http://questionablecontent.net The latest transcribed Questionable Content comics, powered by OhNoRobot.com en-us Sun, 19 Apr 2009 20:59:15 -0000 60 http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=273 http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=273 Mon, 09 Mar 2009 01:48:42 -0000 <a href="http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=273">Questionable Content Number 273 : Rooby-Roo</a><br> <br> Faye: What do you think of these? <br \> Marten: Ehh, I don't really like horn-rims that much. <br \> <br \> Faye: Wow, you must be the only indie boy on earth who doesn't have a soft spot for the whole "sexy librarian" look. <br \> Marten: I had a traumatic experience involving a late library book when I was eleven. <br \> <br \> Faye: I think it's all a confidence thing. Hipster kids fetishized the nerdy look because they felt that anything ostentatiously pretty was out of their league. <br \> Marten: It's like Scooby-Doo. If you can't hook up with Daphne, settle for Velma. <br \> <br \> Marten: Now that I think about it, Velma was kinda hot, in a weird way. <br \> Faye: Underneath that orange sweater lie the dreams of many an introverted young man. Questionable Content Number 273 : Rooby-Roo

Faye: What do you think of these?
Marten: Ehh, I don't really like horn-rims that much.

Faye: Wow, you must be the only indie boy on earth who doesn't have a soft spot for the whole "sexy librarian" look.
Marten: I had a traumatic experience involving a late library book when I was eleven.

Faye: I think it's all a confidence thing. Hipster kids fetishized the nerdy look because they felt that anything ostentatiously pretty was out of their league.
Marten: It's like Scooby-Doo. If you can't hook up with Daphne, settle for Velma.

Marten: Now that I think about it, Velma was kinda hot, in a weird way.
Faye: Underneath that orange sweater lie the dreams of many an introverted young man.]]> http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=272 http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=272 Mon, 09 Mar 2009 01:48:35 -0000 <a href="http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=272">Questionable Content Number 272 : Bad Psychoanalysis</a><br> <br> Faye: There's nothing quite like the feeling of buying new glasses. <br \> Marten: How so? <br \> <br \> Faye: I dunno, I just like wearing glasses. <br \> Marten: Is it some sort of unconcious defense mechanism? I bet it is. <br \> <br \> Faye: What are you talking about? <br \> Marten: The glasses are your way of putting a barrier between yourself and other people. They make you feel safer, so you can retain control of the situation. <br \> Faye: You know, that would make a lot of sense... <br \> <br \> Faye:...If it weren't complete and utter bullcrap. I wear glasses because I think they look nice. Thats all there is to it. Sometimes a cigar really is just a cigar, Marten. <br \> Marten: Wait, why did you bring up cigars all of a sudden? Do you have some weird phallic issues that we need to talk about? Questionable Content Number 272 : Bad Psychoanalysis

Faye: There's nothing quite like the feeling of buying new glasses.
Marten: How so?

Faye: I dunno, I just like wearing glasses.
Marten: Is it some sort of unconcious defense mechanism? I bet it is.

Faye: What are you talking about?
Marten: The glasses are your way of putting a barrier between yourself and other people. They make you feel safer, so you can retain control of the situation.
Faye: You know, that would make a lot of sense...

Faye:...If it weren't complete and utter bullcrap. I wear glasses because I think they look nice. Thats all there is to it. Sometimes a cigar really is just a cigar, Marten.
Marten: Wait, why did you bring up cigars all of a sudden? Do you have some weird phallic issues that we need to talk about?]]> http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=271 http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=271 Mon, 09 Mar 2009 01:48:32 -0000 <a href="http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=271">Questionable Content Number 271 : Cuteometer</a><br> <br> Faye: Come on Marten, you're coming to help me shop for some new glasses. <br \> Marten: Actually I kinda wanted to restring my guitar, can I just- <br \> Faye: No. You are coming with me, and that is that. <br \> <br \> Marten: May I ask why you're so adamant about me tagging along? <br \> Faye: I need the opinion of a boy who enjoys looking at ladies, and you fit the bill. <br \> <br \> Marten: Thats an...interesting...point of view for you to be concerned with. <br \> Faye: I may not be pursuing romance right now, but that doesn't mean I don't want heads to turn when I walk down the street. <br \> <br \> Faye: Just think of yourself as a Geiger counter for my attractiveness. <br \> Marten: I'm just a canary in the coal mine of your beauty, baby. <br \> Pintsize: Isn't that a B.B. King song? Questionable Content Number 271 : Cuteometer

Faye: Come on Marten, you're coming to help me shop for some new glasses.
Marten: Actually I kinda wanted to restring my guitar, can I just-
Faye: No. You are coming with me, and that is that.

