( searching 3065 episodes of Dinosaur Comics!)

• technically everything DOES blast away from the sun. thanks inverse-square law! you made writing technically-specific language easy!

  T-Rex: If gravity reversed right now I would be so pooched! Please RT if gravity reversed right now and you would be so pooched! {{no text on panel 2}} Dromiceiomimus: ...You're not on Twitter right now, T-Rex. On that subject: I followed you on Twitter for about 10 minutes, but everything you posted was... insane? T-Rex: Dromiceiomimus, I will be honest: I'm not ONE HUNDRED percent certain what Twitter does, but does this mean that you will not be please RTing? Utharaptor: If gravity reverses, then matter repels instead of attracting! T-Rex: And...? Utharaptor: And we're ALL pooched! Utharaptor: It's not just "we flaot off into the sky". The earth's core becomes a bomb, everything blasts away from the sun, and the universe eventuallyends up being a fine mist of particles each trying to get as far away as possible from all the other particles. Good one, T-Rex. Narrator: MEANWHILEM IN THE UNIVERSE WHERE GRAVITY REVERSED RIGHT... NOW: [[T-Rex flies in the air]] T-Rex: Holy crap!! T-Rex: This first part is AMAZING!!
  
  

  http://qwantz.com/index.php?comic=2035

• totally totally pooched

  T-Rex: So how do people do it? How do people choose a direction in their life, I mean! T-Rex: It seems pretty hard! Dromiceiomimus: Well, T-Rex, I think most people choose a direction they want to go in, a job they'd like to do, and then work toward it. T-Rex: Yeah, but what if you finally get that job, and it's not all you hoped? What if it sort of sucks? Utahraptor: What are you talking about? You don't have a job in the first place! T-Rex: Yeah, but man! T-Rex: Being unemployed was sort of the dream, but now I realize that it just leaves me with a lot of free time, and I feel useless and unaccomplished at the end of the day! Utahraptor: So get a job! Problem solved! T-Rex: But being unemployed isn't sucky all the time, just some of the time! I don't know! I'm pooched, man! I'm pooched! T-Rex: Being pooched is akin to being screwed! T-Rex: Now you know!
  
  

  http://qwantz.com/index.php?comic=586

• dinosaur presents day is often referred to as 'christmas' as a handy shorthand

  T-Rex: Oh man, I haven't bought anyone any presents yet! I AM SO POOCHED! I am the worst friend in the world. T-Rex: This will consummate my social ruin FOR SURE! Narrator: SOON: T-Rex: Oh, hey, Dromiceiomimus! How's - how are things? Dromiceiomimus: Things are alright, T-Rex! T-Rex: Haha, that's cool! Well, I guess I'll see you tomorrow: Christmas Eve! I have a very special present for you, my friend. Dromiceiomimus: Hah hah, sure thing! Thanks! T-Rex: Why did I say that?? I AM EVEN MORE POOCHED THAN EVER BEFORE. Utahraptor: No presents, T-Rex? T-Rex: Nope! And then I compounded it by telling Dromiceiomimus that I had something extra special for her. And OH MAN, now you know my secret. I'm out of control! Utahraptor: It's okay! We'll be your friends even without presents. T-Rex: I know I know but still! Narrator: LATER: A CHRISTMAS MIRACLE?? T-Rex: Hey!! T-Rex: I could give Dromiceiomimus my toaster!
  
  

  http://qwantz.com/index.php?comic=686

• democracy comics

  T-Rex: It occurs to me that democracy is pretty unfair if you're not a dude who's in the majority! Narrator: DEMOCRACY COMICS T-Rex: It sucks, because if everyone disagrees with you, then you'll never get anything you want. It's majority rule! MOB rule! Dromiceiomimus: Well, majority rule is sort of the definition of democracy, T-Rex. Not everyone can get everything they want! T-Rex: Yeah, but what if the majority decide to be totally racist against you? You're pooched! Utahraptor: People have worried about this before, my friend! T-Rex: What do they say? Utahraptor: Well, what you're worried about is called the "tyranny of the majority", and it's usually countered by the observation that there's at least a push for minority rights being respected in a democracy, since we're all minorities in one way or another. T-Rex: Right! Like how I'm in a minority because I sometimese like to sleep in on weekends. Utahraptor: Actually, I'd say most people like to do that, T-Rex. T-Rex: Really? Are you serious?? T-Rex: Have all my years of sleepy shame been for naught?
  
