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| Back to School - Isaac Newton | Newton: I cannot believe I failed PHYS 101.
/ girl: Yeah Isaac Newton, you basically invented classical mechanics! / Newton: Yes, but I started to "freak out" on the examination. I thought gravity went up, and I felt dizzy while trying to answer a question about rotational dynamics. / girl: Wow, that... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2006/09/newton.html |
| Back to School - Zeus | Zeus: I can't believe I failed Greek Mythology.
/ boy: But Zeus, you are Greek myth. How did that happen? / Zeus: Do you know how many lady-gods I've knocked boots with? Mnemosyne, Euronyme, Semele... If I can't remember their names when I wake up next to them, how am I supposed to remember them on the... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2006/09/zeus.html |
| Back to School - Alexander Graham Bell | Bell: I can't believe I failed History of Communications.
/ girl: But you're Alexander Graham Bell, inventor of the telephone!
/ < http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2006/10/bell.html |
| Back to School - Sigmund Freud | Freud: I can't believe I failed Psychoanalysis 101.
/ boy: What was the problem, Freud? / Freud: Well I was up all night studying, but when I got to the exam I forgot all the young girls in the revealing clothes of modern society. ...I mean, answers. / Freud: I totally messed up the question about coeds... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2006/10/freud.html |
| Back to School - Jesus | Jesus: I can't believe I failed Divinity 101.
/ girl: I can't believe my dog died this morning. / Jesus: Yeah, I'm pretty sure we were talking about me just now.
/ girl: It's so sad. She's been my friend for a long time. / Jesus: I am the way, the truth, and the most important part of any conversation.
/ girl:... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2006/10/jesus.html |
| Back to School - Immanuel Kant | Kant: I can't believe I failed Intro to Ethics.
/ boy: You, Immanuel Kant, failed an ethics class? / Kant: I got distracted! And angry. All these kids paying thousands of dollars to sit in class checking MySpace on their laptops. I ought to change my Categorical Imperative: If you have the luxury of... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2006/10/kant.html |
| Back to School - Paul McCartney | Paul: I can't believe I failed Popular Music After 1945.
/ boy: I must admit I'm surprised, Paul McCartney. / Paul: I just get so bewildered by anything after the 1980's. Rock today sounds like a pack of feral dogs biting sheets of corrugated iron. And don't get me started on "urban" music. / boy: Not... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2006/10/mccartney.html |
| Back to School - Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart | Mozart: I can't believe I failed Art of Listening.
/ girl: But Mozart, you're a musical genius! / Mozart: They kept talking about such horrible composers. Beethoven! I could compose circles around him any day.
/ girl: I like his music. Ba-ba-ba BUM... Ba-ba-ba-BUM...
/ Mozart: We all know how it goes. / girl:... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2006/10/mozart.html |
| Back to School - Spooky Edition | Ghost: I can't believe I failed Haunting 101.
/ zombie boy: But you're a g-g-g-g-ghost!
/ zombie boy: (braaaaaaains) / Ghost: True, zombie student, but even ghosts can make mistakes. Actually, mistakes are why I'm still stuck on earth instead of moving on to the afterlife. / zombie boy: You mean you... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2006/10/spooky.html |
| Back to School - Joan of Arc | Joan: I can't believe I failed 15th Century French History.
/ girl: But you lived those events, Joan of Arc. / Joan: Yeah, but I got caught cheating during the exam, so they failed me.
/ girl: Let me guess: you prayed to God again?
/ Joan: Yep. / Joan: Except this time he wanted everyone to know he spoke... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2006/11/arc.html |
| Back to School - Allen Breed | Breed: I can't believe I failed Automotive Safety Tech 101.
/ girl: I can't do this anymore, Allen Breed, inventor of the air bag. / Breed: What?
/ girl: We've always known this couldn't last forever, this farce. I'm a student, you're an inventor. It wasn't meant to be. / Breed: Um, I ...
/ girl: Damn... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2006/11/breed.html |
| Back to School - Julius Caesar | Caesar: I can't believe I failed Latin.
