Circle Versus Square - latest additions

Circle Versus Square - latest additions http://circleversussquare.com The latest transcribed Circle Versus Square comics, powered by OhNoRobot.com en-us Mon, 08 Jun 2009 17:42:04 -0000 60 Free At Last? | Circle Versus Square http://circleversussquare.com/?ID=210 http://circleversussquare.com/?ID=210 Mon, 08 Jun 2009 17:33:14 -0000 <a href="http://circleversussquare.com/?ID=210">Free At Last? | Circle Versus Square</a> [[Square and Rectangle.]] Square: Rectangle, the time has come. Rectangle: If this is about another mission, I don't know if - Square: You are no longer my lackey. [[Silent panel.]] Rectangle: Sooooooo, I've graduated? Square: No, you have failed. Square: The only thing you ever got right was when I ordered you to kill your own pet and turn him into delicious soup. Of course, you didn't even realize what you were doing, which is a monument to your complete incompetence and stupidity. Square: Then, once the truth got out, you cried like a pansy instead of taking it like a Square. Rectangle: But, I can't take it like a square! I'm just a rectangle! Square: Then you need to try HARDER to be a square! Rectangle: BUT MY SIDES AREN'T EQUAL! Square: And with that attitude they never WILL be! Square: Actually, with any attitude they never will be. You're kinda screwed there. Rectangle: <<Sniff>> So I guess this means you're gonna tell me to leave and get out of your face? Square: No, Rectangle. [[Square begins to move off-panel.]] Square: You're not my lackey anymore, so I'm not going to tell you to DO anything! And even if I did, you'd just f*%k it all up. You're on your own, jerk. [[Square is gone. Silent panel.]] Rectangle: <<gulp>> Free At Last? | Circle Versus Square

[[Square and Rectangle.]]
Square: Rectangle, the time has come.
Rectangle: If this is about another mission, I don't know if -

Square: You are no longer my lackey.

[[Silent panel.]]

Rectangle: Sooooooo, I've graduated?
Square: No, you have failed.

Square: The only thing you ever got right was when I ordered you to kill your own pet and turn him into delicious soup. Of course, you didn't even realize what you were doing, which is a monument to your complete incompetence and stupidity.

Square: Then, once the truth got out, you cried like a pansy instead of taking it like a Square.
Rectangle: But, I can't take it like a square! I'm just a rectangle!

Square: Then you need to try HARDER to be a square!
Rectangle: BUT MY SIDES AREN'T EQUAL!
Square: And with that attitude they never WILL be!

Square: Actually, with any attitude they never will be. You're kinda screwed there.

Rectangle: <> So I guess this means you're gonna tell me to leave and get out of your face?
Square: No, Rectangle.

[[Square begins to move off-panel.]]
Square: You're not my lackey anymore, so I'm not going to tell you to DO anything! And even if I did, you'd just f*%k it all up.
You're on your own, jerk.

[[Square is gone. Silent panel.]]

Rectangle: <>]]> Horrible Comics | Circle Versus Square http://circleversussquare.com/?ID=209 http://circleversussquare.com/?ID=209 Mon, 08 Jun 2009 17:32:37 -0000 <a href="http://circleversussquare.com/?ID=209">Horrible Comics | Circle Versus Square</a> Square: <<SIGH>> Disappointing. Circle: What do you mean? Square: If you didn't notice, we were on hiatus for nearly a month. Circle: Yeah, so? Square: So with that long a break, I expected a really KICK ASS comic for the comeback! I mean, seriously. We waited THAT long for comic 208? What gives?! Circle: I thought it was fine. Square: "Fine" isn't enough! I'll say it again: I EXPECTED more. Circle: Hmmmm... Circle: But doesn't a lot of humor from gag-a-day comics come from the fact that the punchline breaks your expectations? Square: Well, yeah. Circle: So there! You EXPECTED a better comic, and your expectations were broken! Sounds like a good comic to me! Square: WHAT?! You're advocating for horrible comics! Circle: And why not? Maybe we need to so many horrible comics that the expectation becomes that our comic sucks! Then, we SMASH the expectations with really funny stuff like nobody's every seen! YEAH! From now on, NO MORE PUNCHLINES! Circle: I can't go through with it! Quick! GIVE ME A SETUP! Square: Too late. Horrible Comics | Circle Versus Square

Square: <> Disappointing.
Circle: What do you mean?

