Simulated Comic Product - latest additions

Simulated Comic Product - latest additions http://simulatedcomicproduct.com The latest transcribed Simulated Comic Product comics, powered by OhNoRobot.com en-us Mon, 20 Apr 2009 19:09:57 -0000 60 Simulated Comic Product - Industrial Strength http://simulatedcomicproduct.com/index.php?cid=111 http://simulatedcomicproduct.com/index.php?cid=111 Fri, 18 Aug 2006 14:11:06 -0000 <a href="http://simulatedcomicproduct.com/index.php?cid=111">Simulated Comic Product - Industrial Strength</a> {{Title: Industrial Strength}} Delivery Man A: Sack of puppies? Security Guard: Tank seven. Delivery Man A: Long line-up today, huh? Delivery Man B: How can butterflies be so heavy? [[Blank Panel]] Concerned Shopper: Oh, cool, these are made from all-natural ingredients. I can feel good about feeling good(tm). Simulated Comic Product - Industrial Strength

{{Title: Industrial Strength}}

Delivery Man A: Sack of puppies?
Security Guard: Tank seven.

Delivery Man A: Long line-up today, huh?
Delivery Man B: How can butterflies be so heavy?

[[Blank Panel]]

Concerned Shopper: Oh, cool, these are made from all-natural ingredients. I can feel good about feeling good.]]> Simulated Comic Product - It's Time http://simulatedcomicproduct.com/index.php?cid=115 http://simulatedcomicproduct.com/index.php?cid=115 Tue, 01 Aug 2006 14:49:24 -0000 <a href="http://simulatedcomicproduct.com/index.php?cid=115">Simulated Comic Product - It's Time</a> Devil: It's time, Mary. Mary: Please, No! Just give me a bit longer. Devil: I held up MY end of the bargain, didn't I? Mary: Yes, but- Devil: You promised me your first born. I've come to collect. Mary: But it's not his fault! He's just a child. Devil: Oh Mary. I do tire of putting this off. I suppose that I could grant you just ONE more extension. I will require the usual payment of course. Mary: Fine. Take this... He made it for me this morning. Devil: How touching. I'll enjoy reading this it in hell. Simulated Comic Product - It's Time

Devil: It's time, Mary.

Mary: Please, No! Just give me a bit longer.
Devil: I held up MY end of the bargain, didn't I?
Mary: Yes, but-
Devil: You promised me your first born. I've come to collect.
Mary: But it's not his fault! He's just a child.

Devil: Oh Mary. I do tire of putting this off. I suppose that I could grant you just ONE more extension. I will require the usual payment of course.

Mary: Fine. Take this... He made it for me this morning.
Devil: How touching. I'll enjoy reading this it in hell.]]> Simulated Comic Product - A Man Walks In http://simulatedcomicproduct.com/index.php?cid=122 http://simulatedcomicproduct.com/index.php?cid=122 Wed, 19 Jul 2006 14:21:21 -0000 <a href="http://simulatedcomicproduct.com/index.php?cid=122">Simulated Comic Product - A Man Walks In</a> A man walks into a bar. He proceeds to drink heavily. By closing time he can barely stand. The bouncer has to kick him out. When he finally stumbles home, he finds a note from his wife. She has tired of his alcoholism, and wants a divorce. He spends his remaining years alone and bitter. He eventually dies in a drunken stupor. Get off the stage, ya stinkin' robot! Don't take it personally, kid. Robot jokes just ain't the same thing as human jokes. Simulated Comic Product - A Man Walks In

A man walks into a bar.
He proceeds to drink heavily.

By closing time he can barely stand. The bouncer has to kick him out.

When he finally stumbles home, he finds a note from his wife.
She has tired of his alcoholism, and wants a divorce.

He spends his remaining years alone and bitter. He eventually dies in a drunken stupor.

Get off the stage, ya stinkin' robot!

Don't take it personally, kid.
Robot jokes just ain't the same thing as human jokes.]]> Simulated Comic Product - Iterative Design Improvements http://simulatedcomicproduct.com/index.php?cid=114 http://simulatedcomicproduct.com/index.php?cid=114 Wed, 19 Jul 2006 14:21:18 -0000 <a href="http://simulatedcomicproduct.com/index.php?cid=114">Simulated Comic Product - Iterative Design Improvements</a> Hey, nice work on the composite casing. It really cuts down on the magnetic signature. Thanks! The new model should be almost undetectable. Text: (HG71) Anti-Personnel Explosive It should also last a lot longer, too. There'll be no rust or leakage. Say, are you guys going to the company picnic? Of course. My kids love those things. Simulated Comic Product - Iterative Design Improvements

Hey, nice work on the composite casing. It really cuts down on the magnetic signature.
Thanks! The new model should be almost undetectable.

Text: (HG71) Anti-Personnel Explosive
It should also last a lot longer, too. There'll be no rust or leakage.

Say, are you guys going to the company picnic?