/ girl: I thought Latin was what you Romans spoke, Julius Caesar. / Caesar: Yeah, but I've watched that damn Shakespeare play about me so many times I've forgotten everything but "Et tu Brute". And I never said that in real life. Who gets all eloquent while being... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2006/11/caesar.html |
| Back to School - Noam Chomsky | Chomsky: I can't believe I failed Intro to Linguistics.
/ boy: But Wikipedia says you're a famous linguist, Noam Chomsky! / Chomsky: Don't even get me started. Did you know that Wikipedia's article about Star Wars is longer than its article about World War II?*
/ [[footnote]] *Probably not true. / boy:... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2006/11/chomsky.html |
| Back to School - Confucius | Confucius: I can't believe I failed Eastern Philosophy.
/ boy: That's not cool, Confucius. / boy: Did you bribe your prof like I suggested?
/ Confucius: No! Is it not said, "Riches and honors acquired by unrighteousness are as a floating cloud"? / boy: Ah, but isn't it also said, "I'll take my A+ while... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2006/11/confucius.html |
| Back to School - Marie Curie | Curie: I can't believe I failed Radioactive Chemistry.
/ girl: But Marie Curie, that stuff is your specialty! / Curie: I was pretty hungover when I wrote the exam. After what happened the night before, they should award me the Nobel Prize for Pukology. / Curie: My head hurt so bad I just wrote "I DISCOVERED... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2006/11/curie.html |
| Back to School - Charles Darwin | Darwin: I can't believe I failed Evolutionary Biology.
/ girl: That must be embarrassing, Charles Darwin. / Darwin: Well I've changed my mind since the 19th Century. Now I'm pretty sure God created humans and the other animals about six thousand years ago. / girl: Doesn't that contradict scientific... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2006/11/darwin.html |
| Back to School - Steve Jobs | Jobs: i can't believe I failed Comp Sci.
/ boy: I thought you were famous computer guy Steve Jobs. / Jobs: Yes, I co-invented the first Apple computer. Man, I feel like a PC: I just crashed.
/ boy: Huh? / Jobs: That's got to be a first for a Mac.
/ boy: ...Oh, is this about the whole Mac-vs-PC thing?... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2006/11/jobs.html |
| Back to School - Shakespeare | Shakespeare: I can't believe I failed ENGL 315: Shakespeare.
/ boy: Um... You are Shakespeare. / Shakespeare: Yeah, but I didn't actually write most of those plays. I'd never even read Twelfth Night until five in the morning the night before the exam. You ever read that one? Weird, let me tell you. Friggin'... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2006/11/shakespeare.html |
| Back to School - Picasso | Picasso: I can't believe I failed Modern Art.
/ boy: Maybe it's because your paintings look like they were drawn by two-year-olds, Picasso. / Picasso: Not this again... Look, if you think you can do better, shut up and do it. Hell, if it's any good I'll be first in line to buy a copy. / boy: Hey listen,... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2006/12/picasso.html |
| Back to School - Dan Brown | Brown: I can't believe I failed Art History.
/ boy: But Dan Brown, I thought you wrote the Da Vinci Code! / Brown: I am so sick of hearing about that book. Besides, it was mostly made up stuff.
/ boy: Oh my God! / boy: Are you saying that Tom Hanks isn't actually claustrophobic? / Brown: Um... I meant... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/01/brown.html |
| Back to School - Albert Einstein | Einstein: I can't believe I failed Relativity.
/ girl: What is all that about anyway, Einstein? / Einstein: It's the theory that really massive things bend space-time.
/ girl: ... / girl: ... / Einstein: Oh god, you're trying to think up a "your mom" joke, aren't you?
/ girl: I was working on "relativity",... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/01/einstein.html |
| Back to School - Sherlock Holmes | Sherlock: I can't believe I failed Forensic Science.
/ boy: That doesn't make sense, Sherlock Holmes. / Sherlock: I just can't get my mind off that news program I saw.
/ boy: Oh god... For the last time, they were lesbians. / Sherlock: Why didn't the reporter say anything about the girls' husbands?
/ boy:... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/01/holmes.html |
| Back to School - Pythagoras | Pythagoras: I can't believe I failed Geometry.