Marten: May I ask why you're so adamant about me tagging along?
Faye: I need the opinion of a boy who enjoys looking at ladies, and you fit the bill.

Marten: Thats an...interesting...point of view for you to be concerned with.
Faye: I may not be pursuing romance right now, but that doesn't mean I don't want heads to turn when I walk down the street.

Faye: Just think of yourself as a Geiger counter for my attractiveness.
Marten: I'm just a canary in the coal mine of your beauty, baby.
Pintsize: Isn't that a B.B. King song?]]> http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=161 http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=161 Wed, 25 Feb 2009 01:59:57 -0000 <a href="http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=161">Number 161: His Uncle Was A Lion-Tamer</a><br> <br> Faye: . . .So I come downstairs to get a drink of water at like 3AM when I hear these odd moaning noises coming from within the kitchen. I go in and turn on the light to find my mother bent over the dinner table and my dad totally boning her from behind! <br \> Marten: Augh! Holy shit! Hahahaha! <br \> <br \> Faye: That is when I screamed, which startled my dad so much that he slipped and fell, dragging my mother down with him and hitting both of their heads on the hardwood floor. They were both knocked unconscious, so I covered them up with some towels, called 911, and spent the rest of the night hiding in my room. <br \> Marten: Hee hee, that is awful but totally hilarious at the same time. <br \> <br \> Faye: That is just one of the many funny stories involving my father. <br \> Marten: You'll have to tell me the rest sometime. <br \> Faye: Bribe me with more ice cream and maybe I will! <br \> <br \> Faye: What about you, Marten? Do you have any funny tales about your parents? <br \> Marten: Well, my mom is a professional dominatrix and my dad runs a gay nightclub, so I can't really tell the difference between a "funny tale" and "my entire adolescence" anymore. Number 161: His Uncle Was A Lion-Tamer

Faye: . . .So I come downstairs to get a drink of water at like 3AM when I hear these odd moaning noises coming from within the kitchen. I go in and turn on the light to find my mother bent over the dinner table and my dad totally boning her from behind!
Marten: Augh! Holy shit! Hahahaha!

Faye: That is when I screamed, which startled my dad so much that he slipped and fell, dragging my mother down with him and hitting both of their heads on the hardwood floor. They were both knocked unconscious, so I covered them up with some towels, called 911, and spent the rest of the night hiding in my room.
Marten: Hee hee, that is awful but totally hilarious at the same time.

Faye: That is just one of the many funny stories involving my father.
Marten: You'll have to tell me the rest sometime.
Faye: Bribe me with more ice cream and maybe I will!

Faye: What about you, Marten? Do you have any funny tales about your parents?
Marten: Well, my mom is a professional dominatrix and my dad runs a gay nightclub, so I can't really tell the difference between a "funny tale" and "my entire adolescence" anymore.]]> http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=160 http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=160 Wed, 25 Feb 2009 01:59:41 -0000 <a href="http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=160">Guest Strip by Julia Keene www.okaypants.com</a><br> <br> Faye: Listening to music is fun! <br \> Dora: I agree! Let's go! <br \> <br \> Faye: Aw yay! Lalala! <br \> Dora: Zzz. <br \> <br \> Dora: I know a better kind! <br \> <br \> Dora: Come on, Faye! You like guitars! <br \> Faye: Not the kind that sound as if they are angry with me for doing something too terrible to even mention. Guest Strip by Julia Keene www.okaypants.com

Faye: Listening to music is fun!
Dora: I agree! Let's go!

Faye: Aw yay! Lalala!
Dora: Zzz.

Dora: I know a better kind!

Dora: Come on, Faye! You like guitars!
Faye: Not the kind that sound as if they are angry with me for doing something too terrible to even mention.]]> http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=16 http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=16 Wed, 25 Feb 2009 01:59:39 -0000 <a href="http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=16">Questionable Content</a><br> <br> {{title text: Number Sixteen: You're Ruining The Moment}} <br \> <br \> Narrator: Questionable Content Presents: <br \> Narrator: The Four Types of Annoying Concert-Goers <br \> <br \> Narrator: The Fashion Whore <br \> [[The Fashion Whore has black hair, black eyebrows, and a black goatee, and wears black sunglasses and a dark brown shirt. He's standing on the left, behind Marten]] <br \> Fashion whore: I'd dance, but it would ruin my perfectly-tousled hair. <br \> <br \> Narrator: The Chatterboxes <br \> [[The talking chatterbox has blonde spiky hair, a red T-shirt with a yellow star on it, and a choker around her neck. Her friend is wearing a blue sweater. They're standing on the left, behind Marten]] <br \> Chatterbox: Oh my God so she was like totally cheating on Scott with time and he had no idea but he was really hooking up with Carol anyway so I said to Julie... <br \> <br \> Narrator: The One-Man Mosh Pit <br \> [[The One-Man Mosh Pit has brown hair and a black shirt with a chest pocket, is throwing 'the horns' \m/ with one hand, and shoving Marten with the other]] <br \> One-Man Mosh Pit: WOOOOO ROCKANDROLL!!! <br \> <<Shove>> <br \> <br \> Narrator: The Frontline Soldier <br \> [[Frontline Soldier is a blond guy talking at a thoroughly annoyed Marten]] <br \> Frontline Soldier: Come on man let me up to the front my friends are up there give me a break man me through don't be dick come on <br \> <br \> Narrator: Please, don't be any of these people. Questionable Content

