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|Nukees - Friday, December 10, 2004||Cindy Lee: You think my sister's just torturing me? / Gav: Isn't that her job? / [[Cindy Lee is turning to leave]] / Cindy Lee: Well, foo on her then! I'm going to find this girl from King Luca's little book and the detective hunting him down. Thank you, Mr. Gav. / Gav: Sisters untie! / [[Cindy Lee has left. Gav takes a gulp of his drink. Jeannie is pouring a drink.]] / Jeannie: Didn't know about the detective, did you? / Gav: Did I miss a meeting?|
|Nukees - Friday, December 17, 2004||Gav: So, if he gets sprayed by a hose or a water balloon or something, he gets bigger, because he's a sponge. / Woman: But he lives underwater? / Gav: Exactly! / Gav: So since we're getting along so well, how about heading back to your place for a drink and some physiology experiments? / Woman: Ugh! / Jeannie: [[in the background]] Last call! / Woman: Why do men have to be like that? We just had a pleasant conversation. Isn't that enough? Why does it always have to lead to sex? / Gav: How else do we know if we won?|
|Nukees - Monday, December 20, 2004||Jeannie: Have you ever thought about buying one a drink first? / Gav: That would use resources needed for buying ME drinks. / Jeannie: Well then, how about a date? / Gav: I'd love to! / Jeannie: *giggle* Silly! Of course I meant YOU asking one of THEM. You know, girls don't go home with a guy just because he asks. / Gav: I can point to three doing just that right now. / Jeannie: Well sure, if you're looking for a slut... / Gav: I AM!|
|Nukees - Wednesday, December 22, 2004||Jeannie: Hm, I guess I should've pegged you for a pig, Gav. / Gav: Well, yes, but it's not that... It's just... / Jeannie: What? / Gav: I just realized I can't really tell you... / Jeannie: Why not? / Gav: Let's just say that my long-term relationship needs are... uh... / Gav: ...reserved. / Jeannie: That'd be the only thing about you that's reserved. / Gav: Kicking while vulnerable! Foul! Penalty! Gav gets two minutes uncontested behind the bar!!|
|Nukees - Monday, December 27, 2004||[[Outside of Flake's]] / Gav: 'night, Jeannie! / Jeannie: [[off-camera]] msrfkl. / Rita: Hey mumbling ponytail boy... Got a light? / Gav: I have a laser pointer. / Rita: So... NO. / Rita: Then you are of little to no use to me. / Gav: LITTLE to no...? / Rita: I suppose you might spontaneously combust... / Gav: Out here, I'm more often struck by lightning. / Rita: Okay, do that.|
|Nukees - Wednesday, December 29, 2004||Rita: You seem dismal. / Gav: I was led astray by promises of an after hours party. / Rita: I LIKE dismal. Why don't we make our OWN after hours? / Gav: Serious? Where do you live? / Rita: I was thinking YOUR place. / Gav: Don't think so. I live in a... hm... Well, why not? You look prepared for the unexpected. / Rita: Cool. CHRIS! I FOUND US A PLACE! / Gav: That's TOO prepared.|
|Nukees - Friday, December 31, 2004||Gav: Now WAIT a min-- Who's this "Chris?" / Rita: Don't worry. She's cool. / Gav: [[seeing Chris]] And with THAT, I stopped worrying. / Christine: Hey Rita, the rest of the gang is on the way. / Gav: REST? Whoa, what did I sign onto here? / Rita: It's just my... Uh... Choir group. Shall we? / Gav: I KNOW I'm being set up for something, but I just can't back out until I learn WHAT.|
|Nukees - Monday, January 3, 2005||Gav: So... What? You girls think you're witches, don't you? I'm going to be tied down to a pentagram and ritually bloodletted? / Gav: Or no... You're some kind of vampire larpers, out to... / Rita: What's a "larper?" / Gav: Holy crap, there are MORE of you! / Gav: What? Sorry, I just remembered I'm not familiar with that term. Point being, how much blood will I be losing tonight? / Rita: Oh, no more than a couple pints... / Gav: I can live without that.|
|Nukees - Wednesday, January 5, 2005||Rita: I'm kidding, of course, we don't want your blood... / Gav: No, really, I don't mind. / Rita: We want your SOUL! / Girls: Giggle / Gav: Well, we're here. / Rita: This is a campus building. / Gav: The ventilation sucks, but it's got a great view... / Rita: It's a good thing we're not zombies. / Gav: Lots of closet space... Great neighborhood, too! Close to schools.|
|Nukees - Friday, January 7, 2005||Rita: You live in a school building? / Gav: Ah, could be worse, I could live in South Dakota. / Rita: Where do you sleep? / Gav: In my office, of course. Got it wired for cable and everything. / Rita: Really? / Gav: Of course not. I had to get satellite. Oh, but we probably shouldn't wake Danny. / Rita: You have a ROOMMATE?! / Gav: Duh, how else could I afford the rent on a place this size?|
