More Damn Robots - latest additions

More Damn Robots - latest additions http://livejournal.com/~moredamnrobots The latest transcribed More Damn Robots comics, powered by OhNoRobot.com en-us Mon, 20 Apr 2009 19:09:46 -0000 60 Robot #8: PortmanteauBot http://livejournal.com/~moredamnrobots/3311.html http://livejournal.com/~moredamnrobots/3311.html Thu, 08 Dec 2005 19:39:56 -0000 <a href="http://livejournal.com/~moredamnrobots/3311.html">Robot #8: PortmanteauBot</a> current mood: conniving current music: "C.R.E.E.P." - The Fall searching eye (remember Alpha 5 from Power Rangers? Something like that.) "suction" brings a large suitcase into the curvaceous robot's stomach chamber, which has a book-drop-like opening, for "storage." fancy confiscates large pieces of inconveniently-placed unclaimed luggage. benefits: -no more obstructive junk to trip on at the train station. -some people's junk is cool. I'm home. Last night's train ride was quick; I spent it reading Love Fights [http://www.onipress.com/titles/titles.php?id=LF1] and listening to music. I can't honestly say that I tripped over any luggage -- in fact, mine was in the way some of the time, despite my best efforts. I have this huge new luggage bag. It has wheels. I hope nobody steals it, unless it's PortmanteauBot, in which case I'll just get it back anyway. Robot #8: PortmanteauBot

current mood: conniving
current music: "C.R.E.E.P." - The Fall

searching eye (remember Alpha 5 from Power Rangers? Something like that.)
"suction" brings a large suitcase into the curvaceous robot's stomach chamber, which has a book-drop-like opening, for "storage."
fancy
confiscates large pieces of inconveniently-placed unclaimed luggage.
benefits: -no more obstructive junk to trip on at the train station.
-some people's junk is cool.

I'm home. Last night's train ride was quick; I spent it reading Love Fights [http://www.onipress.com/titles/titles.php?id=LF1] and listening to music. I can't honestly say that I tripped over any luggage -- in fact, mine was in the way some of the time, despite my best efforts. I have this huge new luggage bag. It has wheels. I hope nobody steals it, unless it's PortmanteauBot, in which case I'll just get it back anyway.]]> Robot #7: It's a 'Comeaubot'. http://livejournal.com/~moredamnrobots/2733.html http://livejournal.com/~moredamnrobots/2733.html Thu, 08 Dec 2005 19:39:56 -0000 <a href="http://livejournal.com/~moredamnrobots/2733.html">Robot #7: It's a 'Comeaubot'.</a> current mood: sycophantic current music: "The Bleeding Heart Show" - The New Pornographers In an obvious homage to www.asofterworld.com, different sections of the same drawing of a robot are arranged across three panels, using the ASW template with the words "more damn robots" replacing "a softer world" claw hands, lightbulb eyes, weels for legs, a trashcan torso, and no heart to break. I'm sorry this took so long, but I just did it today, and as you can probably tell, it took a lot of work. I hope that Mr. Comeau and Ms. Horne have a good sense of humor and don't take me into court. (I'm going to email them with this, or else I couldn't imagine they'd ever find it.) Besides being an homage to A Softer World, this is also based upon a haiku that I wrote, which was originally on my other live journal [www.livejournal.com/~stewbreezy]. Just so you know... Robot #7: It's a 'Comeaubot'.

current mood: sycophantic
current music: "The Bleeding Heart Show" - The New Pornographers

In an obvious homage to www.asofterworld.com, different sections of the same drawing of a robot are arranged across three panels, using the ASW template with the words "more damn robots" replacing "a softer world"

claw hands,
lightbulb eyes,

weels for
legs, a
trashcan torso,

and no
heart
to break.

