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seamonster

seamonster

You know...

What?

I?m sure there was something I was meaning to do?

Give me that fiver back?

No, you twat. Something else. Other than this.

Other than what?

This. Something other than this.

You?re fucked.

I think I might well be. With my life, I mean, something other than this with my life.

Oh. That.

I had to do all this stuff, man, all this really fucking great stuff. I had to do so much and make so much and really touch people with all this shit that I did, you know? I was meaning to do that.

What happened?

Nothing, I don?t think. I tried. I did stuff. I do stuff, but not how I was really meant to. I seem to have lost track. I seem to have forgotten what all that cool shit actually was, that I?m meant to be doing, you know?

You?re not dead, Dave. Do it tomorrow.

But what? Do what?

Take over the world, or whatever.

I?m not sure that I can, anymore.

Yeah. World?s pretty big.

And we?re stuck up here.

Are we? You want to go down there?

I think so. Eventually. Soon.

[Dave brushing his teeth, looking in the mirror]

[club interior]

Excuse me, have you got a light please?

Sorry? Oh, yeah sure?

Oh, it?s you, hi. You?ve got one of my books, haven?t you?

What books? Here?

Ta. Mythology? I?ve got a set ? different greek myths? I thought you?d borrowed one at college?

No, not me.

You were in my English Lit class though, yeah?

Yeah, but?

Oh right. I must?ve lost it then. Nevermind. See you.

Are you into Greek mythology then? I quite like that myself?

Well, some of it. Look, I have to go. Thanks for the light.

Keep it.

seamonster

seamonster

It?s a lucky charm, keep it.

[Looks at cheap plastic lighter] Right. Thanks. [leaves]

Haven?t seen her since college. Do you remember her?

Mmm. Think so.

Pretty.

Mmm..

COme on. I knew something good would happen tonight. This place isn?t so bad after all, ay?

[Title Page] SEAMONSTER

[Follows girl through crowd. She is gone, but has left her purse.]

Hey!

[Follows her outside. She is nowhere to be seen]

[Monger appears much later]

She left her purse.

[dream]
I think I love this dream. I can?t remember.

It?s my bird dream, and in it I can fly. I have to fly. I tingle, in the pit of my stomach, up my spine and out through my arms. A roller coaster feeling, lighter than air, and I rise, I?m pushed up. I?m house height, and I can see across the rooftops. The tingling is overwhelming and suddenly it?s syrupy to fly. Sluggish. I have to push mentally downwards to stay afloat. But I?m used to this; I know I can get higher, so I push.

Looking down I can see houses, streets, geometry of a dreamtown, and I know I am as high as a bird. When I?m this high flying is easy again. I surge upward, splayed belly-down, effortlessly. I can do nothing to stop rising. Clouds are between the Earth and Me now, gently drifting below, and I slow to a standstill at the top of the sky.

Here are all the others, looking down and smiling. But unlike the other bird dreamers, I roll over. I roll over and I look up.
[dream eof]

seamonster

seamonster

[Dave brushing his teeth, looking in the mirror]

Right, Monger, can you just keep an eye out for that girl from last week?
Monger?

[Toilets]

Dryers eliminate paper towel waste.

Y?what?

They are hygeinic and help protect the environment.

Fuck off.

[Bar. Monger being dragged out by bouncers in background]

Monger?

Hello again!

Mm?

Sorry, hi, I didn?t recognise you. New look?

Top shop.

No, I meant is that a -

Yeah, I know what you meant. I just fancied a change, I get bored easily.

Don?t suppose you?ve seen Monger around?

Who?

The big guy that I was with last week?

Hmm, no, sorry.

Nevermind. [Goes to leave]

Still got my lighter?

What?

Oh right! Haha! Has it, uh, has it brought you any luck?

Not so far, I don?t think. Actually the opposite! I lost my purse!

Oh.

So, I?m still waiting, you know?

Well.

Don?t give up hope.

[outside a takeaway]

Did you tell her you found it?

What? No, I forgot. Well, I didn?t really get the chance. I?ll just bring it out with me next week.

[Dave brushing his teeth, looking in the mirror]

seamonster

seamonster

When I got home there was a little bird in my room.

Its tiny head had blood on it, and it was flying from one window to the other, hurling itself against the glass over and over again.

Both the windows were shut.

I watched it for a while. It looked like a robin, except it didn?t have a red breast. Just the red flecks on its head.

I opened the window, and it flew straight out, up, and landed on top of next doors chimney. It stayed there, and looked back at me until I felt uncomfortable and drew the curtains.

I still don?t understand how it got there in the first place.

[Night club bass booms]

Hi!

Hello.

Is your friend with you tonight?

Which friend? What, Carmen?

That?s it, yeah. I can never remember her name. She was in my English class at college, and on the first day she lied about her name, so I went around for ages calling her ?Prescilla? or something.

?Prudence?.

Yeah, that was it! Prudence. Is she here? I?ve got ?

No. She doesn?t really come here that much anymore. She?s into different stuff now.

Oh. Then maybe you could give her ?

Actually, I think she?s working tonight?

[pause]

Really? Where does she work?

[Diner interior]

Hey, alright?

Oh, Hi. Alright?

seamonster

seamonster

Evening lass. I need to know something.

And what?s that sir?

Do you sell whiskey?

We do.

Good girl!

Shit.

Davey!

Come on, buy your old man a drink!

No Dad.

Come on!

I said no.

Dave!
Here you go, Dave?s Dad, on the house.

Jesus.

Hmmnb ? Bleugh!

Oh shit, DAD! Jesus Christ! Come on.
Um, sorry about that?

You all hate me. Your brother and sister and you.

Sigh

That?s fine. So be it. I don?t care.
I deserve it. I do. It?s good that you hate me. I never meant to be here now, not like this. It took me by surprise, you know? I just thought it would pass?
Dad?

Shut up, Dave. I can get home fine by myself. Just shut up.

[Walks on]

[Girl appears ]

It weren?t the kids.
You reckon it was, right, but it weren?t. It weren?t your Mum, neither, but it was them. Kids are never real, see. The real kids are tumours.
Love leaves tumours. That?s you ?an all. That?ll happen to you ?an all. The same.

[pause]

What?
Give us a quid will ya? I?ve lost me bus fare.

[He does]

Ha ha

[Runs off]

seamonster

seamonster

The ghosts hypnotise me. (They are birds really. Gulls)
About 4am, almost without fail, the ghosts dance.
(My roof is in the dark above the streetlights, but the gulls are lit from below by them, and it makes them glow against the sky.)
A secret performance. My only moment. Actual.

AAAAAH!

FUCK!

Dave?
Who the fuck are you?

What? Oh, right, sorry?

[Removes mask]

It?s me!

Monger?!

What are you doing up here then, Dave?

What am?what am I doing up here? What the fuck are you doing up here?

Training!

You scared the shit out of me man! Uh ? Monger, training for what, exactly?

I dunno, I thought I might have a go at being like Batman or something. Fight crime?you know? Not like Michael Keaton, I don?t mean, but?anyway it?s exercise isn?t it?

You?re so weird.

Yeah.

You actually made that outfit, didn?t you?

Yeah, what?

Please don?t creep up on me like that. This is my roof?

Hey, I always come up here.

You always dress up and run about on my roof?

Well, no ?

I usually just climb up here...

...to watch the ghosts.

Oh.

See the birds? They look like ?

Yeah. I know.