Jesus and Mo - latest additions

Jesus and Mo - latest additions http://jesusandmo.net The latest transcribed Jesus and Mo comics, powered by OhNoRobot.com en-us Tue, 16 Jun 2009 14:42:04 -0000 60 Jesus and Mo ? Archive ? nerve http://jesusandmo.net/2009/06/16/nerve/ http://jesusandmo.net/2009/06/16/nerve/ Tue, 16 Jun 2009 14:37:26 -0000 <a href="http://jesusandmo.net/2009/06/16/nerve/">Jesus and Mo ? Archive ? nerve</a> The religion you atheists criticize is not a religion we recognise. Yeah, Barmaid - you can't dismiss our beliefs if you don't even understand what they are. Let's see - the Christian believes that Jesus is the son of God and that he died for our sins. The Muslim believes that Mo is God's prophet and the Koran is God's final revelation. Those are the claims. I think they are implausible, and the confidence with which they are held by believers is unjustifiable. She's so shrill sometimes. We obviously touched a nerve! Jesus and Mo ? Archive ? nerve

The religion you atheists criticize is not a religion we recognise.
Yeah, Barmaid - you can't dismiss our beliefs if you don't even understand what they are.

Let's see - the Christian believes that Jesus is the son of God and that he died for our sins. The Muslim believes that Mo is God's prophet and the Koran is God's final revelation.

Those are the claims. I think they are implausible, and the confidence with which they are held by believers is unjustifiable.

She's so shrill sometimes.
We obviously touched a nerve!]]> Jesus and Mo ? Archive ? gloss http://jesusandmo.net/2009/06/12/gloss/ http://jesusandmo.net/2009/06/12/gloss/ Fri, 12 Jun 2009 18:25:55 -0000 <a href="http://jesusandmo.net/2009/06/12/gloss/">Jesus and Mo ? Archive ? gloss</a> [[Mo, clad in dark burqa, sitting next to Jesus on a bench]] Jesus: I'm beginning to understand the idea behind the TONY BLAIR FAITH FOUNDATION Jesus: On the face of it, the principle is ABSURD Jesus: Promoting PEACE by increasing INTER-FAITH UNDERSTANDING makes about as much sense as promoting SOBRIETY by increasing ALCOHOL CONSUMPTION Jesus: So the idea must be to GLOSS OVER the mutually-antagonistic SPECIFICS of each religion and focus instead on the LARGER PICTURE... Jesus: ...the things that the WHOLE WORLD can belive in Mo: Peace and love? Jesus: and Tony Blair Jesus and Mo ? Archive ? gloss

[[Mo, clad in dark burqa, sitting next to Jesus on a bench]]
Jesus: I'm beginning to understand the idea behind the TONY BLAIR FAITH FOUNDATION
Jesus: On the face of it, the principle is ABSURD

Jesus: Promoting PEACE by increasing INTER-FAITH UNDERSTANDING makes about as much sense as promoting SOBRIETY by increasing ALCOHOL CONSUMPTION

Jesus: So the idea must be to GLOSS OVER the mutually-antagonistic SPECIFICS of each religion and focus instead on the LARGER PICTURE...
Jesus: ...the things that the WHOLE WORLD can belive in

Mo: Peace and love?
Jesus: and Tony Blair]]> Jesus and Mo ? Archive ? marry http://jesusandmo.net/2009/06/09/marry/ http://jesusandmo.net/2009/06/09/marry/ Tue, 09 Jun 2009 14:07:35 -0000 <a href="http://jesusandmo.net/2009/06/09/marry/">Jesus and Mo ? Archive ? marry</a> Mo, these "revelations" you get from Allah - they're a bit self-serving sometimes, aren't they? Like here in 33:50 where God says you can have any believing woman who desires you. It is God's will. Or that time when you fancied your stepdaughter, and subsequently went into a trance wherein Allah told you to go ahead and "marry" her. How convenient! Even your little wife Aisha was suspicious: "I feel that your Lord hastens in fulfilling your wishes and desires," she said (Bukhari 6:60:311). Ha ha! That girl had you figured out, didn't she, Mo? God wants you to shut up now. Jesus and Mo ? Archive ? marry

Mo, these "revelations" you get from Allah - they're a bit self-serving sometimes, aren't they? Like here in 33:50 where God says you can have any believing woman who desires you.

It is God's will.
Or that time when you fancied your stepdaughter, and subsequently went into a trance wherein Allah told you to go ahead and "marry" her.