Square: If you didn't notice, we were on hiatus for nearly a month.
Circle: Yeah, so?

Square: So with that long a break, I expected a really KICK ASS comic for the comeback! I mean, seriously. We waited THAT long for comic 208? What gives?!
Circle: I thought it was fine.

Square: "Fine" isn't enough! I'll say it again: I EXPECTED more.
Circle: Hmmmm...

Circle: But doesn't a lot of humor from gag-a-day comics come from the fact that the punchline breaks your expectations?
Square: Well, yeah.

Circle: So there! You EXPECTED a better comic, and your expectations were broken! Sounds like a good comic to me!
Square: WHAT?! You're advocating for horrible comics!

Circle: And why not? Maybe we need to so many horrible comics that the expectation becomes that our comic sucks! Then, we SMASH the expectations with really funny stuff like nobody's every seen! YEAH! From now on, NO MORE PUNCHLINES!

Circle: I can't go through with it! Quick! GIVE ME A SETUP!
Square: Too late.]]> *Blech!* | Circle Versus Square http://circleversussquare.com/?ID=208 http://circleversussquare.com/?ID=208 Mon, 08 Jun 2009 17:30:49 -0000 <a href="http://circleversussquare.com/?ID=208">*Blech!* | Circle Versus Square</a> [[Square and Rectangle flank a tombstone reading ?DEAD,? while Triangle, Circle and Heart (with her katana) are gathered in a corner, watching.]] Square: What is this!? So I ate Rectangle?s Turtle, are you guys mad I didn?t share? Rectangle: How could you?! You LIKED Fred! Square: I liked him when I though he was going to be a delicious lunch? Rectangle: <<cry>> <<weep>> Square: And yes, he WAS delicious, but an hour later I was blowing chunks like nobody?s business! Triangle: A gripping tale! Rectangle: Cry! Weep! Square: That reptilian bastard got me on the way up! This is where I spewed, so when Rectangle asked me to lead the service, I just put up a tombstone and called it a day. Rectangle: <<Sniff>> Waaaaah! Square: So if you want to pay your respects to a pile of upchuck then go ahead, be my guest. Rectangle: CRY! WEEP! Square: But let?s not forget, I only ATE the turtle. RECTANGLE killed him! I just tricked him into doing the dirty work because he?s such a gullible idiot! Rectangle: SOB! Square: Was he crying or did he just call me a Son-Of-a-Bitch? Circle: Ahhhhhh, the ambiguity? Rectangle: <<sniff>> *Blech!* | Circle Versus Square

[[Square and Rectangle flank a tombstone reading ?DEAD,? while Triangle, Circle and Heart (with her katana) are gathered in a corner, watching.]]
Square: What is this!? So I ate Rectangle?s Turtle, are you guys mad I didn?t share?
Rectangle: How could you?! You LIKED Fred!

Square: I liked him when I though he was going to be a delicious lunch?
Rectangle: <> <>

Square: And yes, he WAS delicious, but an hour later I was blowing chunks like nobody?s business!
Triangle: A gripping tale!
Rectangle: Cry! Weep!

Square: That reptilian bastard got me on the way up! This is where I spewed, so when Rectangle asked me to lead the service, I just put up a tombstone and called it a day.
Rectangle: <> Waaaaah!

Square: So if you want to pay your respects to a pile of upchuck then go ahead, be my guest.
Rectangle: CRY! WEEP!

Square: But let?s not forget, I only ATE the turtle. RECTANGLE killed him! I just tricked him into doing the dirty work because he?s such a gullible idiot!
Rectangle: SOB!