{{title text: Number Sixteen: You're Ruining The Moment}}

Narrator: Questionable Content Presents:
Narrator: The Four Types of Annoying Concert-Goers

Narrator: The Fashion Whore
[[The Fashion Whore has black hair, black eyebrows, and a black goatee, and wears black sunglasses and a dark brown shirt. He's standing on the left, behind Marten]]
Fashion whore: I'd dance, but it would ruin my perfectly-tousled hair.

Narrator: The Chatterboxes
[[The talking chatterbox has blonde spiky hair, a red T-shirt with a yellow star on it, and a choker around her neck. Her friend is wearing a blue sweater. They're standing on the left, behind Marten]]
Chatterbox: Oh my God so she was like totally cheating on Scott with time and he had no idea but he was really hooking up with Carol anyway so I said to Julie...

Narrator: The One-Man Mosh Pit
[[The One-Man Mosh Pit has brown hair and a black shirt with a chest pocket, is throwing 'the horns' \m/ with one hand, and shoving Marten with the other]]
One-Man Mosh Pit: WOOOOO ROCKANDROLL!!!
<>

Narrator: The Frontline Soldier
[[Frontline Soldier is a blond guy talking at a thoroughly annoyed Marten]]
Frontline Soldier: Come on man let me up to the front my friends are up there give me a break man me through don't be dick come on

Narrator: Please, don't be any of these people.]]> http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=159 http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=159 Wed, 25 Feb 2009 01:59:36 -0000 <a href="http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=159">Questionable Content: New comics every Monday through Friday</a><br> <br> {{Guest strip by John A of "Scary Go Round"}} <br \> Faye: Camping! This is the life, Marten. What a good idea. <br \> Marten: I thought you would enjoy it. Making your way in the world today takes everything you've got! <br \> Faye [[smelling a flower]]: Yes. Taking a break from all your worries sure does help a lot. <br \> Marten: I've built a fire, we've achieved caveman strength. What's for dinner? <br \> Pintsize [[dragging a dead cow behind him]]: I have been foraging. Who wants tossed salads and scrambled cow? Questionable Content: New comics every Monday through Friday

{{Guest strip by John A of "Scary Go Round"}}
Faye: Camping! This is the life, Marten. What a good idea.
Marten: I thought you would enjoy it. Making your way in the world today takes everything you've got!
Faye [[smelling a flower]]: Yes. Taking a break from all your worries sure does help a lot.
Marten: I've built a fire, we've achieved caveman strength. What's for dinner?
Pintsize [[dragging a dead cow behind him]]: I have been foraging. Who wants tossed salads and scrambled cow?]]> http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=158 http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=158 Wed, 25 Feb 2009 01:59:33 -0000 <a href="http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=158">Guest Strip by Yuko Ota http://aido.furvect.com/fallen.htm</a><br> <br> Faye: Er, Marten. . . <br \> <br \> Faye: I think I may have done something foolish. . . <br \> Marten: Should I be sitting down for this? <br \> <br \> Faye: Well, you see. . .I was taking a shower and Pintsize snuck in. . .and I finally got fed up with his perverted hijinks. . . <br \> Marten: What's that noise. . .? <br \> <br \> Faye: So as punishment, I uploaded about a hundred Raffi songs onto him. <br \> Marten: Do a hundred Raffi songs even exist? <br \> Pintsize: Bay-bee beluuuga - in deep blue sea! - so wild and swim so free! Hea-ven above and sea be-low! And a little white whale on the go! <br \> <br \> Marten: . . .I'm going to bed. <br \> Pintsize: You brush your teeth chee-cha-chee-chee cha-chee-chee-chee-chee brush your teeth!!! <br \> Faye: Cough. Guest Strip by Yuko Ota http://aido.furvect.com/fallen.htm

Faye: Er, Marten. . .

Faye: I think I may have done something foolish. . .
Marten: Should I be sitting down for this?