How convenient! Even your little wife Aisha was suspicious: "I feel that your Lord hastens in fulfilling your wishes and desires," she said (Bukhari 6:60:311).

Ha ha! That girl had you figured out, didn't she, Mo?
God wants you to shut up now.]]> Jesus and Mo ? Archive ? lines http://jesusandmo.net/2009/06/05/lines/ http://jesusandmo.net/2009/06/05/lines/ Sat, 06 Jun 2009 08:09:50 -0000 <a href="http://jesusandmo.net/2009/06/05/lines/">Jesus and Mo ? Archive ? lines</a> A reader is asking why you get all the best lines. Good question! Why is that? Because I'm smarter than you. Bah! Upon what evidence do you base such an outrageous assertion? Shall we compare resum?s? You preached for a couple of years, gained a handful of followers, got into trouble with the authorities, and died painfully at the age of 32 - apparently still a virgin. I amassed thousands of followers, led armies to victory, married thirteen times, and died of natural causes in my 60s. By which time virtually the entire Arab Peninsula was under my command. Why do you always have to bring my virginity into it? Because it's funny. Jesus and Mo ? Archive ? lines

A reader is asking why you get all the best lines. Good question! Why is that?
Because I'm smarter than you.

Bah! Upon what evidence do you base such an outrageous assertion?
Shall we compare resum?s? You preached for a couple of years, gained a handful of followers, got into trouble with the authorities, and died painfully at the age of 32 - apparently still a virgin.

I amassed thousands of followers, led armies to victory, married thirteen times, and died of natural causes in my 60s. By which time virtually the entire Arab Peninsula was under my command.

Why do you always have to bring my virginity into it?
Because it's funny.]]> Jesus and Mo ? Archive ? harm http://jesusandmo.net/2009/06/03/harm/ http://jesusandmo.net/2009/06/03/harm/ Wed, 03 Jun 2009 11:26:29 -0000 <a href="http://jesusandmo.net/2009/06/03/harm/">Jesus and Mo ? Archive ? harm</a> Catholic spokesperson on radio: That Ryan Commission report was just anti-catholic propaganda. Reuters reported that priests beat and raped children - that's just not true... Catholic spokesperson on radio: ... a lot of children weren't raped, and a lot of the abusers weren't priests! Why the hysteria? Opponent on radio: I'm sorry, but the facts are... Catholic spokesperson on radio: SHUT UP! Catholic spokesperson on radio: You want to talk about facts, mister? Those wre mild punitive measures commonly used at the time. Abuse?? Ha ha ha! Listen - I was beaten by nuns when I was a kid... Catholic spokesperson on radio: ... it never did me any harm!! Mo: Not an indisputable claim Jesus and Mo ? Archive ? harm

Catholic spokesperson on radio: That Ryan Commission report was just anti-catholic propaganda. Reuters reported that priests beat and raped children - that's just not true...

Catholic spokesperson on radio: ... a lot of children weren't raped, and a lot of the abusers weren't priests! Why the hysteria?
Opponent on radio: I'm sorry, but the facts are...
Catholic spokesperson on radio: SHUT UP!

Catholic spokesperson on radio: You want to talk about facts, mister? Those wre mild punitive measures commonly used at the time. Abuse?? Ha ha ha! Listen - I was beaten by nuns when I was a kid...

Catholic spokesperson on radio: ... it never did me any harm!!
Mo: Not an indisputable claim]]> Jesus and Mo ? Archive ? laugh http://jesusandmo.net/2009/05/28/laugh/ http://jesusandmo.net/2009/05/28/laugh/ Thu, 28 May 2009 13:20:23 -0000 <a href="http://jesusandmo.net/2009/05/28/laugh/">Jesus and Mo ? Archive ? laugh</a> Atheists are humorless souls. In their arrogance, they do not believe in the existence of anything greater than themselves. And because they lack the humility that such a belief entails, atheists cannot laugh at themselves. Unlike us. This is another reason why we are superior to them. What are you laughing at? Jesus and Mo ? Archive ? laugh

Atheists are humorless souls.
In their arrogance, they do not believe in the existence of anything greater than themselves.

And because they lack the humility that such a belief entails, atheists cannot laugh at themselves.
Unlike us.

This is another reason why we are superior to them.