/ girl: Surprising, since the Pythagorean theorem was named after you, Pythagoras. / Pythagoras: It's hard to succeed when you don't have your group of mystical numerologists around to whisper answers to you.
/ girl: I've heard of them - the Pythagoreans?... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/01/pythagoras.html |
| Back to School - Adam Smith | Smith: I can't believe I failed Microeconomics.
/ girl: Who are you?
/ Smith: I'm famous 18th-century economist Adam Smith. I practically invented Capitalism. / girl: Listen buddy, the only people who would put the words "famous" and "economist" in teh same sentence are economy nerds. And I am way too... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/01/smith.html |
| Back to School - Buddha | Buddha: I can't believe I failed Enlightenment 101.
/ girl: Sweet Jumpin' McGillicutty, it's the Buddha! / Buddha: Your enthusiasm heartens me, but the fact remains that I have failed to reach nirvana in the required three months. / girl: Who cares about marks anyway? I bet your prof doesn't have a... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/02/buddha.html |
| Back to School - Werner Heisenberg | Heisenberg: I can't believe I failed Quantum Mechanics.
/ boy: Wasn't that your specialty, Werner Heisenberg? / Heisenberg: Well, not exactly. I mean...
/ boy: Weren't you, in fact, one of the founders of QM? / Heisenberg: I guess so, maybe...
/ boy: Isn't quantum physics based on your Uncertainty Principle? / Heisenberg:... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/02/heisenberg.html |
| Back to School - Indiana Jones | Indy: I can't believe I failed Archeology.
/ girl: Well, you're not much of an archeologist, Indiana Jones. / Indy: Oh right, that must have been some other guy who found the Ark of the Covenant. I thought it was me, but it must have been somebody else. ASS. / girl: Too bad they don't offer a course... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/02/jones.html |
| Back to School - Ferdinand Magellan | Magellan: I can't believe I failed geography.
/ boy: Weren't you the first person to circumnavigate the globe, Ferdinand Magellan? / Magellan: Technically. But it was mostly an accident.
/ boy: How do you sail around the world by accident? / Magellan: Well, I was trying to get to the Spice Islands, but... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/02/magellan.html |
| Back to School - Michelangelo | Michelangelo: I can't believe I failed Art History.
/ girl: Yeah Michelangelo, you are art history. / Michelangelo: It's this damn cold. I'm drowning in mucus.
/ girl: Well that's disgusting. / Michelangelo: I couldn't think straight so I just doodled a bunch of naked stauesque dudes on my exam. Now... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/02/michelangelo.html |
| Back to School - Edgar Allan Poe | Poe: I can't believe I failed Macabre Lit 101.
/ boy: Aw. Cheer up, Edgar Allan Poe.
/ Poe: I don't see what there is to be cheery about. / boy: Hey, is that... Are you wearing makeup? What did I tell you about hanging out with those goth kids? You know they're bad news! / Poe: But Tim said...
/ boy:... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/02/poe.html |
| Back to School - Oscar Wilde | Wilde: i can't believe I failed Flamboyant Witticisms 101.
/ boy: That course seems right up your alley, Oscar Wilde. / Wilde: Witty comments don't grow on trees! It gets so exhausting being Oscar Wilde, you know. Every time I open my mouth people get that look like, "Oh, this is gonna be good". / boy:... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/02/wilde.html |
| Back to School - Thomas Edison | Edison: I can't believe I failed Intro to Inventing.
/ girl: What was the exam like, Thomas Edison? / Edison: We had to come up with a new invention every fifteen minutes. It was exhausting. / girl: You couldn't keep up?
/ Edison: After two hours I started repeating myself. / Edison: ...Plus I eventually... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/03/edison.html |
| Back to School - Corey Hart | Corey: I can't believe I failed 80's Pop Music.
/ boy: I can't either, Corey Hart. / Corey: If only they hadn't scheduled the exam at night. It was so hard to see.
/ boy: Oh god, not the sunglasses again. / Corey: I have a responsibility to my fans!