  

  http://qwantz.com/index.php?comic=703

• that's what we get for living next to a SUN-SIZED THERMONUCLEAR REACTOR THAT IS ACTUALLY A SUN.

  T-Rex: Alright everyone! We've had a good run, but it's time to face facts: T-Rex: This planet isn't going to be around forever! T-Rex: The sun will become a red giant in 7.655 billion years! And at that point, WE ARE POOCHED. We are all TOTALLY DEAD AND BURNT INTO A CRISP. It's game over for team "let's exist and be alive on Earth"! T-Rex: Who could've ever predicted that this would be what we'd get for living next to a SUN-SIZED THERMONUCLEAR REACTOR?? Utahraptor: Seems like we've got some time though! T-Rex: Sure! T-Rex: But we've also got a DEADLINE. And even if we somehow escape this doomed planet Earth, the universe itself will eventually cool so much that life won't be possible. Look, all I'm saying is that if you've been putting something off, maybe today's the day? We're gonna run out of tomorrows eventually. Narrator: THUS CONCLUDES THE STORY OF HOW T-REX ENDED UP CLEANING HIS TOILET ON A FRIDAY NIGHT T-Rex: Logic! T-Rex: It hurts me sometimes! {{Title Text: let it be known that i hereby face eternity with toilets i am not ashamed to have guests use}}
  
  

  http://qwantz.com/index.php?comic=2328

• Good, nobody's around. Now I can stop self-narrating and do something REALLY embarrassing!

  Narrator: EARLIER: T-Rex: Good, nobody's around. Now I can do something REALLY embarrassing! [[Black bar over T-Rex's eyes]] Narrator: LATER: T-Rex: It occurs to me: every time I do something private, I'm REALLY just betting that technology to look into the arbitrary past won't ever be developed. Because if it is ever invented, game over, man, game over! People will be able to look at any moment in history! T-Rex: Folks will know all of my embarrassing little SECRETS. Utahraptor: Actually, T-Rex, there's been a few stories written on that theme: Asimov and Clarke both wrote one! Utahraptor: The technology means the end of all privacy, but also the end of most violent crime... T-Rex: Okay YEAH I read them! All I'm saying is it just takes this tech to be developed ONCE, at any point in the future, and my privacy is pooched. Friggin' dudes watching me poop 20,000 years in the future. Narrator: TWENTY-THOUSAND YEARS IN THE FUTURE: Future Dude 1: I don't know why he thought we'd want to watch him poop. Future Dude 2: Yeah, it's weird! Future Dude 3: Let's just do it though
  
  

  http://qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1170

• i've eaten so many friggin' animals!! i've eaten ALL the friggin' animals.

  T-Rex: I have been assuming that our development as a people is linear, moving generally from less to more permissive. It occurs to me: T-Rex: Maybe that isn't always the case! T-Rex: Maybe 100 years from now people will look back on us and say "MAN I can't believe they permitted lifestyles different than my own, current lifestyle. Sheesh!" Dromiceiomimus: Or maybe they'll look back and be aghast at all the animals we kill and eat for food? T-Rex: Aw man, do you really think so? Frig, I'd be TOTALY POOCHED. I've eaten so many friggin' animals! Utahraptor: Most of us have though! T-Rex: Yeah, but I'm totally the worst. T-Rex: Future folks can munch on a carrot, look back on us and say "They were wrong to eat so many tasty animals." FINE. But then when they see the caliber, frequency and verve of MY animal consumption, they'll spit out their carrots in surprise! And teh carrot chunks are 99% guaranteed to spell out the words "HISTORY'S GREATEST VILLAIN"! Utahraptor: Come on! Our culture COULD end up swinging towards rampant fleshotarianism instead. T-Rex: That's true. Man! T-Rex: The future having different opinions than the present is making it REALLY HARD for me to be popular across all possible timelines.
  
  

  http://qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1398