Square: Was he crying or did he just call me a Son-Of-a-Bitch?
Circle: Ahhhhhh, the ambiguity?
Rectangle: <>]]> Fred | Circle Versus Square http://circleversussquare.com/?ID=207 http://circleversussquare.com/?ID=207 Mon, 08 Jun 2009 17:29:37 -0000 <a href="http://circleversussquare.com/?ID=207">Fred | Circle Versus Square</a> [[Heart with her katana, Rectangle, Square, Circle and Triangle are gathered around a grave bearing the epitaph ?DEAD.? Square is giving a eulogy.]] Square: NEARLY beloved, MOSTLY hated: We are gathered here today to mourn the loss of a turtle. Rectangle: <<cry>> <<sob>> <<weep>> Square: He was a good reptile, generally speaking, and was loved by all? or at least some of us. Rectangle: Why Fred?! WHY DID YOU LEAVE ME!?!? Circle: The turtle?s name was ?Fred?? Square: He is now and forever in our thoughts and um, stuff, at least until tomorrow. Rectangle: I was only trying to make you happy! Square: Rectangle, I know this is hard, but please quiet down. Rectangle: Square said that you would be the happiest turtle in the world if I gave you a bath, so that?s what I did! Square: That?s quite enough. Rectangle: Then he said you wanted an extra HOT bath, so I heated the water just for you! Square: I said that?s ENOUGH! Rectangle: Then he said you would be even HAPPIER if you weren?t carrying around your shell, so I took it off with the tools he gave me! Square: Did that happen? I don?t remember that happening. Rectangle: THEN he said you?d like your bath EVEN MORE if I seasoned it with two medium onions, ? tablespoon of cayenne pepper, 1 and ? teaspoons of salt, 5 tbs. of cubed butter, 1/3 cup all-purpose flour, 2 tbs. of tomato puree, 3 tbs. of Worcestershire sauce? Square: <<gulp>> Rectangle: 1/3 cup chicken broth, 2 hard-boiled eggs, ? cup of lemon juice a few sprigs of chopped fresh parsley (optional)! Square: DAMN IT RECTANGLE! Square: I am TRYING to lead a service here, a service that YOU asked me to do! So would you SHUT UP and show some respect for the DELICOUS? Heart and Rectangle: <<GASP>> Circle and Triangle: <<GASP>> Rectangle: <<whimper>> <<whimper>> Square: Did I say ?delicious?? Because I clearly meant ?VERY delicious.? Rectangle: WAAAAAA!!! Circle: You are in deeeeeeeeeeep sh*t. Fred | Circle Versus Square

[[Heart with her katana, Rectangle, Square, Circle and Triangle are gathered around a grave bearing the epitaph ?DEAD.? Square is giving a eulogy.]]
Square: NEARLY beloved, MOSTLY hated: We are gathered here today to mourn the loss of a turtle.
Rectangle: <> <> <>

Square: He was a good reptile, generally speaking, and was loved by all? or at least some of us.
Rectangle: Why Fred?! WHY DID YOU LEAVE ME!?!?
Circle: The turtle?s name was ?Fred??

Square: He is now and forever in our thoughts and um, stuff, at least until tomorrow.
Rectangle: I was only trying to make you happy!
Square: Rectangle, I know this is hard, but please quiet down.

Rectangle: Square said that you would be the happiest turtle in the world if I gave you a bath, so that?s what I did!
Square: That?s quite enough.

Rectangle: Then he said you wanted an extra HOT bath, so I heated the water just for you!
Square: I said that?s ENOUGH!

Rectangle: Then he said you would be even HAPPIER if you weren?t carrying around your shell, so I took it off with the tools he gave me!
Square: Did that happen? I don?t remember that happening.

Rectangle: THEN he said you?d like your bath EVEN MORE if I seasoned it with two medium onions, ? tablespoon of cayenne pepper, 1 and ? teaspoons of salt, 5 tbs. of cubed butter, 1/3 cup all-purpose flour, 2 tbs. of tomato puree, 3 tbs. of Worcestershire sauce?
Square: <>

Rectangle: 1/3 cup chicken broth, 2 hard-boiled eggs, ? cup of lemon juice a few sprigs of chopped fresh parsley (optional)!
Square: DAMN IT RECTANGLE!

Square: I am TRYING to lead a service here, a service that YOU asked me to do! So would you SHUT UP and show some respect for the DELICOUS?
Heart and Rectangle: <>
Circle and Triangle: <>