What are you laughing at?]]> Jesus and Mo ? Archive ? cars http://jesusandmo.net/2009/05/26/cars/ http://jesusandmo.net/2009/05/26/cars/ Tue, 26 May 2009 19:25:06 -0000 <a href="http://jesusandmo.net/2009/05/26/cars/">Jesus and Mo ? Archive ? cars</a> I see that your guys are a-ragin' and a-burnin' again. Where? Athens. What are they doing? The usual... ...throwing stones, breaking shop windows, flipping cars, burning flags, and accidentally setting fire to themselves. Why? They want people to respect them. Flipping cars is awesome. But not, it must be said, a particularly respectable activity. Jesus and Mo ? Archive ? cars

I see that your guys are a-ragin' and a-burnin' again.
Where?
Athens.

What are they doing?
The usual...

...throwing stones, breaking shop windows, flipping cars, burning flags, and accidentally setting fire to themselves.
Why?

They want people to respect them.
Flipping cars is awesome.
But not, it must be said, a particularly respectable activity.]]> Jesus and Mo ? Archive ? thor http://jesusandmo.net/2009/04/24/thor/#respond http://jesusandmo.net/2009/04/24/thor/#respond Fri, 22 May 2009 09:25:37 -0000 <a href="http://jesusandmo.net/2009/04/24/thor/#respond">Jesus and Mo ? Archive ? thor</a> [[in the bar]] Barmaid: You have to admit that humans have invented a lot of gods - and you don't feel obliged to take any of them seriously. Like Thor, who smote his enemies with lightning bolts. Jesus: Thor doesn't strike me as plausible. Mo: Ha ha! Good one, Jesus! Barmaid: Or that Egyptian god, who created lesser gods by spitting out his own semen. Mo: That is hard to swallow! Jesus: Ha ha ah! Barmaid: Or that one who deliberately created beings he knew would piss him off? Jesus: Praise be to the Heavenly Father! Mo: La illaha illa Allah. Jesus and Mo ? Archive ? thor

[[in the bar]]
Barmaid: You have to admit that humans have invented a lot of gods - and you don't feel obliged to take any of them seriously. Like Thor, who smote his enemies with lightning bolts.

Jesus: Thor doesn't strike me as plausible.
Mo: Ha ha! Good one, Jesus!
Barmaid: Or that Egyptian god, who created lesser gods by spitting out his own semen.

Mo: That is hard to swallow!
Jesus: Ha ha ah!
Barmaid: Or that one who deliberately created beings he knew would piss him off?

Jesus: Praise be to the Heavenly Father!
Mo: La illaha illa Allah.]]> Jesus and Mo ? Archive ? vital http://jesusandmo.net/2009/05/22/vital/ http://jesusandmo.net/2009/05/22/vital/ Fri, 22 May 2009 09:17:51 -0000 <a href="http://jesusandmo.net/2009/05/22/vital/">Jesus and Mo ? Archive ? vital</a> [[in the bar]] Jesus: That Irish Catholic child abuse report is just horrific. My heart goes out to them Jesus: After all these years, to have your wounds opened up to the public... and for what? It takes real courage to face up to those terrible facts from the past, but with faith they can overcome the pain and the shame and emerge stronger for it. Barmaid: But many of those thousands abused as children have lost their faith now. Jesus: I'm not talking about the children Jesus: I'm talking about the Church - there is still vital work to be done, defending the vulnerable and the unborn. Mo: Jesus Christ! Jesus and Mo ? Archive ? vital

[[in the bar]]

Jesus: That Irish Catholic child abuse report is just horrific. My heart goes out to them

Jesus: After all these years, to have your wounds opened up to the public... and for what? It takes real courage to face up to those terrible facts from the past, but with faith they can overcome the pain and the shame and emerge stronger for it.

Barmaid: But many of those thousands abused as children have lost their faith now.
Jesus: I'm not talking about the children

Jesus: I'm talking about the Church - there is still vital work to be done, defending the vulnerable and the unborn.
Mo: Jesus Christ!]]> Jesus and Mo ? Archive ? tired http://jesusandmo.net/2009/05/20/tired/ http://jesusandmo.net/2009/05/20/tired/ Wed, 20 May 2009 16:55:49 -0000 <a href="http://jesusandmo.net/2009/05/20/tired/">Jesus and Mo ? Archive ? tired</a> I'm so tired of all these new atheists attacking us people of faith Me too They are not interested in engaging seriously with thoughtful believers All they do is engage in angry name-calling and whine about being persecuted Yeah, why can't those bloody bastards just leave us alone Jesus and Mo ? Archive ? tired

I'm so tired of all these new atheists attacking us people of faith
Me too

They are not interested in engaging seriously with thoughtful believers

All they do is engage in angry name-calling and whine about being persecuted

Yeah, why can't those bloody bastards just leave us alone]]>