I'm sorry this took so long, but I just did it today, and as you can probably tell, it took a lot of work. I hope that Mr. Comeau and Ms. Horne have a good sense of humor and don't take me into court. (I'm going to email them with this, or else I couldn't imagine they'd ever find it.)
Besides being an homage to A Softer World, this is also based upon a haiku that I wrote, which was originally on my other live journal [www.livejournal.com/~stewbreezy]. Just so you know...]]> "Robot" #6: NO THAT DOES NOT COUNT. http://livejournal.com/~moredamnrobots/2061.html http://livejournal.com/~moredamnrobots/2061.html Thu, 08 Dec 2005 19:39:56 -0000 <a href="http://livejournal.com/~moredamnrobots/2061.html">"Robot" #6: NO THAT DOES NOT COUNT.</a> current mood: busy current music: "A Century Of Fakers" - Belle & Sebastian There is a washing machine with sad eyes, long coils for arms, and cardboard feet. Washing Machine w/ Eyes & Limbs: NOT a robot. It is fun to make your own fake robots, and I encourage you to do it if you are so inclined, but just know that it is not the real deal. You will have to come to terms with that eventually. Well then, I guess it looks like I don't actually have a "robot" for you this week. Here's my lame-ass series of excuses: I have been pretty busy with the mid-term/pre-Halloween rush. I was Richie Tenenbaum for Halloween, which was no small feat: [picture of Steve Subrizi dressed as Ritchie Tenenbaum] I am also acting in two films that shot/are shooting last weekend, this weekend, and the weekend after that. In one, I play an air guitarist. In the other, I play the messy but lovable roommate. So really, I'm not doing much "acting" in either. But it is time-consuming. More inventing to come. "Robot" #6: NO THAT DOES NOT COUNT.

current mood: busy
current music: "A Century Of Fakers" - Belle & Sebastian

There is a washing machine with sad eyes, long coils for arms, and cardboard feet.
Washing Machine w/ Eyes & Limbs: NOT a robot.

It is fun to make your own fake robots, and I encourage you to do it if you are so inclined, but just know that it is not the real deal. You will have to come to terms with that eventually.
Well then, I guess it looks like I don't actually have a "robot" for you this week. Here's my lame-ass series of excuses:
I have been pretty busy with the mid-term/pre-Halloween rush. I was Richie Tenenbaum for Halloween, which was no small feat:
[picture of Steve Subrizi dressed as Ritchie Tenenbaum]
I am also acting in two films that shot/are shooting last weekend, this weekend, and the weekend after that. In one, I play an air guitarist. In the other, I play the messy but lovable roommate. So really, I'm not doing much "acting" in either. But it is time-consuming.
More inventing to come.]]> Robot #5: Mr. Nappy http://livejournal.com/~moredamnrobots/1840.html http://livejournal.com/~moredamnrobots/1840.html Thu, 08 Dec 2005 19:39:56 -0000 <a href="http://livejournal.com/~moredamnrobots/1840.html">Robot #5: Mr. Nappy</a> current mood: sleepy current music: "When You Sleep" - My Bloody Valentine A cyllindrical robot opens its latched mouth and a bag of pebbles extends out like a boxing glove. Its chest has an LCD screen that says "4:00." A satellite spins on the top of its head. "LIGHTS OUT, JERK." - Intolerant of all sounds above (x) decibels after (y) o'clock. - Full of pebbles (referring to the "boxing glove") - Stealthy air-glide motion. Ideal for: - dormatories, - libraries Could potentially interfere with: - fire alarms, - those in sudden need of medical attention. Scientific community, if you only create one of my robots, please make it this one. The people who live above me seem to be fond of Trance music. I am a peace-loving man, but I am also a sleep-loving man. Just do what you can and I will be grateful. As for the rest of you: it's going to be Halloween soon! I hope that you're as excited as I am, because I am going to get a whole crazy lot of candy. And I have a costume and I'm going to get a little pumpkin for the room (I hope I remember to throw it away before winter break this year) and...oh boy oh boy oh boy! I won't be doing much sleeping next Monday night. No-siree. For those of you who don't know me personally, I am ten years old. Robot #5: Mr. Nappy

current mood: sleepy
current music: "When You Sleep" - My Bloody Valentine

A cyllindrical robot opens its latched mouth and a bag of pebbles extends out like a boxing glove. Its chest has an LCD screen that says "4:00." A satellite spins on the top of its head.
"LIGHTS OUT, JERK."
- Intolerant of all sounds above (x) decibels after (y) o'clock.
- Full of pebbles (referring to the "boxing glove")
- Stealthy air-glide motion.
Ideal for: - dormatories, - libraries
Could potentially interfere with: - fire alarms, - those in sudden need of medical attention.

