[Chris Adams, explaining the situation]
/ Chris: "You know, girls and zombies have a lot in common..."
[A pack of zombies]
/ Zombies: "BRAINZ!"
[A pack of girls]
/ Girls: "SHOES!"
Comments: No, don't shoot that one! It's a girl, not a zombie!
[[Man points gun at Cat]]
/ Man: I have found happiness!
[[Man shoots Cat]]
/ Man: My happiness is contingent upon fleeing the affections of others.
[[Cat Zombie chases after Man while the gun won't fire]]
/ Man: Do others enjoy pursuing the objects of their affections?
/ Gun: CLICK! CLICK! CLICK! CLICK! CLICK!
[[Both Man and Cat flee from Rat Zombies]]
/ Army of Rat Zombies: YES, WE DO!!!!
/ Thoughts of Man and Cat: Your happiness is freakish!
The Boring Rocks: All right, and next on the agenda at the Boring Rocks town meeting...
The Boring Rocks: We're going to hear from local businessman Mr. WOBBiE!
/ Lava King: Oh no. Not him.
WOBBiE: Thank you sirs! Now as some of you know, The Boring Rocks comic is now on the OhnoRobot webcomic search engine!
WOBBiE: This is not only great for our existing fans, but could help us get new readers! But not without making changes first! Changes like...
Pilot: Better writing?
/ Kocoh: A Campbellian hero's journey?
/ Fwubo: Fewer spelling errors?
/ Superthing: Actual jokes? Or y'know, a Superthing revival comic. Or jokes.
WOBBiE: WRONG! We need BUZZWORDS! Fred, bring 'er out!
WOBBiE: Introducing WOBBiEpro's new Oh-Oh Robot! Turn it on, and it spews keywords! Go!
Oh-Oh Robot: pirate ninja robot cyborg zombie vampire video game super hero super villain hot cool politics parody satire wizard magic Nintendo Microsoft Mac Apple PC DC Sony puzzle space alien rock guitar dinosaur science physics philosophy ghost werewolf theater cow music boy girl man woman fish Star Wars Japan anime manga talking cat explosion action bomb gun sword Marvel funny joke penguin ninja humor ah librarian Warcraft Obama cyborg zombie
Kocoh: I can hear the new readers already, WOBBiE.
/ Fwubo: Yeah, they're screaming about our utter lack of shame.
/ Superthing: Ooh! How about a Campbell-type myth...except about SUPERTHING! We can spell, too!
Jeremy:Hey wanna go see Zombie Land with a friend & I?
/ Allan:Yeah!
Jeremy:You should invite a girl from Yoga.
/ Allan:Uh, K.
And so:
/ Yoga Girl:Well that was a lot of fun, cya at school!
/ Allan:bye
Allan(thinking):She's nice.
A month later:
/ Allan:Ug. I give up.
/ Yoga Girl(text):It takes me more than 2 months to know if I like a guy.
/ {{And so he gave up}}
TWO DAYS EARLIER
Joey: Hey, look at this Zombie book I found
Godfrey: Joey! That is an evil book. I can feel Satan undulating from it?s very unholy core!
Joey: Godfrey, I think it?s just a book
Godfrey: That?s exactly what you said about Harry Party and the Whore of Babylon
/ Joey: That?s not the name
/ Godfrey : I know what I said
Godfrey: I can?t be friends with someone who would buy that book.
Joey: I wonder how much it costs?
Gren: So, why do we think Elwood is any safer than anywhere else in the kingdom?
/ Lucas: My guess is that Lewie would leave them alone for a while to build up his forces.
Lucas: You see, elves don't "undead" well and since controlled leaders aren't as reliable as his zombie troops, he'll wait until he can just swarm Elwood and destroy it effortlessly
Lucas: Of course, the problem I've always had with Elwood was finding it. They use elven techniques and magic to make the whole barony difficult to---
[[Lucas and Gren hit an invisible wall, hard]] <<bonk>> <<smack>>
/ Cadugan: Here it is.
