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Questionable Content: New comics every Monday through Friday
[[Hannelore's apt]]
Winslow: Hannelore! Hannelore! Your birthday present is finished! / Hannelore: My birthday present? / Winslow: We've been working on it all week!
Hannelore: Um...what is it? / Pintsize: Watch! / <<BOOP>>
Birthday present: LOGGIN ON TO STRATEGIC DEFENSE NETWORK...LOGIN 'jack_bauer' OK / ACCESSING ICBM COMMAND/CONTROL...ACCESS OK / INFO...TARGETTING OK / UPLOADING LAUNCH CODES...UPLOAD OK / INITIATING LAUNCH SEQENCE IN 5 SECONDS.. / 4...3...2...
<<SMASH!>>
Hannelore: <b><i>What the hell was that?!</b></i> / Winslow: It was only supposed to play the "Happy Birthday" song and display a holographic cake! / Pintsize: Yeah, I was gonna do that, but then I thought "how many people get to avert global thermonuclear war for their birthday?"
{{Number 1087: It's The Thought That Counts}}
http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=1087
Number 1071: I Cannot Recommend the Peyote Weisback
[[Faye and Hannelore enter a crowded Karaoke bar. Hannelore looks around while the doorman checks Faye's ID]] / Hannelore: Wow, this place is busy. / Faye: Karaoke is a popular pastime among the young and gainlessly employed.
Hannelore: Hey, isn't that Dora's brother over there? / Faye: Hey, you're right. What's he doin' here?
[[Faye and Hannelore go over to where Sven is sitting at a booth with two other young men]] / Faye: Hello smarmosaur, who's this scraggly bunch? / Sven: Just some friends from out of town. What brings you lovely ladies here tonight? / Faye: It's Hanners' birthday. / Sven: Oh really! How many birthday spankings do we owe her?
[[Startled, Hannelore jumps and hides behind Faye]] / Hannelore: Meep! / Faye: Way to go, Sven. You've traumatized her. / Sven: Jeez, good thing I didn't mention birthday punches. / Hannelore: Meeep!
http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=1071
Marten: Steve and Ellen make a cute couple, don't you think? / Dora: Mmm...did Ellen seem a little, uh, young to you? / Marten: No, not really. Why do you ask? / Dora: Oh, it's probably nothing. Nevermind.
Ellen: My birthday's actually coming up next week! I'm so excited ! / Steve: Heheh, man. I didn't even do anything for me twenty-fourth birthday. I just went and got drunk at the bar with Marten.
Ellen: Oh...wow. You're twenty-four? I've, uh, never dated someone that much older than me before... / Steve: Well, I think age differences don't really matter as much after a certain point, you know? I mean, it's not like you're jailbait or...something...
Steve: You're...you're not jailbait, right? / Ellen: Ummmm...Not after next Tuesday?
http://questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=224
Marten: Steve and Ellen make a cute couple, don't you think? / Dora: Mmm...did Ellen seem a little, uh, young to you? / Marten: No, not really. Why do you ask? / Dora: Oh, it's probably nothing. Nevermind.
Ellen: My birthday's actually coming up next week! I'm so excited! / Steve: Heheh, man. I didn't even do anything for my twenty-fourth birthday. I just went and got drunk at the bar with Marten.
Ellen: Oh...wow. You're twenty-four? I've, uh, never dated someone that much older than me before... / Steve: Well, I think age differences don't really matter as much after a certain point, you know? I mean, it's not like you're jailbait or...something...
Steve: You're...you're not jailbait, right? / Ellen: Ummmm...Not after next Tuesday!
http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=224
Number 231: That Darned Conscience
[[Outside Ellen's door]] / Steve: So you're only seventeen years old? How did you-- / Ellen: Oh, I got into college early, if that's what you were about to ask.
Steve: Oh man. Look, Ellen, you're a really nice girl and I like you a lot, but if I had known you were that young I wouldn't have-- / Ellen: You wouldn't have asked me out, even though you're clearly attracted to me?
Steve: Well, I mean it's not that I don't, uh... / [[Holding Steve's hands]] / Ellen: Tell me one thing. If I were eighteen now, if my birthday had been last week instead of next week, would you even care? Would my age even matter to you?
Steve: Well yeah, but it'd be a lot easier to ignore my conscience and kiss you right now. / Ellen: Honest, sweet, intelligent, yet completely crass at the same time. You sure do have a way with the ladies.
http://questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=231
Number 1068: What About Her Clones?