Scientific community, if you only create one of my robots, please make it this one. The people who live above me seem to be fond of Trance music. I am a peace-loving man, but I am also a sleep-loving man. Just do what you can and I will be grateful.
As for the rest of you: it's going to be Halloween soon! I hope that you're as excited as I am, because I am going to get a whole crazy lot of candy. And I have a costume and I'm going to get a little pumpkin for the room (I hope I remember to throw it away before winter break this year) and...oh boy oh boy oh boy! I won't be doing much sleeping next Monday night. No-siree.
For those of you who don't know me personally, I am ten years old.]]> Robot #4: Baloogatron http://livejournal.com/~moredamnrobots/1751.html http://livejournal.com/~moredamnrobots/1751.html Thu, 08 Dec 2005 19:39:56 -0000 <a href="http://livejournal.com/~moredamnrobots/1751.html">Robot #4: Baloogatron</a> current mood: dorky current music: "The Mariner's Revenge Song" - The Decemberists A robotic whale smiles and shoots water from its blowhole. It has four fins. Baloogatron Sooner or later, we will run out of real whales. -Let's give them 2 more fins! It's just common sense. Eventually, we will be fresh out of whales, and then what will we look at from glass-bottom boats? Whom (besides dolphins, trees, and the environment in general) will protestors nag us into saving? Who will be our whales? As always, "robots" is the answer. The idea of replacing an absent species with robotics is not unprecedented. Take "Real Dolls", for example; those poor people have no real lovers to fulfill them, so look what they do. Actually, don't. You're better off not looking. Just watch the whales. Robot #4: Baloogatron

current mood: dorky
current music: "The Mariner's Revenge Song" - The Decemberists

A robotic whale smiles and shoots water from its blowhole. It has four fins.
Baloogatron
Sooner or later, we will run out of real whales.
-Let's give them 2 more fins!

It's just common sense. Eventually, we will be fresh out of whales, and then what will we look at from glass-bottom boats? Whom (besides dolphins, trees, and the environment in general) will protestors nag us into saving? Who will be our whales? As always, "robots" is the answer.
The idea of replacing an absent species with robotics is not unprecedented. Take "Real Dolls", for example; those poor people have no real lovers to fulfill them, so look what they do. Actually, don't. You're better off not looking. Just watch the whales.]]> Robot #3: Hughes-O-Matic http://livejournal.com/~moredamnrobots/1428.html http://livejournal.com/~moredamnrobots/1428.html Thu, 08 Dec 2005 19:39:56 -0000 <a href="http://livejournal.com/~moredamnrobots/1428.html">Robot #3: Hughes-O-Matic</a> current mood: amorous current music: "Pretty In Pink" - The Psychedelic Furs A robot with eighties-style glasses and fake metal hair stands in front of a film projector and reads from a paper printing from its stomach: "No more yanky my wanky," he vowed, then rose up from the dewey Shermer, Illinois grass like some great Foreign-Exchange-Phoenix. It will be the task of the Hughes-O-Matic to produce novelizations of 1980's teen romance films. The Hughes-O-Matic, or HughMo, as he is chidingly referred to by his robo-buddies, has serious aspirations as an author. Unfortunately, capitalism being as it is, he complies to his lucrative practice in the hopes of one day rising above it. The complicated thing is, a part of him really does love those teen movies. I hope that everyone had a happy Columbus Day. We must remember the suffering of those poor Enjuns because now Whitey enjoys the fruits of their suffering. If we are not appreciative of that, then their pain will have been for naught. It was also Canadian Thanksgiving. I think it was probably safer, PC-wise, to have enjoyed that. But hey, differnet strokes for internet Robot #3: Hughes-O-Matic

current mood: amorous
current music: "Pretty In Pink" - The Psychedelic Furs

A robot with eighties-style glasses and fake metal hair stands in front of a film projector and reads from a paper printing from its stomach: "No more yanky my wanky," he vowed, then rose up from the dewey Shermer, Illinois grass like some great Foreign-Exchange-Phoenix.
It will be the task of the Hughes-O-Matic to produce novelizations of 1980's teen romance films.