Of course. My kids love those things.]]> Simulated Comic Product - 95 Percent http://simulatedcomicproduct.com/index.php?cid=113 http://simulatedcomicproduct.com/index.php?cid=113 Wed, 19 Jul 2006 14:21:15 -0000 <a href="http://simulatedcomicproduct.com/index.php?cid=113">Simulated Comic Product - 95 Percent</a> Come on, you can't waste a day like this inside. They never cover anything important during the last class anyway. Text: U Text: Department of Medicine Text: MED407: Advanced Surgical Techniques Text: Final Exam Text: 95% Text: Excellent work! Text: Name: Text: Date: May 23 Text: Section: 002 Nice work, doctor. Now close the patient and we can all go home. Close? Simulated Comic Product - 95 Percent

Come on, you can't waste a day like this inside. They never cover anything important during the last class anyway.
Text: U

Text: Department of Medicine
Text: MED407: Advanced Surgical Techniques
Text: Final Exam
Text: 95%
Text: Excellent work!
Text: Name:
Text: Date: May 23
Text: Section: 002

Nice work, doctor. Now close the patient and we can all go home.
Close?]]> Simulated Comic Product - Up Late http://simulatedcomicproduct.com/index.php?cid=120 http://simulatedcomicproduct.com/index.php?cid=120 Tue, 18 Jul 2006 03:37:28 -0000 <a href="http://simulatedcomicproduct.com/index.php?cid=120">Simulated Comic Product - Up Late</a> Hello? Hello. You go sleep now. You no stay up late no more. It now three A.M.! You go bed now, or mother no love you Mom? Is that you? Why are you talking like that? Is something wrong? You know that I can't sleep at night- that's when they come for me! You break mother's heart. If you no sleep, you bad son! Simulated Comic Product - Up Late

Hello?
Hello. You go sleep now.

You no stay up late no more. It now three A.M.! You go bed now, or mother no love you

Mom? Is that you? Why are you talking like that? Is something wrong?

You know that I can't sleep at night- that's when they come for me!
You break mother's heart. If you no sleep, you bad son!]]> Simulated Comic Product - Marketing Genius http://simulatedcomicproduct.com/index.php?cid=105 http://simulatedcomicproduct.com/index.php?cid=105 Wed, 28 Jun 2006 03:44:03 -0000 <a href="http://simulatedcomicproduct.com/index.php?cid=105">Simulated Comic Product - Marketing Genius</a> Off screen voice: Things are looking bad, George. If we don't find a way to increase sales soon, the company will go bankrupt. George: How about... funny hats? Children love funny hats! George: We have a two-for-one deal on this model, which can come in handy if you have any surviving children. Simulated Comic Product - Marketing Genius

Off screen voice: Things are looking bad, George.
If we don't find a way to increase sales soon, the company will go bankrupt.

George: How about... funny hats?
Children love funny hats!

George: We have a two-for-one deal on this model, which can come in handy if you have any surviving children.]]> Simulated Comic Product - Is He? http://simulatedcomicproduct.com/index.php?cid=121 http://simulatedcomicproduct.com/index.php?cid=121 Tue, 27 Jun 2006 02:48:35 -0000 <a href="http://simulatedcomicproduct.com/index.php?cid=121">Simulated Comic Product - Is He?</a> Is he? Oh yeah. And for quite a while, too. [Poking at dead guy] We've been lost for days now. We have no food or water with us. He's already dead... That's disgusting. How can you still be hungry? We just finished the last one two hours ago! Simulated Comic Product - Is He?

Is he?
Oh yeah. And for quite a while, too. [Poking at dead guy]

We've been lost for days now. We have no food or water with us. He's already dead...
That's disgusting.

How can you still be hungry? We just finished the last one two hours ago!]]> Simulated Comic Product - New Toy http://simulatedcomicproduct.com/index.php?cid=118 http://simulatedcomicproduct.com/index.php?cid=118 Mon, 05 Jun 2006 14:18:09 -0000 <a href="http://simulatedcomicproduct.com/index.php?cid=118">Simulated Comic Product - New Toy</a> [[A young boy stands near an opened gift box and a small robot.]] Parent: Why don't you go outside and try out your new toy? Boy: Let's be best friends! [[The boy and the robot are crossing a log bridge.]] Boy: The water sure is moving fast! Be careful that you don't fall in. [[The robot is back inside, alone, dripping wet and looking dejected.]] Parent: Do you know how expensive those things are? You aren't getting another one, Mister. Simulated Comic Product - New Toy

[[A young boy stands near an opened gift box and a small robot.]]
Parent: Why don't you go outside and try out your new toy?
Boy: Let's be best friends!

[[The boy and the robot are crossing a log bridge.]]
Boy: The water sure is moving fast! Be careful that you don't fall in.

[[The robot is back inside, alone, dripping wet and looking dejected.]]
Parent: Do you know how expensive those things are? You aren't getting another one, Mister.]]> Simulated Comic Product - Travellin' Vaudeville Man http://simulatedcomicproduct.com/index.php?cid=116 http://simulatedcomicproduct.com/index.php?cid=116 Wed, 31 May 2006 02:16:45 -0000 <a href="http://simulatedcomicproduct.com/index.php?cid=116">Simulated Comic Product - Travellin' Vaudeville Man</a> There just ain't no place left in the world for a travellin' vaudeville man. I may as well end it all This is all your fault! You there, don't pull that trigger! You're going to be my next big star! Places, everyone! And remember... We only get one take for this shot. Simulated Comic Product - Travellin' Vaudeville Man

There just ain't no place left in the world for a travellin' vaudeville man.
I may as well end it all

This is all your fault!

You there, don't pull that trigger! You're going to be my next big star!

Places, everyone! And remember...
We only get one take for this shot.]]>