Rectangle: <> <>

Square: Did I say ?delicious?? Because I clearly meant ?VERY delicious.?
Rectangle: WAAAAAA!!!
Circle: You are in deeeeeeeeeeep sh*t.]]> Lead My Service | Circle Versus Square http://circleversussquare.com/?ID=206 http://circleversussquare.com/?ID=206 Mon, 08 Jun 2009 17:25:57 -0000 <a href="http://circleversussquare.com/?ID=206">Lead My Service | Circle Versus Square</a> [[Square and Rectangle.]] Rectangle: Square? ummm? I know you?re my boss and all, and I?m not supposed to do anything. But I was wondering, well, hoping if you would, <<gulp>>? Square: SPIT IT OUT! Rectangle: I was wondering if you would lead the funeral service for my pet turtle. Square: <<Ahem>> Square: Why? Rectangle: He died. Square: Right. Square: And that?s the saddest thing, and boo hoo, and let?s get plastered and all that, but your turtle and I never got along, so I don?t have anything good to say about him. Rectangle: Awwwww! But you USED to like him! Rectangle: I thought that?s why you told me to? Square: RIGHT! Let?s just ahhh, keep that between you and me. Square: Tell you what, I?ll lead the service, but you must agree NEVER to talk about your turtle again, starting NOW. Rectangle: <<Cry>> That would make my turtle very happy. Square: I told you NOT to talk about your turtle, and the FIRST thing you did was talk about your turtle! Rectangle: OH! Umm? I was talking about a different turtle. Square: Hmmmmmm? Square: As you are my lackey, and I am training you to be a conniving jerk in our endless war against Circle, I must commend you for lying directly to my face. Square: Nevertheless, you have disobeyed a direct order from your superior and are thus a complete failure. Rectangle: Well, <<sniff>> at least I?m a lying failure. Square: It?s a step in the right direction. Lead My Service | Circle Versus Square

[[Square and Rectangle.]]
Rectangle: Square? ummm? I know you?re my boss and all, and I?m not supposed to do anything. But I was wondering, well, hoping if you would, <>?
Square: SPIT IT OUT!

Rectangle: I was wondering if you would lead the funeral service for my pet turtle.
Square: <>

Square: Why?

Rectangle: He died.
Square: Right.

Square: And that?s the saddest thing, and boo hoo, and let?s get plastered and all that, but your turtle and I never got along, so I don?t have anything good to say about him.
Rectangle: Awwwww! But you USED to like him!

Rectangle: I thought that?s why you told me to?
Square: RIGHT! Let?s just ahhh, keep that between you and me.

Square: Tell you what, I?ll lead the service, but you must agree NEVER to talk about your turtle again, starting NOW.
Rectangle: <> That would make my turtle very happy.

Square: I told you NOT to talk about your turtle, and the FIRST thing you did was talk about your turtle!
Rectangle: OH! Umm? I was talking about a different turtle.

Square: Hmmmmmm?

Square: As you are my lackey, and I am training you to be a conniving jerk in our endless war against Circle, I must commend you for lying directly to my face.

Square: Nevertheless, you have disobeyed a direct order from your superior and are thus a complete failure.
Rectangle: Well, <> at least I?m a lying failure.
Square: It?s a step in the right direction.]]> Hug | Circle Versus Square http://circleversussquare.com/?ID=205 http://circleversussquare.com/?ID=205 Mon, 08 Jun 2009 17:23:58 -0000 <a href="http://circleversussquare.com/?ID=205">Hug | Circle Versus Square</a> [[Heart, with her katana, and Rectangle.]] Heart: Hey Rectangle, sorry to hear your turtle died. Rectangle: <<sniff>> <<sob>> <<cry>> Rectangle: Hug? Heart: Excuse me? Rectangle: HUUUUG? Heart: <<Ahem>> Rectangle: HUUUUUUG? Heart: No. Rectangle: HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUG?! Rectangle: <<sniff>> Heart: Oh? alright. [[Heart moves towards Rectangle.]] [[Heart touches Rectangle.]] Heart and Rectangle: <<hug>> [[Heart moves back a little.]] Rectangle: Thanks Heart. <<sniiiiiiif>> [[Rectangle moves off panel.]] [[Heart moves back to where she was standing before.]] Heart: Poor guy? [[Square moves on panel.]] [[Heart and Square. Silent panel.]] Square: SEEEEEEX? Heart: #^@% off. Hug | Circle Versus Square

[[Heart, with her katana, and Rectangle.]]
Heart: Hey Rectangle, sorry to hear your turtle died.
Rectangle: <> <> <>

Rectangle: Hug?
Heart: Excuse me?

Rectangle: HUUUUG?
Heart: <>

Rectangle: HUUUUUUG?
Heart: No.

Rectangle: HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUG?!

Rectangle: <>

Heart: Oh? alright.

[[Heart moves towards Rectangle.]]

[[Heart touches Rectangle.]]
Heart and Rectangle: <>

[[Heart moves back a little.]]
Rectangle: Thanks Heart. <>

[[Rectangle moves off panel.]]

[[Heart moves back to where she was standing before.]]
Heart: Poor guy?

[[Square moves on panel.]]

[[Heart and Square. Silent panel.]]

