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The Turkish Equivalent Of Kansas
Girl: Do you keep hearing loud shrieking noises? / Guy: No.
Girl: Neither do I. / Guy: I wonder if I could drink a building.
Banner flown by a plane piloted by what might be a tiny dinosaur: HAPPY THURSDAY DAY
THURSDAY DAY: / The Thursdayest of all holidays. / [[A graph shows that Thursday Day's Thursdayness is greater than that of Thanksgiving and Moth Awareness Day.]]
Girl: I bet you could drink a building made of water. / Guy: Yeah, but could I drink water made of a building? / [[He imagines a stand selling "FRESH SQUEEZED BUILDING JUICE"]]
Guy (in imagination): If this is fresh-squeezed, where's the pulp? / Guy: What a fraud!
Banner flown by a plane piloted by what might be a tiny dinosaur: NO ONE LIES SO BOLDLY AS THE SNAILBEAR WHO IS INDIGNANT / Snailbear: Rarr!
Girl: Whoa -- your head just got huge. / Guy: It's pregnant with building juice idea babies.
Guy: I can feel them kicking.
Guy: With their idea feet.
http://mountaincomics.com/2010/11/04/the-turkish-equivalent-of-kansas/
[[A Euclidean Pixie whose name might as well be Chad trips Chimneyfoot]]
<<TRIP!>>
Chad: Ha! I guess that's what you'd call a "chimney sweep"! / <<WUMP!>>
Chad: Ooh -- a rhombus!
GEOMETRY IS THE BOMB-ETRY!
Chad: AAAAA! CARNIVOROUS RHOMBUS!! / A diamond is forever hungry.
The Town Meeting: / A summary by a non-buoyant shark
Shark: The townsfolk held a meeting to determine what to do about the lirus epidemic.
Shark: God DAMN I'm hungry.
Shark: Anyway, people started calling for a lirus vaccine. Then the Bureau of Vexillography started calling for a new town flag. That gained steam really fast.
Shark: Please kill me. / Lemon: Nah. You'd probably just be reincarnated as something worse.
Like a mountain shark. / Mountain Shark: This suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucks.
Alt: Vexillographers: They know how to steer a frightened public for personal gain, am I right?
http://mountaincomics.com/2012/11/08/mountain-time-406/
[[A pretzel thumps into the scene]] / <<THUMP>> <<THUMP>> <<THUMP>>
Ms. Pac-Man Fan: Wow, are you the Thumpy Pretzel from Ms. Pac-Man?
Thumpy Pretzel: Yep. / MPM Fan: Can I have your autograph?
Thumpy Pretzel: Ok, but
everything I sign grows insect legs. / [[The piece of paper with Thumpy Pretzel's signature sprouts 6 legs]]
[[Dave has a lightbulb-over-the-head moment]]
Perhaps in the future I will get a taller shower curtain: [[A snake]] / I wish I could eat as seldom as you: [[A crocodile at a water cooler]]
Dave: Hey Thumpy Pretzel, would you paint your name on my lawn? / Thumpy Pretzel: Um... sure?
[[Thumpy Pretzel paints his name on Dave's lawn]] / Dave: HA HA HA HA!
Shortly / [[The planet Earth grows insect legs]]
http://mountaincomics.com/2010/06/17/mountain-time-180/
[[Strongdude and Disgruntled Authority Figure With Gun are discussing if strength can allow you to dodge a bullet]] / Strongdude: I'm so strong I can dodge bullets! / DAFWG: Isn't that more of a speed thing?
Strongdude: I don't know. Let's find out. / DAFWG: Ok.
[[DAFWG shoots Strongdude... he doesn't dodge the bullet]]
[[Strongdude is dying]] / DAFWG: Did you dodge it?
[[Strongdude dies, DAFWG looks up at the words inquisitively]] / Panel: NOW THAT HE HAS DIED, HE CAN TAKE HIS TRUE FORM:
Panel: DECAYING ORGANIC MATTER. / DAFWG: Oh.
[[Surf Rat appears to right the wrongs done by DAFWG, DAFWG tries to shoot him down]] / Surf Rat: Even the circle of life is no match for Surf Rat! / DAFWG: No!!!
[[Meanwhile, Obnoxious Fangirl meets Burkina Faso]] / OF: Oh my God! Are you Burkina Faso? Can I get your autograph? / Burkina Faso: Why stop there?
[[It is heavily implied that OF slept with Burkina Faso]] / {{Later}} / OF: That was incredible. / Burkina Faso: Let me guess: you could feel the Earth move, right?
OF (Thinking): Wow-Burkina Faso gets me! / Burkina Faso (Thinking): Wait'll Benin hears about this!
[[Meanwhile, Snailbear and Robot]] / Robot: Ah, Snailbears. They make the highs higher and the lows more frequent. / Snailbear: Rarr!
[[Meanwhile, a chef is having a barbeque on a snake while Expert Bowler is bowling with Girl-Bowling-Ball]] / Chef: Did they ever determine whether dodging bullets is a speed thing or a strength thing? / Girl-Bowling-Ball: The results were inconclusive.
http://mountaincomics.com/2009/03/02/mountain-time-10/
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