/ boy: You wrote that song more than two decades ago,... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/03/hart.html |
| Back to School - Gordie Howe | Howe: I can't believe I failed Hockey 101.
/ girl: I don't think that course exists, Gordie Howe. / Howe: Hmm... I did wonder why they kept talking about opportunity cost and efficient markets theory.
/ girl: Sounds like you were in an economics class, Mr Hockey. / Howe: I guess that explains the fight...
/ girl:... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/03/howe.html |
| Back to School - King Tut | King Tut: I can't believe I failed Egyptian History.
/ boy: That reminds me, King Tut... / boy: Aren't you technically a mummy?
/ King Tut: Well yeah, but it's not like in the movies. / boy: How did that whole mummy thing start?
/ King Tut: The explorers who entered my tomb in the 20's woke me from my... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/03/tut.html |
| Back to School - Frida Kahlo | Frida: I can't believe I failed Modern Mexican Art.
/ girl: That sucks, Frida Kahlo. / Frida: I think the prof was mad because I once had an affair with Trotsky.
/ girl: Goddamn Stalinist. / Frida: No, she was just jealous. She told me she's loved me ever since she first laid eyes on my painting "Self-Portrait... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/04/kahlo.html |
| Back to School - Super Mario | Mario: Mama mia, I can't believe I failed my Video Games class!
/ girl: But Mario, you don't play video games, you're just in them. / Mario: You'd think I'd have learned a thing or two after hours of stomping on those damn turtles.
/ girl: What was the deal with those freaks? / Mario: Nothing in that... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/04/mario.html |
| Back to School - Moses | Moses: I can't believe I failed Jewish Studies.
/ boy: Moses? Aren't you in the Christian Bible? / Moses: Well... Yes, but I was totally Jewish. Hell, so was Jesus.
/ boy: SHUT UP. / Moses: No, it's true, I watched his bris from Jewish Heaven.
/ boy: Aw, dude, I did not need to hear that. / Moses: Must... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/04/moses.html |
| Back to School - Harry Potter | Harry: I can't believe I failed Wizardry.
/ girl: I am so in love with you, Harry Potter. / Harry: Uh... You know I'm about half your age, right?
/ girl: Every little thing you do is magic. / Harry: I hardly even know you.
/ girl: That sly come-hither stare... it's witchcraft! / Harry: Are you just quoting... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/04/potter.html |
| Back to School - Steven Spielberg | Spielberg: I can't believe I failed Film Directing.
/ boy: Maybe your prof watched "A.I.", Steven Spielberg. / Spielberg: Shut up or I'll beat you senseless with one of my many Oscars or other prestigious awards. / Spielberg: Besides, once Jurassic Park IV comes out, people will forget all about my... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/04/spielberg.html |
| Back to School - Zeus again | Zeus: I can't believe I failed Greek Mythology again.
/ boy: Is your love life still too complex, Zeus? / Zeus: Hey, shacking up with all them lady-gods ain't exactly a problem. / boy: Ha ha! Oh Zeus, you haven't changed a bit, you ignorant jackass. / Zeus: Actually, I have changed my policy of not... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/04/zeus.html |
| Back to School - Gandhi | Gandhi: I can't believe I failed Passive Resistance 101.
/ boy: How did they test you on that, Gandhi? / Gandhi: They set us up in a small country which was being ruled by colonial powers, and we had three hours to gain independence.
/ boy: Jesus! / Gandhi: I sat around not eating the whole time, but... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/05/gandhi.html |
| Back to School - Abraham Lincoln | Lincoln: I can't believe I failed American History 101.
/ boy: I loved that movie, Abe Lincoln. / Lincoln: First of all, I was talking about a course, not the movie.
/ boy: I've never been very good with Roman numerals. / Lincoln: Second, how can you "love" something so horribly violent?
/ boy: Oh man,... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/05/lincoln.html |
| Back to School - Oscar the Grouch | Oscar: I can't believe I failed Grouchiness 101.
/ girl: Oscar the Grouch! You smell terrible. / Oscar: I do live in a garbage can.
/ girl: What are you supposed to be, anyway? / Oscar: I was human, once. Just like you.