|Nukees - Monday, January 10, 2005||Gav: C'mon, my office is this way. / Rita: But what about your roommate? / Gav: Yeah... I thought about it. We're waking him up. / Rita: Oh? Is he FUN? / Gav: No, I need a witness. / Danny: GAV! Do you realize a supreme being would exist at a temperature of absolute zero? / Rita: He's awake! / Gav: Danny! CHICKS! Stop geeking up the place!|
|Nukees - Wednesday, January 12, 2005||Gav: Danny! Ixnay on the isicsphay! / Rita: No, don't suppress your friend's curiosity! What have you discovered, Daniel? / Danny: Well it is quite simple, really. Starting from the axiom that supreme beings are omnipresent, via the uncertainty principle, his or her momentum, and thus temperature, approaches zero. / Christine: But only in an infinite universe, assuming the Lord has mass. / Danny: True. / Gav: Oh my god, please tell me you're not here to talk about PHYSICS? / Rita: Oh no. / Rita: We're here to talk about the Lord Jesus Christ! / Gav: [[recoiling like a vampire seeing a cross]] AH!|
|Nukees - Friday, January 14, 2005||Jezebel: Hey heathen, where's the booze? / Gav: Uh, in the fridge behind the antidote. / Rita: So let me explain Jesus' love and why you need to be saved. / Julia: [[handing Rita the bible]] The book. / Gav: Sounds like a HOOT. But just a sec. Is it just me or do you girls NOT seem... "Devout"? I mean, look at all this cleavage. / Danny: [[apparently complying with Gav's suggestion]] Okay. / Jezebel: Jesus loves cleavage. / Gav: Well AMEN to THAT.|
|Nukees - Monday, January 17, 2005||Gav: How can you be Christians? You all dress like witches. / Jezebel: So do nuns. / [[Jezebel lights a cigarette]] / Gav: But you're drinking... Smoking! / Jezebel: Jesus turned water to wine. THAT's a boy who knows how to PARTY! / Jezebel: And I challenge you to find "Thou shalt not suck on a cancerstick" in the Book. / Gav: What about "Thy body is a temple?" / Jezebel: [[blowing smoke in Gav's face]] INCENSE, then. / Gav: I kinda like YOU.|
|Nukees - Wednesday, January 19, 2005||Rita: So tell me, Gav, are you often confused by moral decisions? / Gav: Of others, yes. Whare's Danny? / Rita: He departed with Juila [sic] and Christine. / Gav: Oh no you don't. Divide and convert, eh? Danny's mind and ethics are MINE to manipulate! / Rita: We're going to need thirty pieces of silver. / Jezebel: I'm on it.|
|Nukees - Friday, January 21, 2005||Jezebel: I'm not running after him in these heels. / Rita: I'll call Julia and find out where they are. We'll get there before him. / Sign reads: Stairs ----> / Rita: Funny, I've got five bars, but wherever Julia's gone, she's got no signal. They shouldn't have left the building. / Rita: I'd say there's either some wacky science experiment interfering, or they're in the basement. / Jezebel: Can't it be both? Maybe they've got a nuclear reactor in the basement. / Rita: Don't be a smart ass, Jez.|
|Nukees - Monday, January 24, 2005||Danny: Now the postulate of a supreme being involves many variables. We must hypothesize separately the existence of either an "active" or a "passive" god. / Danny: We can subdivide the definition of "active" into "able or not able to circumvent his or her own laws," and yet further consider beings responsible, respectively, for all, some, or none of the laws of physics. / [[Christine raises her hand]] / Danny: Yes? / Christine: What are you writing on the white board? / Danny: I am unsure. It is what I am used to doing.|
|Nukees - Wednesday, January 26, 2005||Danny: Now, testing an "active" god of the first kind is nigh trivial. We simply look for local violations of the laws of physics. / [[Julia raises her hand]] / Danny: Another question? / Julia: Christianity is based on FAITH. You cannot TEST the Lord's existence. We BELIEVE because we KNOW it to be true in our hearts. / [[Danny turns back to the white board, ignoring the remark.]] / Danny: Now, an "active" god of the second kind may be demonstrated by local closed system decreases in entropy.|
|Nukees - Friday, January 28, 2005||Jezebel: Heathen's greetings. / Gav: YOU! / Gav: Look, you may be mind-numbingly HOT, but you... Uh... Won't... / Jezebel: What? / Gav: Completely forgot what I was saying! / Jezebel: Try closing your eyes. / Gav: [[with his eyes closed]] And now you're naked!!|