Square: SEEEEEEX?
Heart: #^@% off.]]> The Artist's Dilemma | Circle Versus Square http://circleversussquare.com/?ID=204 http://circleversussquare.com/?ID=204 Mon, 08 Jun 2009 17:23:12 -0000 <a href="http://circleversussquare.com/?ID=204">The Artist's Dilemma | Circle Versus Square</a> [[Square and Circle. Circle is standing in front of an easel, which facing away from Square; Circle has a paintbrush and palette, and wears a beret.]] Circle: I have created a masterpiece. Circle: This is beyond horrible. Circle: No no, it?s fine. Circle: This is crap. Circle: Wait, it?s perfect. Circle: I?ve never seen worse art. Circle: I love it. Circle: I hate it. Square: Would you shut up and start painting already!? Circle: Quiet, I?m trying to decide what size canvas to use. The Artist's Dilemma | Circle Versus Square

[[Square and Circle. Circle is standing in front of an easel, which facing away from Square; Circle has a paintbrush and palette, and wears a beret.]]
Circle: I have created a masterpiece.

Circle: This is beyond horrible.

Circle: No no, it?s fine.

Circle: This is crap.

Circle: Wait, it?s perfect.

Circle: I?ve never seen worse art.

Circle: I love it.

Circle: I hate it.

Square: Would you shut up and start painting already!?
Circle: Quiet, I?m trying to decide what size canvas to use.]]> Bastard Hedonists | Circle Versus Square http://circleversussquare.com/?ID=203 http://circleversussquare.com/?ID=203 Mon, 08 Jun 2009 17:22:24 -0000 <a href="http://circleversussquare.com/?ID=203">Bastard Hedonists | Circle Versus Square</a> [[Square and Circle.]] Square: I see right through you, Circle. You say egocentrism is a dead end, but then you say you're "proud" to carry the weight of the world on your shoulders. Square: The only reason you bother feeling sympathy for anyone else is because it makes you feel good about yourself! It's not really about caring is it? It's all about YOU. Circle: How could you POSSIBLY get on my case about this? You have the biggest ego of any shape I know! Square: Well, I'm awesome enough to warrant it. Square: But the point is that while my ego is free of pretense, YOURS is predicated on false altruism. In the end, you don't care about the world. You're just a self-absorbed martyr who only cares about himself. Circle: And I suppose you think we would ALL be better off as egomaniacal bastard hedonists with no regard for the existence of anyone but ourselves. Square: YES I DO. Square: Well, I would be better off, but I'm the only one who matters, right? Circle: Your logic is impeccable. Bastard Hedonists | Circle Versus Square

[[Square and Circle.]]
Square: I see right through you, Circle. You say egocentrism is a dead end, but then you say you're "proud" to carry the weight of the world on your shoulders.

Square: The only reason you bother feeling sympathy for anyone else is because it makes you feel good about yourself! It's not really about caring is it? It's all about YOU.

Circle: How could you POSSIBLY get on my case about this? You have the biggest ego of any shape I know!
Square: Well, I'm awesome enough to warrant it.

Square: But the point is that while my ego is free of pretense, YOURS is predicated on false altruism. In the end, you don't care about the world. You're just a self-absorbed martyr who only cares about himself.

Circle: And I suppose you think we would ALL be better off as egomaniacal bastard hedonists with no regard for the existence of anyone but ourselves.
Square: YES I DO.

Square: Well, I would be better off, but I'm the only one who matters, right?
Circle: Your logic is impeccable.]]> Weight Of The World | Circle Versus Square http://circleversussquare.com/?ID=202 http://circleversussquare.com/?ID=202 Wed, 22 Apr 2009 05:05:28 -0000 <a href="http://circleversussquare.com/?ID=202">Weight Of The World | Circle Versus Square</a> [[Square and Circle.]] Square: So you’re still teaching Rectangle about one-upsmanship, eh? These days I don’t even give a damn. Circle: That’s a change. Square: Well I have nothing to fear, right? You’re so INCOMPETENT at one-upsmanship that you couldn't teach him jack-bubkus even if you tried! Sure you want to get him to turn on me, but seriously you’re too big a softy to pull that off. Circle: HEY! Square: In fact, you two should be spending more time together! You’re both depressed and constantly on the verge of emotional breakdown. Just think of all the hijynks! Circle: What are you talking about! I’m not depressed… Square: Sure you are! You’re on of those “I carry the weight of the world on my shoulders” types. All bothered by “social injustice” and crap like that. Circle: It’s not crap! Square: See! That’s what I’m talking about! A chimp could be falling out of a tree in Zimbabwe right now and you’d gouge your eyes out in horrendous fit of “I should probably be caring about this.” Circle: I DO care! Circle: It’s the responsibility of ALL of us to sympathize with those who suffer. Sympathy is how we connect, and furthermore, the ONLY way we as shapes can truly move forward in this horrible world. Egocentrism is a dead end! So yes, I am PROUD that the weight of the world is ON MY SHOULDERS! [[A buzz comes from somewhere on Square’s person.]] Square: <<Bzzzt>> [[Square takes out and opens his cell phone.]] Square: I just got a text from Rectangle. His pet turtle died. [[Square closes his cell phone.]] Circle: <<HRRRK>> Circle: The weight of the world just got disproportionately heavier. Square: I’m pretty sure it was me not caring. Weight Of The World | Circle Versus Square

