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Well... Zelda IS made in Japan 1: dude! check out this rad triforce tattoo i got! / 2: that's the mitsubishi logo.
No More Smudges! Lefties should be allowed to write their text from right to left to prevent smudging / and everyone should carry around mirrors in order to read it easily. / *Written mirrored* / That makes sense, right?
Great Interview Tips tip #15: Tout your strengths on your resume / Employer: it says here you can check away-messages at over 120 a.m.p.m. you're hired.
More Great Interview Tips tip #14: make good eye contact / *man standing really close to recruiter* / Recruiter: Your eyeball is physically touching my eyeball... ...you're hired
Not Good Enough Friend 1: Did you shower today? / Friend 2: Yea. / Friend 1: I don't believe you / Friend 1: At all.
 
A Question, an Answer, and a Question Question: why, while waiting for a green light so you can turn left, would you inch forward? / Answer: to block my view when i'm trying to turn right on red. / *two cars shown where the person trying to take the right is angry because they can't see* / What is your freaking problem?!
Prunix *Box for a product called Prunix* / Prunix - the once daily suppository to cure pruneyness! / cures pruneyness resulting from: / long baths/showers / swimming / dishwashing / and more! / WARNING! Might kill you. Will not sure pruneyness resulting from old age
Parking Garage Zen One time, I saw this amazing spider web. / *a spider web is shown* / it was in the parking garage at work. / the spider had spent all day on it. / this drawing doesn't do it justice at all. / it had one... / ...long... / ...key... / ...anchor thread... / ...attached to the roof of my car. / I apologized...
I'd Like to Know Do you feel rested when you wake up from a coma?
My Very First Left-Handed Toon 1: bad news! we're out of shampoo! / 1: but good news: we're also out of conditioner. / 2: so?! / 1: well, i feel more comfortable when they run out at the same time / *person 1 looks away while person 2 stands there*
 
It's the Truth Friend 1: Mine's bigger than yours. / *Friend 1 shows friend 2 gigantic hand* / Friend 2: You should probably get that looked at.
Mikva's crush Raines: whoa! what happened to you? / *Mikva is shown with eyes in the shape of hearts* / Mikva: i met this amazing, beautiful girl on the train and i fell in love. / Raines: so your eyes took on a literal heart shape? / Mikva: it's very painful! / Raines: love hurts! / Mikva: yes it does. / Raines:...
Slight Confusion Friend 1: This sudoku is really hard! / Friend 2: That's a crossword puzzle. / Friend 1: Hmmm... / Friend 1: Ohhh!
Dance! 1: Sweet dance move! What's it called? / 2: I'm actually having a controlled seizure. / *Man 1 starts dancing like Man 2's seizure dance* / 2: Stop dancing and please help me!
More Great Interview Tips tip #16: Cry. This shows your are sensitive. Companies want sensitive. / *person being interviewed is crying to the recuiter* / Interviewee: you keep asking me hard questions! i don't know the answers!! / Interviewer: susan! bring me some kleenex and a copy of our benefits package! this man is your boss...
 
Hmmm 1: Something seems to be wrong with my pants. / 2: You're not wearing any / 1: That would do it.
Hey wanna join the pen15 club? i have a friend who's from London. One time, he and i were comparing some childhood traditions. / 1: so, one kid would ask another kid, "have you told your parents you're gay yet?" and no matter how they answered, they were admitting they were gay! / 2: haha! we'd say, "hey! you dropped your gay card!"...
Addiction Coffee: at least it's not alcohol.
Siamese (If You Please) 1: hey i got a siamese cat! / 2: oh! can i see? / *person one turns around and there is a cat growing out of their back* / cat: Mew.
Irked Worms!!!! Worm 1: i find myself perturbed by the occurrence of television advertisements before the feature film at my local cinema. / Worm 2: verily, i presume my empathy on the matter will do little to ease your perturbation, you perfect ass / *Banner shows the phrase "irked worms"*
 
Pi The maximum number of digits anyone should know of pi should be no greater than the number of digits displayed on their calculator. / If they know more than that, then they clearly put extra effort into it.
Of Love And Apples "Of Love And Apples" / by drewmo / The girls, they would play it, at every lunch break. / They'd giggle and laugh and make noises kids make. / Pull the stem off the apple, just by twisting it. / With each twist say a letter from the alphabet. / And the letter that popped it, that was the key! / Twas the...
A Stranger with Candy *Man pulls up to children in a van labeled "Candy Guy"* / Man in van: Hey kids! Want some candy? / Children: No!!! / Man in van: This was a bad business to sink all my money into
Nostalgia I recently drove by the house I grew up in for the first time since we moved, about two years ago. it was a weird experience. / *Man shown looking out the window of his car as he drives* / I found it funny how affected I was by small changes made by the new owners. / *Woman shown on the phone looking...
The Sounds of Hearing Loss The ringing in my ears sounds like a song! / *hum hum* / oh sugar sugar
 
INITIATE EXPERIMENT *Mikva and Raines standing* / Voice from above: Hello! We're your new space overlords! We're conducting tests!! / Voice from above: You two will be switching bodies NOW!! / *Mikva and Raines look startled* / Mikva: I feel the same. / Raines: NO PANTS?!?
Pressurized *A pilot is flying a plane* / Passenger: Oh no! My ears won't pop! / Passenger: Pilot! Please don't land! / Pilot: It's too late. / *Passenger's head pops*
It's monkeys Monkey 1: Happy Halloween! / Monkey 2: Not yet! / Monkey 1: Hey, do you know why Canadians spell it with an apostrophe? Like "Hallowe'en"? / Monkey 2: No! No one knows that. Not even Canadians. / Canadian Monkey: Excuse me, I'm Canadian. I know why. / Monkey 1 and 2: AAHHH!! / *Monkey 1 jumps into monkey...
Clubbin' Girl 1: I'm gonna go to the club tonight and grind on some guys and have them hit on me and spill drinks on me. / Girl 2: Awesome!
A Simple Exam Question Can you spot the Floridian? / *Line up shown of many different people* / Random person in line up: OMIGOD! I think I saw a snowflake!! Is everyone okay???
 

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