|Nukees - Monday, January 31, 2005||Gav: Look, just step aside so I can save my friend before you girls do. / Jezebel: You don't HAVE to feel this way, you know... / Gav: Don't start! Your Jesus voodoo won't wash on me! / Jezebel: I'm just sayin'... Do you LIKE feeling angry all the time? Wouldn't you rather feel LOVE all the time? / Gav: ALL the time? I dunno. How about 15 minutes in the supply closet? / Jezebel: Classy! Feel your own love man-harlot.|
|Nukees - Wednesday, February 2, 2005||Jezebel: Now, you want to know what I find sexy? / Gav: I'm guessing stigmata. But keep it to yourself. I am immune to your persuasion. / Gav: Despite your . . . uh . . . overabundance, you must be chaste. Sans sex, you're nothing to me. / Gav: That curse you call "love" is an evolutionary throwback, doomed only to pain in modern society, like the appendix or armpit hair! / Jezebel: [[holding her left breast]] Yeah . . . something like THAT! / Rita: Jezebel!|
|Nukees - Friday, February 4, 2005||Jezebel: He's been hurt in the past. BADLY. / Rita: Forget him. We just have to keep him from the other. / Jezebel: Rita, HE'S the one whoe NEEDS J.C! The other one seems quite happy with his unusual beliefs. / Rita: Yeah. TOO happy... / Jezebel: I only wonder which of you two was hurt worse?|
|Nukees - Monday, February 7, 2005||Jezebel: [[upon entering the lab]] Wow. What IS all this stuff? / Rita: Dear Lord! This room is GINORMOUS! / Jezebel: Rita, did you just use the Lord's name in vain? / Rita: Not vain! I was praying to him for, uh, enlightenment. / Jezebel: Well, what do you suppose is under this sheet? / Rita: JESUS! / Rita: ...Protect and guide us, amen! / Rita: There... No vain! / Jezebel: Well, you know... No praying, no vain.|
|Nukees - Wednesday, February 9, 2005||Gav: DANNY! <
|Nukees - Friday, February 11, 2005||Christine: Your friend has some good ideas...
/ Gav: HA! Don't try stoking his creative spark only to snuff it in your baptismal pool! / Christine: Have you been working on that metaphor all the way down?
/ [[a skreeching sound getting louder, closer]] <
|Nukees - Monday, February 14, 2005||Rita: Oh God! Oh God! Oh God! All I did was press one little button! / Jezebel: For Christ's sake, stop vaining the Lord's name and come help, Rita! / Julia: Truely no human could construct such a marvel! / Christine: Lord, protect us from your robot bug of righteousness! / Danny: Did not anyone notice the precision of the Mark Two? How very splendid! / Gav: [[being slowly crushed against the wall]] Must... Take... Danny... With me...|
|Nukees - Wednesday, February 16, 2005||[[Overhead shot of the crashed giant robot ant, Gav's body lying on the wreckage]] / Gav: [[in text box]]: It happened just like before: the crippling sadness... the darkness, the rapturous light... / Gav: [[in text box]]: ...Narrarating [sic] it all to myself in the past tense... / [[Gav walking in white tunnel, floating billboard saying "No services"]] / Gav: [[in text box]]: But this time was different...familiar... / [[Gav running through tunnel with gleaming eyes]] / Gav: [[in text box]]: ...Like coming home... / [[Gav sticking his head through the floor of the tunnel]] / Gav: [[in text box]] ...But getting lost on the way. / Gav: Cute little Egyptian girl...? Hello?|
|Nukees - Friday, February 18, 2005||[[This portion of the tunnel passes through an Italianesque villa. Bacchus naps in a doorway. Gav speaks from inside the tunnel.]]
/ Gav: Excuse me! Sir?
/ Bacchus: <
|Nukees - Monday, February 21, 2005||Gav: Now, she lives in a studio above an ill-tempered mass of tentacles. / Bacchus: That doesn't really narrow it down. / Bacchus: You smell like a mortal! / Gav: Yeah, well, YOU smell like a grape crusher's foot! / Bacchus: [[angrily]] You DARE to insult BACCHUS, GOD of PARTYING?! / Gav: God of partying? / Bacchus: I'm trying to get more support among the college crowd. It isn't working, is it?|
|Nukees - Wednesday, February 23, 2005||Gav: Look, I totally support your cause, man, believe me, but I really need to find... / Bacchus: SURE, a few vinters toast me now and then, but it's not like the OLD party days... / Gav: A common lament amongst frat boys... / Bacchus: That is IT! Maenads, ATTACK! / Bacchus: Hmf, in the OLD days, drunk naked women would be clawing your body to shreds by now. / Gav: Sure, that's what you all promise, but once you've paid ten bucks to get in, it's all Pabst kegs and puked-on burlap upholstery!|
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