant X-wing also moving upward.]] / Force Lift / Yogreen: Do or do not. There is no try. / [[Control + Alt + Delete]] / Force Reboot / Aryello: #@*&*% %*& # $*@#!! / {{SUPERLASER.DLL not found in C:\DEATHSTAR\SYSTEM.DAT / Not ready firing main cannon
/ Abort, Retry, Fail?}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-08-27 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Shattered panels with rapidly moving clouds]] / I don't have dreams
/ that I'm falling. / I have dreams
/ that I'm pushing
/ all the people
/ who have dreams
/ that they're falling / {{It's slightly more common than the dream where I'm administering a final exam to a bunch of students who have never attended the class before.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-09-03 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Abstract alternating slices of Pringles cans]] / Blue: You know that oval guy with the mustache on the side of a Pringles can? / Pink: What about him? / Blue: Does he have a name? / Pink: It's probably on the Pringles website. / Blue: I'll be very disappointed if his name is not "Chris". / Pink: As in "Jolly old Chris Pringle?" You're crazy. / {{According to Wikipedia, the guy's name is "Julius Pringles." / I'm very disappointed.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-09-10 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Old British warships]] / Good Names for British Warships / HMS Implacable
/ - Served in the English Channel, the Adriatic Sea and the Mediterranean in WWI / HMS Illustrious
/ - The first British aircraft carrier to strike against an enemy fleet in 1940 / HTS Indomitable
/ - The world's first Battlecruiser, launched in 1907 / HMS Intrepid
/ - The Royal Navy has used this name for eight different ships from 1747 to 2008 / HMS Indefatigable
/ - Memorialized in the "Horatio Hornblower" books, the actual ship captured nearly thirty enemy vessels between 1784 and 1816 / Bad Names for British Warships / HMS Insubordinate
/ - Launched in 1880, crew mutiny in 1881, 1883, 1884, 1885 (twice) and 1888 / HMS Impractical
/ - The world's first submersible aircraft carrier, this ship sank due to a faulty screen door. / HMS Inflammable
/ - Burned to the waterline when launched in 1927. / HMS Inconsequential
/ - This ship has distinguished itself by having never done anything to distinguish itself. / HMS Indescribable
/ - Well.. It's this sort of... Thing. / {{I've heard some interesting stories about the HMS Implausible as well, but I just don't belive them.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-09-17 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Armed cowboys on a subway platform]] / Desperados waiting for a train. / [[Armed cowboys in a playground]] / Desperados waiting for a turn on the swings. / {{For desperados, they're actually pretty polite.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-09-24 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Garden section of big-box home improvement store]] / Customer: Hey there! Where would I find books on gardening? / Clerk: Down aisle three on the left, if you get to sprinkler systems you've gone too far. You can't miss them. Just remember, "Prose before Hose." / {{The entire home improvement store is organized in a similar fashion. They have a beer cooler near the paint department just so thay can say, "Brews before Hues."}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-10-01 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Close-up of extremely wild eyebrow]] / Pink: You're staring at something. What is it? / Blue: Epic eyebrows. They're like the mutant offspring of Abe Vigoda's and Andy Rooney's eyebrows. / Pink: That bad? / Blue: With a little wax, he could make a handlebar mustache above each eye. / Pink: Well, if they bother you so much, stop looking at them. / Blue: I can't help it. I'm transfixed like a deer, staring into the oncoming eyebrows. / [[Betty Davis eyes with Thufir Hawat eyebrows.]] http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-10-08 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Shadowy figure in a cave, holding a torch]] / Most people see this picture and think: "It's someone in a cave with a torch." / I see this and think: "World's Hottest Ice Cream Cone." / {{It's very difficult to get ice cream to combust without also setting the cone on fire.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-10-15 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[1960's computer lab with giant printer]] / Bowtie: No, no, no! Why does this say "Paper Jam" when there is no paper jam? And now it's flashing "PC Load Letter." / Polkadot: Don't worry! It should be easy to fix. Heck, the way technology is advancing, I'll be that pretty soon nobody will ever see those errors again. / {{Sometimes, when working with a malfunctioning printer, I feel an intense desire to see if I can debug it with a ballpeen hammer.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-10-22 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Milk carton with picture of man wearing sunglasses and with his head wrapped in bandages]] / Have You Seen Me? / Dr. Hawley "Jack" Griffen / Last seen at the Lion's Head Inn in the village of Iping / If you know anything about his disappearance, please contact Dr. Arthur Kemp, London / {{I was thinking of wearing an Invisible Man costume this year, but I just couldn't see myself in it.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-10-29 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Kittens]] / Pink: Seven years this week! / Blue: Yep! And the traditional anniversary gift is... WOOL! / Pink: Seriously? Wool? / Blue: It's either that or copper. / Pink: Fab. Let me see what the modern gift is.... Huh. Desk sets. / Blue: How romantic. Ok, new plan: our post-modern seventh anniversary gift is now KITTENS. / Pink: I like this plan. / {{I'm sure some of these kittens will be showing up again in the comic...}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-11-05 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Wooden bucket]] / Eliza: Hello Henry, I am the Psychotherapist. Please, describe your problems. / Henry: There's a hole in my bucket, dear Liza, dear Liza. / Eliza: Liza? Hah! I would appreciate it if you would continue. / Henry: There's a hole in my bucket, dear Liza, a hole. / Eliza: Are you sure? / Henry: With what shall I fix it, dear Liza, dear Liza? / Eliza: I believe you have inhibitions with Liza. / Henry: With what shall I fix it, dear Liza, with what? / Eliza: Why do you say, "With what shall I fix it, dear Liza, with what?" / {{Free advice is worth every penny}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-11-12 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Rainbow pattern of glowing lines]] / In Star Wars / Lightsabers can be any color -
/ - unless your name is "Darth-Something." / Then you're pretty much stuck with red. / In some ways, a Lightsaber is like a mood ring.
/ An incredibly lethal mood ring. / {{Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to serious limitations in your abilities to accessorize.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-11-19 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Flour-less chocolate cake with chocolate frosting]] / Waiter: I'm afraid we're out of "Death by Chocolate." Would you like to try some "Maimed by Chocolate?" / {{They also have some "Horribly Scarred by Chocolate." It's made with carob.}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-11-26 |
| Quirk's Evil Little Webcomic | [[Mr. Potato Head in front of the Tate Gallery]] / Taters gonna Tate. / {{Contrary to rumor, the Tate Gallery in London is not named after the error-prone inventor, Professor Charles Tate. Profesor Tate is famous for creating a 'reprogrammable' electromagnetic compass which could be calibrated to point to any direction, not just magnetic North. Unfortunately, although the design was brilliant, problems with manufacture resulted in huge amounts of drift, rendering the compasses useless, and inspiring the phrase: "He who has a Tate's is lost."}} http://quirkspace.com/comic/index.php?date=2010-12-03 |