/ girl: Oh my god... What happened? / Oscar: Jim Henson abducted me. I woke up two... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/05/oscar.html |
| Back to School - Elvis Presley | Elvis: I can't believe I failed Rock 'N' Roll 101.
/ girl: I believe that, Elvis.
/ Elvis: Hey little missy, I'm the King of Rock 'N' Roll. / girl: Yes, but your style and most of your songs were stolen from the black subculture, and then watered down to be accepted by a mass white audience. / Elvis:... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/05/presley.html |
| Back to School - Queen Victoria | Victoria: I can't believe I failed British Monarchy 101.
/ boy: Did you forget to study, Queen Victoria? / Victoria: No, I was just distracted by everyone taking shots at me.
/ boy: Punches?
/ Victoria: Gunshots. / Victoria: People forget that I was almost assassinated like eight times while I was Queen.
/ boy:... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/05/victoria.html |
| Back to School - Cleopatra | Cleopatra: I can't believe I failed Egyptian History.
/ girl: Cleopatra! I, uh... / girl: Ok, I don't actually know who you are.
/ Cleopatra: Oh, come on! Last Egyptian Pharaoh... Lover to both Caesar and Antony... / girl: Well, your name definitely sounds familiar.
/ Cleopatra: I've been portrayed by... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/06/cleopatra.html |
| Back to School - René Descartes | René Descartes: I can't believe I failed Modern Western Philosophy.
/ girl: Hey, it's René Descartes! "I think therefore I am," right? Fabulous! / René Descartes: Well, that particular précis is usually misinterpreted, but...
/ girl: So if you stopped thinking, would you cease to exist? Ha! / René Descartes:... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/06/descartes.html |
| Back to School - Rasputin | Rasputin: I can't believe I failed Russian Magic 101.
/ boy: Gasp! It's Rasputin, the legendary Russian Magician! / Rasputin: Yes, it is I! The Mad Monk, The Invincible Tsarist...
/ boy: The Seditious Soviet...
/ Rasputin: That is not one of my nicknames and it is ridiculous besides. / boy: I heard about... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/06/rasputin.html |
| Back to School - The Sun | Sun: I can't believe I failed History of the Solar System.
/ boy: But you saw it all happen, Sun! / Sun: Yeah, I guess I was just busy burning with the power of a trillion nuclear bombs.
/ boy: I'm just saying... / Sun: What astounds me is that they would fail the object responsible for their very existence.
/ boy:... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/06/sun.html |
| Back to School - J. R. R. Tolkien | Tolkien: I can't believe I failed Epic Fantasy 101.
/ girl: But JRR Tolkien, didn't you write the Chronicles of Narnia or some crap? / Tolkien: Um... I wrote the Lord of the Rings.
/ girl: Right, I think I saw that movie. That was the one with, like, dragons and knights and melodrama, right? / Tolkien:... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/06/tolkien.html |
| Back to School - da Vinci | Leonardo da Vinci: I can't believe I failed Renaissance Art.
/ girl: Leonardo da Vinci! / girl: I thought having a Ninja Turtle named after you meant you could do anything.
/ Leonardo da Vinci: God, I miss those kinds of shows. / Leonardo da Vinci: When we were kids we didn't question that kind of thing.... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/09/da-vinci.html |
| Back to School - Spiderman | Spiderman: I can't believe I failed Superheroism 101.
/ boy: Oh my god, it's Tobey Maguire! / [[Spider-sense lines appear around Spiderman's head.]]
/ Spiderman: My spider-sense is telling me you're a complete idiot.
/ boy: I thought you were getting attacked by space-worms. / Spiderman: No, that happened... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/09/spiderman.html |
| Back to School - Ayauhteotl | Ayauhteotl: I can't believe I failed Mesoamerican Mythology.
/ boy: Hmm... Who are you? / Ayauhteotl: Surely you recognize Ayauhteotl, Aztec goddess of vanity, fame, and crepuscular fog!
/ boy: How ironic that you would be completely not famous. / Ayauhteotl: But... But don't the children still chant... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/10/ayauhteotl.html |
| Back to School - Leonardo DiCaprio | leo: I can't believe I failed Acting 101.