The Hughes-O-Matic, or HughMo, as he is chidingly referred to by his robo-buddies, has serious aspirations as an author. Unfortunately, capitalism being as it is, he complies to his lucrative practice in the hopes of one day rising above it. The complicated thing is, a part of him really does love those teen movies.
I hope that everyone had a happy Columbus Day. We must remember the suffering of those poor Enjuns because now Whitey enjoys the fruits of their suffering. If we are not appreciative of that, then their pain will have been for naught. It was also Canadian Thanksgiving. I think it was probably safer, PC-wise, to have enjoyed that. But hey, differnet strokes for internet]]> Robot #2: VampíroBot http://livejournal.com/~moredamnrobots/1215.html http://livejournal.com/~moredamnrobots/1215.html Thu, 08 Dec 2005 19:39:56 -0000 <a href="http://livejournal.com/~moredamnrobots/1215.html">Robot #2: VampíroBot</a> current mood: thirsty current music: Real Vampires EP - Mon Frere VampíroBot A fanged, vacant-eyed, square-headed robot with antennae, bat-like wings, claws, jet engines on its legs, and a droopy stomach with a tank for blood in it hovers over a sepia background. A multi-purpose 'droid. Can: - collect blood for "human" vampires during the day (when it is inconvenient for them to do so on own). - collect "donations" for Red Cross, or other needy blood-charity of choice. - stone-cold suck your blood and make you a vampire. Watch out. Don't let those people who buy expensive fake fangs and "feed" on "life energy" fool you; vampires are really cool. They came from Transylvania. Incidentally, I'm told that some Jews come from there as well. Which brings me to my next point: Happy Rosh Hashana everybody! Have some challah and apples, and pour honey on that shit. Come on, everybody. You'll like it. Robot #2: VampíroBot

current mood: thirsty
current music: Real Vampires EP - Mon Frere
VampíroBot

A fanged, vacant-eyed, square-headed robot with antennae, bat-like wings, claws, jet engines on its legs, and a droopy stomach with a tank for blood in it hovers over a sepia background.
A multi-purpose 'droid. Can:
- collect blood for "human" vampires during the day (when it is inconvenient for them to do so on own).
- collect "donations" for Red Cross, or other needy blood-charity of choice.
- stone-cold suck your blood and make you a vampire. Watch out.

Don't let those people who buy expensive fake fangs and "feed" on "life energy" fool you; vampires are really cool. They came from Transylvania. Incidentally, I'm told that some Jews come from there as well. Which brings me to my next point: Happy Rosh Hashana everybody! Have some challah and apples, and pour honey on that shit. Come on, everybody. You'll like it.]]> Robot #1: The Fuck-Off Machine http://livejournal.com/~moredamnrobots/673.html http://livejournal.com/~moredamnrobots/673.html Thu, 08 Dec 2005 19:39:56 -0000 <a href="http://livejournal.com/~moredamnrobots/673.html">Robot #1: The Fuck-Off Machine</a> Current mood: misanthropic Current music: "Something Against You" - Pixies A trashcan-shaped robot, with an angry face drawn on it and several arms, all "giving the finger," waving from above its torso, says, "RRG..." -Wheel of deuces -Double-whammy feature -"Here's one for you, kid." -Wheels in all directions -- everybody gets some. -Serves to diminish the self-importance of the common passer-by. -Will (in time) replace the common Enraged Driver. The Fuck-Off Machine is programmed to be a native of Hoboken whose gruffy exterior belies the heart of a champion. Still and all, champions can be rough sons of bitches. I would tell you not to take to heart his flipping you off so hard, but...no...he really does mean it. Maybe one day, he will learn to love you. For the sake of scientific research, I need to go chase a pigeon in the Garden. Faretheewell, robolovers! -Steve Robot #1: The Fuck-Off Machine

Current mood: misanthropic
Current music: "Something Against You" - Pixies

A trashcan-shaped robot, with an angry face drawn on it and several arms, all "giving the finger," waving from above its torso, says, "RRG..."
-Wheel of deuces
-Double-whammy feature
-"Here's one for you, kid."
-Wheels in all directions -- everybody gets some.
-Serves to diminish the self-importance of the common passer-by.
-Will (in time) replace the common Enraged Driver.

The Fuck-Off Machine is programmed to be a native of Hoboken whose gruffy exterior belies the heart of a champion. Still and all, champions can be rough sons of bitches. I would tell you not to take to heart his flipping you off so hard, but...no...he really does mean it. Maybe one day, he will learn to love you.
For the sake of scientific research, I need to go chase a pigeon in the Garden. Faretheewell, robolovers!
-Steve]]>