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| You Are Reading the Ugly Hill Comic from Monday, November 7, 2005 | SNUG: How does a place that's only open six weeks a year accumulate so much JUNK?
/ ELI (looks in a box): I don't think it's just Halloween stuff down here... / [[ELI pulls a stuffed rabbit from the box.]]
/ ELI: I'm seeing Easter, Christmas, and Valentine's Day crap, too. / [[SNUG sees a figurine of... http://uglyhill.com/d/20051107.html |
| You Are Reading the Ugly Hill Comic from Tuesday, November 8, 2005 | MATT: My name is Matt Black. I worked here five years ago when this place was "UNCLE STUMPY'S INDEPENDENCE DAY EXPLOSION." / SNUG: I KNEW you looked familiar! Didn't I buy a gross of salutes from you once?
/ MATT: PFFT! Not bloody likely... / MATT: I was probably the laziest stock boy that ever lived.... http://uglyhill.com/d/20051108.html |
| You Are Reading the Ugly Hill Comic from Wednesday, November 9, 2005 | MATT: Hey, you guys gotta do somethin' for me.
/ SNUG: Anything to get out of cleaning this dump, Casper. / MATT: Yeah well, that's the thing. My body is buried somewhere in here under five year's worth of overstock. And as long as IT stays here, so do I. / [[ELI still holds a box as a shield.]]
/ ELI:... http://uglyhill.com/d/20051109.html |
| You Are Reading the Ugly Hill Comic from Thursday, November 10, 2005 | SNUG: Hey, do you mind if I talk to my friend alone for a minute, Matt?
/ MATT: I'll still be dead when you get back. / [[SNUG talks to ELI.]]
/ SNUG: Dude, we could end up cleaning this entire basement looking for this LOSER'S corpse!
/ ELI (appalled): Are you really that LAZY?! This poor slob is doomed... http://uglyhill.com/d/20051110.html |
| You Are Reading the Ugly Hill Comic from Friday, November 11, 2005 | MATT (dejectedly): So your friend isn't gonna help?
/ ELI: Nope. He'd rather vegetate than help find your body. I apologize on his behalf. / [[SNUG is ignoring both of them.]]
/ MATT: Oh, that's okay, it's his decision. But over the years, reflecting back on my OWN wasted days, I've come to regret... http://uglyhill.com/d/20051111.html |
| You Are Reading the Ugly Hill Comic from Monday, November 14, 2005 | [[ELI is sweaty and rubbing his neck.]]
/ ELI: I thought you said your body was under the plastic vampire teeth?
/ MATT: I thought it WAS. Maybe it's over by the fake blood. / SNUG: HA! I told you man, that ghost is runnin' you all over this basement like a SUCKER!
/ MATT: OOH! It's under the box of... http://uglyhill.com/d/20051114.html |
| You Are Reading the Ugly Hill Comic from Tuesday, November 15, 2005 | [[ELI is reporting back to JARED, who reacts as expected.]]
/ JARED: YOU FOUND A WHAT?! IN THE WHERE?!
/ ELI: A dead body, in the sub-basement sir. / ELI: While we were cleaning down there, we met the ghost of a former employee, Matt Black. He had been crushed under a palette of clown wigs five years... http://uglyhill.com/d/20051115.html |
| You Are Reading the Ugly Hill Comic from Wednesday, November 16, 2005 | [[ELI holds a box in one hand and a toy jack-o-lantern in the other. He's delighted.]]
/ ELI: Hey, new Halloween decorations! Thanks, man!
/ SNUG: I felt bad about making you do all the work and then getting you fired. Sorry. / ELI: That's okay, but aren't you supposed to be at work RIGHT NOW?
/ SNUG:... http://uglyhill.com/d/20051116.html |
| You Are Reading the Ugly Hill Comic from Thursday, November 17, 2005 | [[HASTINGS in the warehouse.]]
/ HASTINGS: TITO? Tito, are you back here?
/ TITO: Here I am, Mr. Kilgore! I was just adjusting my back brace. / HASTINGS: Don't you have scheduled BREAKS for that? I was due to receive a package yesterday, and it hasn't arrived. / [[HASTINGS notices a box marked "Property... http://uglyhill.com/d/20051117.html |
| You Are Reading the Ugly Hill Comic from Friday, November 18, 2005 | Hastings Kilgore: Did you know that Elliott is storing personal effects in the company warehouse, Peter?
/ Peter Wipp: I don't know anything you don't tell me, sir. / Hastings: Good answer, just like we practiced. But look at this crate I found back there this morning! And do you know what it contains?