/ girl: Swoon! It's Leonardo Di Caprio! / leo: Hello, yes, thank you, no autographs.
/ girl: Would you like a bite of my Cinnabon, Leo? / leo: Cinnabarn? Like, horse-flavoured cinnamon buns?
/ girl: AH HA HA HA HA HA HA you are SO funny ha ha let's-have-hot-makeouts-right-here-and-now / leo:... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/10/dicaprio.html |
| Back to School - Michael Jordan | Michael Jordan: I can't believe I failed Intro to Basketball.
/ girl: Oh my, it's baseball legend Michael Jordan! / Jordan: I'm actually more well known for basketball.
/ girl: Oh yeah... I still remember my grandfather walking me over to Soldier Field every Sunday night to watch you hammer 'em into the... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/10/jordan.html |
| Back to School - Charles de Gaulle | Charles de Gaulle: I can't believe I failed Midcentury French Politics.
/ boy: Charles de Gaulle! What are you doing here? / de Gaulle: I was looking for a little anonymity, so I thought I would come to the New World for a time.
/ boy: Good idea. Over here, most people only know you as an airport. / de... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/11/de-gaulle.html |
| Back to School - Guy Fawkes | Guy Fawkes: I can't believe I failed Parliamentary Detonation 101.
/ boy: That makes you 0 for 2, Guy Fawkes. / Guy: At least I still have a day named after me, and a successful graphic novel series related indirectly to me, and a pretty sweet name. Guy Fox! I'm the guy... who is foxy. / boy: Your special... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/11/fawkes.html |
| Back to School - Vladimir Nabokov | Vladimir Nabokov: I can't believe I failed Lepidoptery.
/ girl: Is that just a fancy name for liking young girls, Vladimir Nabokov? / Nabokov: Niet, it means the study of winged insects such as moths and butterflies. As for Lolita, it was fiction!
/ girl: So your interests are young girls and... butterflies? / Nabokov:... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/11/nabokov.html |
| Back to School - Richard III | Richard III: I can't believe I failed English History, 1483 - 1485.
/ girl: Ugh, get away from me, King Richard III! / Richard: Does my rudely stamp'd visage terrify you? Does my deformed, unfinish'd frame make you back away in horror? / girl: No, it has more to do with your tendency of locking people... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/11/richard.html |
| Back to School - Bruce Lee | Bruce Lee: I can’t believe I failed Martial Arts.
/ girl: As a pacifist, I applaud your failure, Bruce Lee. / Lee: I’m a pacifist too! The true martial artist uses his skills for peace, not violence.
/ girl: So you get really good at hurting people to promote not hurting people? / Lee: That, and plus... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/12/lee.html |
| Back to School - Hunter S Thompson | Narrator: The first panel always came easy.
/ Hunter S Thompson: I can't believe I failed Gonzo Journalism 101.
/ boy: Your pupils are the size of dinner plates, Hunter S Thompson. / Narrator: That night, by panel 2, my eyes had begun to swim around my head. Where was this going? I grabbed more pills.
/ Thompson:... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/12/thompson.html |
| Back to School - Thom Yorke | Thom Yorke: I can't believe I failed Electronic Music 101.
/ boy: Not all of Radiohead's music has been electronic, Thom Yorke. / Thom: No, but that's where my head's been at these days.
/ boy: Maybe you were distracted by the alienation you feel in this futuristic dystopia called the Modern World. / Thom:... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/12/yorke.html |
| Back to School - Gottfried Leibniz | Leibniz: I can't believe I failed Knowing Everything 101.
/ girl: Hey, weren't you in that band Whitesnake? / Leibniz: Madame, I am the great Gottfried Leibniz. I have made important contributions to almost every field of knowledge!
/ girl: Oh my god! I think the dead animal on your head just moved. / Leibniz:... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2008/02/leibniz.html |
| Back to School - Sappho | Sappho: I can't believe I failed Seventh Century BC Greek Poetry.
/ boy: Hey Sappho. What's up? / Sappho: I'm just bummed about this mark. I really thought this course would be up my alley.