Faye: Well, you see. . .I was taking a shower and Pintsize snuck in. . .and I finally got fed up with his perverted hijinks. . .
Marten: What's that noise. . .?

Faye: So as punishment, I uploaded about a hundred Raffi songs onto him.
Marten: Do a hundred Raffi songs even exist?
Pintsize: Bay-bee beluuuga - in deep blue sea! - so wild and swim so free! Hea-ven above and sea be-low! And a little white whale on the go!

Marten: . . .I'm going to bed.
Pintsize: You brush your teeth chee-cha-chee-chee cha-chee-chee-chee-chee brush your teeth!!!
Faye: Cough.]]> http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=157 http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=157 Wed, 25 Feb 2009 01:59:31 -0000 <a href="http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=157">Questionable Content: New comics every Monday through Friday</a><br> <br> Kimmie: Dora! I missed you! <br \> Dora: Kimmie? Kimberly Miller? <br \> <br \> Dora: You must be, what, fifteen now? <br \> Kimmie: No. I am eternal. <br \> <br \> Kimmie: I'm a vampire, like you. <br \> Dora: No, wait, hold on...I don't do that any more. <br \> <br \> Kimmie: But you were MY IDOL! <br \> Dora: You can still idolize my bottom if you want. <br \> Kimmie: Is it... <br \> Dora: Yes, it is ETERNAL AS HELL. Questionable Content: New comics every Monday through Friday

Kimmie: Dora! I missed you!
Dora: Kimmie? Kimberly Miller?

Dora: You must be, what, fifteen now?
Kimmie: No. I am eternal.

Kimmie: I'm a vampire, like you.
Dora: No, wait, hold on...I don't do that any more.

Kimmie: But you were MY IDOL!
Dora: You can still idolize my bottom if you want.
Kimmie: Is it...
Dora: Yes, it is ETERNAL AS HELL.]]> http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=156 http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=156 Wed, 25 Feb 2009 01:59:28 -0000 <a href="http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=156">Questionable Content: New comics every Monday through Friday</a><br> <br> {{Guest strip by Brian Carroll of Instant Classic}} <br \> [[Two marionettes appear in front of a red curtain, under the caption "Questionable Puppet Theater"]] <br \> Faye: Marten, I hope I am not alone in my desire to participate in daily indie activities. <br \> Marten: Certainly not, Faye. I have been up all night preparing a list of such events we could partake in. <br \> Faye: Where is this list so that I may eliminate less-than-spectacular choices for our enjoyment? <br \> Marten: It's... um... in my pocket. But that is not important. You know, the usual things that indie kids like us love to do. Such as... listening to indie music? <br \> Faye: Marten, I do hope that "listening to music" is not the only item on your list. I would be thoroughly disappointed if your list was as long as a fortune cookie message and not the Christmas list of entertainment you built it up to be. <br \> Marten: I have more... um, listening to more music... <br \> Faye: I wonder to myself if there is even a list at all as Marten's pores seem to be secreting deception. <br \> Marten: Faye, I apologize, there is no list. In fact, I have a confession to make, instead of making the list, I stayed up all night listening to Creed. <br \> Faye: Le gasp! <br \> Marten: I also bought an SUV and participated in a personal marathon of the hit TV show "Friends." <br \> Faye: Marten, you sicken me with your newfound love in American mainstream popular culture, leave my sight. <br \> [[Marten puppet exits]] <br \> Faye: I admit to myself that I am now lonely. Questionable Content: New comics every Monday through Friday

{{Guest strip by Brian Carroll of Instant Classic}}
[[Two marionettes appear in front of a red curtain, under the caption "Questionable Puppet Theater"]]
Faye: Marten, I hope I am not alone in my desire to participate in daily indie activities.
Marten: Certainly not, Faye. I have been up all night preparing a list of such events we could partake in.
Faye: Where is this list so that I may eliminate less-than-spectacular choices for our enjoyment?
Marten: It's... um... in my pocket. But that is not important. You know, the usual things that indie kids like us love to do. Such as... listening to indie music?
Faye: Marten, I do hope that "listening to music" is not the only item on your list. I would be thoroughly disappointed if your list was as long as a fortune cookie message and not the Christmas list of entertainment you built it up to be.
Marten: I have more... um, listening to more music...
Faye: I wonder to myself if there is even a list at all as Marten's pores seem to be secreting deception.
Marten: Faye, I apologize, there is no list. In fact, I have a confession to make, instead of making the list, I stayed up all night listening to Creed.
Faye: Le gasp!
Marten: I also bought an SUV and participated in a personal marathon of the hit TV show "Friends."
Faye: Marten, you sicken me with your newfound love in American mainstream popular culture, leave my sight.
[[Marten puppet exits]]
Faye: I admit to myself that I am now lonely.]]>