[[Faye has shown up outside Hannelore's apartment. Hannelore opens the door.]] / Faye: Haaaannnnerrrrrrs! I'm bored! / Hannelore: I-I'm sorry. Come in!
Hannelore: Would you like some cake? / Faye: I'll never turn down delicious baked goods, but what's the occasion? / Hannelore: It's my birthday!
Faye: WHAT?! Why didn't you tell anyone? / Hannelore: Well, I don't like making a big deal of it, and parties are messy...
[[Faye and Hannelore sitting on Hannelore's couch with plates of cake]] / Faye: So how old are you now? / Hannelore: Do you mean my physical age, or should I include the years I spent in bio-stasis?
[[Faye looks silently at Hannelore for a panel. Hannelore focuses on her cake.]]
Faye: Are you fucking with me? / Hannelore: Yes. I'm sorry.
http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=1068
Questionable Content: New comics every Monday through Friday
Number 231: That Darned Conscience
Panel 1 / Steve: So you're only seventeen years old? How did you- / Ellen: Oh, I got into college early, if that's what you were about to ask.
Panel 2 / Steve: Oh man, Look, Ellen, you're a really nice girl and I like you a lot, but if I had known you were that young I wouldn't have- / Ellen: You wouldn't have asked me out, even though you're clearly attracted to me?
Panel 3 / Steve: Well, I mean it's not that I don't, uh... / Ellen: Tell me one thing. If I were eighteen now, if my birthday had been last week instead of next week, would you even care? Would my age even matter to you?
Panel 4 / Steve: Well yeah, but it'd be a lot easier to ignore my conscience and kiss you right now. / Ellen: Honest, sweet, and intelligent, yet completely crass at the same time. You sure do have a way with the ladies.
http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=231
Questionable Content 1093: The Game's Afoot
{{Blackboard: Specials:}} / {{Blackboard: Pour a 40 for Gygax}}
Hannelore: Hi Dora, can I have a large coffee? / Dora: Sure thing, hon. Pull another all-nighter? / Hannelore: No, I just didn't sleep very well on Sven's couch. It's full of kitty-hair.
Dora: Sven's couch? Why were you sleeping on Sven's couch? / Hannelore: Oh! I, uh, that is, Faye and I, last night, we um...we went to Sven's place, and...it...it was my birthday?
Dora: What? What are you talking about? / Hannelore: NOTHING! NOTHING HAPPENED THAT I CAN'T TELL YOU ABOUT!
Hannelore: OH GOD OH GOD I'VE SAID TOO MUCH I HAVE TO GO I HAVE TO GO HIDE / Dora: O-okay...
Marten: What was that about? / Dora: I'm not sure, but I have a sudden, inexplicable urge to strangle my brother. That seldom bodes well.
http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=1093
[[Inside Coffee of Doom]]
Dora: Hey kids. / Faye: Hi spookybutt. / Marten: Hey Dora.
Raven: Dora! What happened to our plan? You are distinctly not sexied-up right now! / Dora: The thought of spending an entire day in a miniskirt and 4-inch heels got the better of me. Besides, Faye would break my limbs if she caught so much as a whiff of schemin' over Marten.
Faye: You're whispering. Should I be suspicious? If my fly down? Do I have VPL issues? / Dora: No no no, nothing like that. Raven was, uh... / Raven: Asking if I could borrow one of her tampons! That she bought at the drugstore! Which is where she was!
Faye: Okay, now Old Faye would pummel one of you until you confessed to whatever you're scheming. New Faye is just going to tell herself you're planning a surprise birthday party or something and try to forget about it. / Raven: I like New Faye! Being pummeled is no fun. / Dora: She's got fewer calories but just as much body as the original.
http://questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=539#
1094: Maybe Some Twizzlers Too
Marten: I'd better make sure Hanners doesn't hurl herself into traffic or something. / Dora: You do that. I'll wait for Faye to get back. I wanna know what this is about.
Penelope: She was in the bathroom for a long time before she left. I think she's having some sort of gastrointestinal distress. / Dora: I'm with you on the distress part, but something tells me it isn't gastrointestinal.
Faye: I'm ba- oh, h-hey Dora. / Dora: Hannelore came in here babbling incoherently about something to do with last night and Sven and her birthday, and you've been off at some mysterious "doctor's appointment." What's going on, Faye?
Faye: Yeah, uh...I guess I've got something to tell you. / Dora: Tell away. / Penelope: Should I, uh... should I leave?
Faye: Depends, do you want to witness my violent death? / Penelope: Can you wait five minutes? I'll go make some popcorn.
http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=1094
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