/ Peter:... http://uglyhill.com/d/20051118.html |
| You Are Reading the Ugly Hill Comic from Monday, November 21, 2005 | Peter Wipp: You haven't spoken to Miss Mudrick since she started two weeks ago. Are you sure you want to open up with a complaint?
/ Hastings Kilgore: Once again, Elliott is abusing company resources. He must be stopped. / Hastings: And seeing as I no longer wield the power to do anything about it, I... http://uglyhill.com/d/20051121.html |
| You Are Reading the Ugly Hill Comic from Tuesday, November 22, 2005 | Samantha Mudrick: Oh hi, Hastings. Come on in. How are you?
/ Hastings Kilgore: Good afternoon, Miss Mudrick. I have been better. / Hastings: I found a coworker's personal effects stored in the warehouse. Care to explain?
/ Miss Mudrick: Elliott's going through a rough patch and I said he could store... http://uglyhill.com/d/20051122.html |
| You Are Reading the Ugly Hill Comic from Wednesday, November 23, 2005 | Samantha Mudrick: I can't adopt your management style! I don't even own any brass knuckles. / Hastings Kilgore: You can rent! Do you want to be taken adventage of?
/ Miss Mudrick: Of course not. But I don't think letting Eliott store some stuff in the warehouse is that bad. / Hastings: I disagree. You... http://uglyhill.com/d/20051123.html |
| You Are Reading the Ugly Hill Comic from Thursday, November 24, 2005 | Samantha Mudrick: Listen Hastings, this is all great advice you've given me, but I just don't think I can manage this way.
/ Hastings Kilgore: Explain. / Mrs. Mudrick: Well, see, I like to be nice! I think if you're nice to people, they'll be nice to you!
/ Hastings: Ugh! Where did you go to business... http://uglyhill.com/d/20051124.html |
| You Are Reading the Ugly Hill Comic from Friday, November 25, 2005 | Elliott Krauthammer: So, how about that Miss Mudrick? She's one classy dame.
/ Hastings Kilgore: She has the spine of a sea sponge. Of course you like her... / Hastings: You've taken advantage of her terminal kindness to acquire special privileges. / Elliott: What do you me--
/ Hastings: But don't worry.... http://uglyhill.com/d/20051125.html |
| You Are Reading the Ugly Hill Comic from Monday, November 28, 2005 | ELI: Hey, I just talked to Uncle Vince. Looks like he won't be going to Mom's for Thanksgiving this year.
/ HASTINGS: That's fine, neither will we. Also, Vince is a MORON. / ELI: But we're bringing the turkey this year. Mom will eviscerate us.
/ HASTINGS: My new boss likes being NICE to people... / HASTINGS:... http://uglyhill.com/d/20051128.html |
| You Are Reading the Ugly Hill Comic from Tuesday, November 29, 2005 | [[HASTINGS is on the phone.]]
/ HASTINGS: Is this Emmett? Yes, this is your cousin Hastings calling with a change in plans for Thanksgiving. / HASTINGS: We won't be meeting at my mother's house this year, but rather 287 Poisonwood Drive, cubicle 813... / HASTINGS: Yes, that's my office. WHY? Well,... http://uglyhill.com/d/20051129.html |
| You Are Reading the Ugly Hill Comic from Wednesday, November 30, 2005 | [[HASTINGS has his Thanksgiving turkey set out on his desk, along with a big bowl of mashed potatoes.]]
/ MUDRICK: Hey, that's some lunch, Hastings!
/ HASTINGS: This is not my LUNCH, Miss Mudrick... / HASTINGS: I have decided to hold my family Thanksgiving dinner here, at the office... / HASTINGS:... http://uglyhill.com/d/20051130.html |
| You Are Reading the Ugly Hill Comic from Thursday, December 1, 2005 | [[MUDRICK is happily enjoying Thanksgiving dinner at the office. ELI and HASTINGS watch in the background.]]
/ ELI: Your boss doesn't seem as angry as you'd hoped, man.
/ HASTINGS: Give it time, Eli... / HASTINGS: Soon she'll realize she's missing Thanksgiving with her OWN family and snap. She is... http://uglyhill.com/d/20051201.html |
| You Are Reading the Ugly Hill Comic from Friday, December 2, 2005 | HASTINGS: So, I'm sure there are OTHER PLACES you'd rather be right now, Miss Mudrick?