/ boy: Not enough lesbos for you? / Sappho: Uh, the island of my birth is pronounced 'lezz-boss'. And if anything,... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2008/02/sappho.html |
| Back to School - Vishnu | Vishnu: I can't believe I failed Sustainable Universes.
/ girl: Oh my god, it's Vishnu!
/ Vishnu: Hey, what's happening. / girl: So you're into environmentalism these days?
/ Vishnu: Not exactly... Maintaining all of existence is sort of, you know, my job. But the course was mostly about recycling. / Vishnu:... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2008/02/vishnu.html |
| Back to School - Neil Armstrong | Neil Armstrong: I can't believe I failed History of Space Exploration.
/ boy: Neil Armstrong! Are – are you in space right now? / Armstrong: Zero-gravity is where I feel most at home.
/ boy: Doesn't that mess with your blood flow? I heard it does weird things to you. / Armstrong: Yeah, it results in... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2008/03/armstrong.html |
| Back to School - St Drogo | Saint Drogo: I can't believe I failed Bilocation 101.
/ boy: I'm not sure I buy that whole story, Saint Drogo. / Drogo: No, it's true! I totally know how to exist in two places at the same time.
/ boy: And now you're the patron saint of coffee, and... / Drogo: Broken bones, gall stones, hernias, orphans,... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2008/03/drogo.html |
| Back to School - Abraham Lincoln again | Abraham Lincoln: I can't believe I failed American History 101 again.
/ girl: Abe what the heck. / Lincoln: I even got the Gettysburg Address question wrong.
/ girl: “Four score and seven years ago”? / Lincoln: Yeah, but people misinterpreted that. I wasn't talking about eighty-seven years ago, I meant... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2008/03/lincoln-again.html |
| Back to School - Eleanor Roosevelt | Eleanor Roosevelt: I can't believe I failed Introduction to Human Rights.
/ boy: You should've aced that one, Eleanor Roosevelt. / Roosevelt: I've repressed a lot of those memories. Do you realize we actually felt it necessary to write that people had a right to be recognized as people? We had to write... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2008/03/roosevelt.html |
| Back to School - Joseph Stalin | Stalin: I can't believe I failed Stalinism.
/ girl: You took a course about yourself, Stalin? / Stalin: YOU DARE ADDRESS THE GREAT AND POWERFUL STALIN DIRECTLY?
/ girl: Oh god, here we go again. / Stalin: BOW BEFORE THE WRATH OF MY UNBELIEVABLE SUPER POWERS
/ girl: We already discussed this. You do not... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2008/03/stalin.html |
| Back to School - Stephen Hawking | Stephen Hawking: I can't believe I failed Black Holes 101.
/ boy: Didn't you discover those things, Stephen Hawking? / Hawking: Not exactly, but I am famous for combining Quantum Theory and General Relativity to come to important conclusions about them.
/ boy: Oh yeah, I do that sometimes too. / boy:... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2008/04/hawking.html |
| Back to School - Mary, Queen of Scots | Mary, Queen of Scots: I can't believe I failed Getting Beheaded 101.
/ boy: Well, it did take two or three chops, ghost Mary Queen of Scots. / Mary: Maybe my execution went wrong because I was distracted by your handsome face, stranger.
/ boy: That has to be the single worst pickup line ever uttered. / Mary:... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2008/04/mary.html |
| Back to School - Oda Nobunaga | Oda Nobunaga: I can't believe I failed Japanese History.
/ girl: A lot has happened since your time, Oda Nobunaga. / Nobunaga: Yes, and my dream of bringing all of Japan under one sword has never come true.
/ girl: Uh... Actually, Japan is unified now. / Nobunaga: Bah! I was never talking about unifying... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2008/04/nobunaga.html |
| Back to School - Plato | Plato: I can't believe I failed Introduction to Plato.
/ boy: Why would you have to be introduced to yourself, Plato? / Plato: After two-and-a-half millenia, I forgot what I used to think about universals. I was all like, "Wait, are they timeless ideas which can be conceived of repeatedly but which people... http://btscomic.blogspot.com/2007/10/plato_22.html |