[[Square and Circle.]]
Square: So you’re still teaching Rectangle about one-upsmanship, eh? These days I don’t even give a damn.
Circle: That’s a change.

Square: Well I have nothing to fear, right? You’re so INCOMPETENT at one-upsmanship that you couldn't teach him jack-bubkus even if you tried! Sure you want to get him to turn on me, but seriously you’re too big a softy to pull that off.
Circle: HEY!

Square: In fact, you two should be spending more time together! You’re both depressed and constantly on the verge of emotional breakdown. Just think of all the hijynks!
Circle: What are you talking about! I’m not depressed…

Square: Sure you are! You’re on of those “I carry the weight of the world on my shoulders” types. All bothered by “social injustice” and crap like that.
Circle: It’s not crap!

Square: See! That’s what I’m talking about! A chimp could be falling out of a tree in Zimbabwe right now and you’d gouge your eyes out in horrendous fit of “I should probably be caring about this.”
Circle: I DO care!

Circle: It’s the responsibility of ALL of us to sympathize with those who suffer. Sympathy is how we connect, and furthermore, the ONLY way we as shapes can truly move forward in this horrible world. Egocentrism is a dead end! So yes, I am PROUD that the weight of the world is ON MY SHOULDERS!
[[A buzz comes from somewhere on Square’s person.]]
Square: <>

[[Square takes out and opens his cell phone.]]
Square: I just got a text from Rectangle.
His pet turtle died.

[[Square closes his cell phone.]]
Circle: <>

Circle: The weight of the world just got disproportionately heavier.
Square: I’m pretty sure it was me not caring.]]> Bring On The Hate | Circle Versus Square http://circleversussquare.com/?ID=201 http://circleversussquare.com/?ID=201 Wed, 22 Apr 2009 05:03:28 -0000 <a href="http://circleversussquare.com/?ID=201">Bring On The Hate | Circle Versus Square</a> [[Circle and Rectangle]] Circle: Alright Rectangle, I don't care how depressed you are, I've made it my personal mission to make you great at the game of one-upsmanship. Rectangle: That's nice of you, but I'm so horrible at it! I don't think ANYONE can help. Circle: Don't be so hard on yourself! We'll start with the basics. On my mark, you say "I hate you," and I'll say "Bring it." Rectangle: You say you hate me, and I say "Bring it?" Circle: Close! But this time, YOU say "I hate you," and I say "Bring it." Rectangle: OK, got it! Circle: Ready? GO! Rectangle: I HATE ME! Circle: GAAAAH! Rectangle: Did I get it right? 'Cause that felt GREAT! Circle: You are FAR too good at self-loathing. Bring On The Hate | Circle Versus Square

[[Circle and Rectangle]]
Circle: Alright Rectangle, I don't care how depressed you are, I've made it my personal mission to make you great at the game of one-upsmanship.
Rectangle: That's nice of you, but I'm so horrible at it! I don't think ANYONE can help.

Circle: Don't be so hard on yourself! We'll start with the basics. On my mark, you say "I hate you," and I'll say "Bring it."
Rectangle: You say you hate me, and I say "Bring it?"

Circle: Close! But this time, YOU say "I hate you," and I say "Bring it."
Rectangle: OK, got it!
Circle: Ready? GO!

Rectangle: I HATE ME!
Circle: GAAAAH!

Rectangle: Did I get it right? 'Cause that felt GREAT!
Circle: You are FAR too good at self-loathing.]]>