/ MUDRICK: Well, sure. It's Thanksgiving, after all... / MUDRICK: But I don't play favorites, Hastings. It just wouldn't be fair for me to let Elliott store a box in the warehouse and then not let you eat Thanksgiving... http://uglyhill.com/d/20051202.html |
| You Are Reading the Ugly Hill Comic from Monday, December 5, 2005 | HASTINGS (very grim): I guess you win. You have bent over backwards to accommodate my demands, and I know when I have been beaten. / HASTINGS (forehead vein!): But know THIS, my friend. Giving in to your employees' every whim and fancy can only sustain you for so long... / HASTINGS: Soon there will... http://uglyhill.com/d/20051205.html |
| You Are Reading the Ugly Hill Comic from Tuesday, December 6, 2005 | ELI: Your boss is so NICE! You were such a jerk, and she didn't even react at all!
/ HASTINGS: She is a robot with a heart of frosted metal. / ELI: NO, I think she just lets things roll off her back. If YOU tried that once in a while, it might... / < http://uglyhill.com/d/20051206.html |
| You Are Reading the Ugly Hill Comic from Wednesday, December 7, 2005 | [[Eli Kilgore is listening to the radio on headphones]]
/ DJ: Hey, you're listening to WGLY, the rock of Maulington, and have we got an early Christmas present for you!
/ DJ: Did someone say "Skulldrift"?! / DJ: Everyone remembers the punishing, driving riffs of "Ribcage Chandelier", and the romantic... http://uglyhill.com/d/20051207.html |
| You Are Reading the Ugly Hill Comic from Thursday, December 8, 2005 | Eli Kilgore: I did it! I won tickets to "Skulldrift"!
/ Snug Snugsworth: What? That band you liked in high school? / Eli: I spent four years of my life with headphones grafted to my head listening to their eight studio albums and three live bootleg tapes! / Snug: Man, playin' fast don't equal playin'... http://uglyhill.com/d/20051208.html |
| You Are Reading the Ugly Hill Comic from Friday, December 9, 2005 | Snug:Wait, this concert is tonight?! It's Christmas Eve!
/ Eli:That's the best part! / Eli:Skulldrift is planning a huge comeback, and it's all kicking off tonight! Only diehard fans will be there!
/ Snug:Well I don't know if I can go, man. My mom would flip if I wasn't home on Christmas morning. / Snug:Hey,... http://uglyhill.com/d/20051209.html |
| You Are Reading the Ugly Hill Comic from Monday, December 12, 2005 | Eli: You gotta come with me! I don't wanna go to a Skulldrift show by myself!
/ Snug: Well I can't go. Why don't you ask your brother? / Hastings: Ask me what?
/ Eli: Uh, you wouldn't be interested. / Snug: Eli wants to go to a concert on Christmas Eve. Wanna go with him?
/ Hastings: Not unless they've... http://uglyhill.com/d/20051212.html |
| You Are Reading the Ugly Hill Comic from Tuesday, December 13, 2005 | Eli: Please! Please! Please! Please! Please! Please!
/ Snug: All right! Fine! I'll go to the stupid concert! / Snug: But you gotta promise we'll be home by 5am at the latest. Mom will be heartbroken if I'm not home for Christmas. / Eli: Ooh, of course! No problem, man! The show will be over by 2am!... http://uglyhill.com/d/20051213.html |
| You Are Reading the Ugly Hill Comic from Wednesday, December 14, 2005 | Snug: THREE HOURS IN LINE?! UGH, I GOTTA PEE..
/ Eli: I HOPE WE DIDN'T MISS THE OPENING ACT. / Eli: OOH, NOPE! "EYE-ROCKET" HASN'T EVEN SET UP YET!
/ Snug: WHERE ARE OUR SEATS?
/ Eli: DIDN'T I TELL YOU? / Eli: THEY SAID WE COULD GIVE UP OUR SEATS FOR BACKSTAGE PASSES IF WE DIDN'T MIND WALKING AROUND DURING... http://uglyhill.com/d/20051214.html |
| You Are Reading the Ugly Hill Comic from Thursday, December 15, 2005 | Snug: You know I can't go backstage with you after the show, right? I gotta get home.
/ Eli: No! Come on! I can't go by myself! / Snug: Why not? You're the one who loves this stupid band so much!
/ Eli: Well, yeah, but... if you haven't noticed, I don't fit in too well with this crowd. / [[ Eli glances... http://uglyhill.com/d/20051215.html |
| You Are Reading the Ugly Hill Comic from Friday, December 16, 2005 | < http://uglyhill.com/d/20051216.html |
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