Bromern: ?Every Dungeon Master has heard it before.?
Player: ?I?m going to sneak past the guards.?
/ DM: ?But you?re wearing plate armor??
/ Player: ?Hey! I?m a paladin/ninja/thief. I have 17 ranks in covert! I can sneak in armor!?
Bromern: ?Can you really sneak around in armor? Let?s find out! Alacrity!?
/ Alacrity: ?I?m not coming out.?
/ Bromern: ?Come on Al. You look great.?
Alacrity: ?This is just silly.?
/ Bromern: ?I? um? you look great!?
Bromern: ?To test sneaking in armor, we?ve clad Alacrity in plate armor and set up an obstacle course.?
Bromern: ?You might not realize it, but Alacrity is highly trained in stealth and covert ops.?
/ Alacrity: ?What!??
/ Bromern: ?In fact, he was once an Army Ranger!?
/ Alacrity: ?I?m Canadian!?
/ Bromern: ?A Beaver Hat Ranger, trained in the famous Canadian martial arts, Tym-Hor-Tons!?
/ Alacrity: ?You?re insane.?
Bromern: ?Al will sneak down these stairs, past the guards at the bottom, over a plank across a moat filled with flesh eating zombie snappers to the treasure.?
Alacrity: ?I am? WHOA!?
/ <<SMACK!>>
<<BANG!>>
/ <<CRASH!>>
/ <<SNAP!>>
/ Alacrity: ?ARGH! Aaaaaaaaa!!?
/ <<SPLASH!>>
/ Alacrity: ?OWOWOWOWOW!!?
/ <<BOOM!>>
Bromern: ?Alacrity? Are you okay??
/ Alacrity: ?Medic.?
Bromern: ?There you have it folks! Sneaking in plate armour, not very likely.?
/ Alacrity: ?Cleric??
/ Bromern: ?Al! Get up here and we?ll get you in the chain mail!?
/ Alacrity: ?Last rites??
{{Storyline continues from previous comic}}
[[Matt Milligan, author of Lost and Found comic, is sitting at his drawing board, trying to think up an excuse for not updating the comic. His wife is in the room, and tries to advise him.]]
/ Matt's wife: WHY DON'T YOU JUST ADMIT TO FOLKS THAT YOU GOT ADDICTED TO RESIDENT EVIL 4 AND PLAYED IT EVERY NIGHT INSTEAD OF DRAWING?
[[She smiles while Matt thinks about it.]]
[[Matt starts drawing with a determined look on his face.]]
/ Matt: A ZOMBIE DOG ATE MY HOMEWORK.
Zach: So the first thing we need to do is decide on the name of our band.
/ Bryan: Shouldn't we write some songs or at least decide on a style?
/ Zach: Nope! Once we have a name, we'll know what we should sound like!
Zach: For example, if our name is two badass sounding words crammed together, we'll be an awesome metal band!
/ Bryan: Deathfist!
/ Zach: Murderhole!
/ Bryan: Bloodsword!
/ Zach: Fleshpocalypse!
Bryan: Actually Fleshpocalypse sounds kind of like a zombie porno.
/ Zach: I'd watch that.
(Anthony is still and silent)
Leo: Hey what's up with that guy?
/ Aries: I dunno: He's always there.
Leo: Maybe we should try poking him.
/ Aries: Sure. I guess. It can't hurt right? It might even bring him around. And then we can all go out for ice cream.
Leo: Excuse mr, Mr? Would you like to go out for some ice cream?
Anthony: Oh gosh! What happened? The last thing I remember is poking some zombie-like guy.
Anthony: Oh, hey fellas? Fellas? Are you alright there?
Aries: Woah, I think I zoned out for a minute there. Must be the hot weather. We should really get that ice cream.
/ Leo: You're right. I guess poking won't help after all.
(ice cream is eaten)
